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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 715720 times)

Loud Whispers

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4230 on: January 27, 2019, 08:23:31 pm »
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Starver

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4231 on: January 28, 2019, 10:19:42 am »
Did you hear about what was left when the German baker went home for the night without locking up properly?

It was all stollen!
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Culise

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4232 on: January 28, 2019, 08:46:08 pm »
Quote from: The Annotated Pratchett
"I'm into homosexual necrophilia," said Tom in dead earnest.
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Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4233 on: February 01, 2019, 06:49:35 am »
Words like "trans" and "nonbinary" and "genderfluid" are all outdated and loaded with negative baggage. "Cisn't" is much better.


EDIT: Q: How much of the world's currency is counterfeit?

A: Nearly all of it, only Brazil has the real.
« Last Edit: February 01, 2019, 02:46:55 pm by Kagus »
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overseer05-15

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4234 on: February 03, 2019, 12:11:23 am »
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up?
It was exhausted.
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Bumber

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4235 on: February 03, 2019, 01:49:26 pm »
Quote from: overseer05-15 on February 03, 2019, 12:11:23 am
Why couldn't the bicycle stand up?
It was exhausted.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
A motorcycle would more easily be exhausted.
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Quote from: Ispil on August 30, 2018, 01:17:08 pm
Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

martinuzz

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4236 on: February 03, 2019, 02:08:06 pm »
Why did Hitler never use a taxi?
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TD1

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4237 on: February 03, 2019, 04:09:18 pm »
Nietzsche joke.
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overseer05-15

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4238 on: February 04, 2019, 02:08:29 am »
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on February 03, 2019, 04:09:18 pm
Nietzsche joke.

God is dead, jesus is bread

(he is risen)
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redwallzyl

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4239 on: February 04, 2019, 04:01:34 pm »
Quote from: overseer05-15 on February 04, 2019, 02:08:29 am
Quote from: Th4DwArfY1 on February 03, 2019, 04:09:18 pm
Nietzsche joke.

God is dead, jesus is bread

(he is risen)
The Father, the son, and the Holy Toast.
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methylatedspirit

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4240 on: February 07, 2019, 11:44:39 am »
The absolute worst joke that I thought up and told to my "friends" back in my embarrassing "random" days:
A baby is born in a hospital.
The doctor asks the woman to give her child a name.
The woman responds, "Cheeseburger."
The doctor says, "Would you like fries with that?"

Yes, I thought that was hilarious.
I'm glad those days of shoehorning objects into arbitrary structures, and thinking that the result was good enough to show others, are over.
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Bumber

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4241 on: February 07, 2019, 11:55:52 am »
Quote from: methylatedspirit on February 07, 2019, 11:44:39 am
I'm glad those days of shoehorning objects into arbitrary structures, and thinking that the result was good enough to show others, are over.
Now you can show the result to others knowing it's not good enough! Oh, how things change!
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Quote from: Ispil on August 30, 2018, 01:17:08 pm
Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

methylatedspirit

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4242 on: February 07, 2019, 12:27:58 pm »
Dude, do you have some kind of philosopher's stone, or something? You just turned my garbage joke to gold!
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Kagus

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4243 on: February 10, 2019, 04:26:01 am »
Step 1: Pack rice into oblong patties

Step 2: Gently place two slices of artificial melon on the rice

Step 3: Present.


Voilà; Jessica Nigiri.
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Baffler

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #4244 on: February 11, 2019, 05:27:26 am »
Did you ever hear the one about the three blondes and the beer can?

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