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[Sir Elventide]

What's the difference between Jurassic Park's velociraptors and internet trolls?

I don't know but at least the velociraptors knew how to use their brains.

[Starver]

I used to work in the printing industry, one of the people feeding the machines. Repetitious work, oh so boring, but so many characters!

[Sir Elventide]

What do you call a French internet troll?

A virtual Parisite.

[Starver]

(Reminds me of one or other version of)
What do you call a little creature regularly found on the Paris train system?

A Metronome.

[Sir Elventide]

What do you call an internet troll who never starts arguments or incite flame wars.

Mature.

[hector13]

Non-existent.

[Silverthrone]

I.

For you see, Mother was a comedian, Father was a tragic.

One can call it a compromise.

[Sir Elventide]

They said that I can become a demolition man when I grow up but I wreckin' that I can see my dreams crumbling down to ruins.

[Starver]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-40999000

(Take your double-ended sharpened stone percussive-and-leverage tool...)

And, if you don't see any terrible ones: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2017/aug/21/solar-eclipse-eye-damage

[Ekaton]

There's only one thing worse than having a girlfriend with no tits: having no girlfriend and tits!

That's just 

[Sir Elventide]

I'd always knew that Nuke Rider was a brutish jerk. After all, he always did felt as if he have power between his legs...

How's that for double entente!

[IcyTea31]

Once upon a time a golfer sent his ball straight into a deep, deep sand trap. He grabbed his trusty nine-iron and hopped into the bunker. At first, he couldn't find his ball anywhere, so he walked deeper, where he saw something sparkle in the sun. He walked closer and saw that the glint came from a nine-iron in the hands of an old, sun-bleached skeleton. Startled, he quickly ran near the edge of the bunker and yelled to his caddie: "Bring my wedge, a nine-iron isn't enough for this one!"

[SeriousConcentrate]

Not sure if terrible.

Same goes for you Cinder.

[hops]

What do you call a game where you hit avocadoes whenever they pop out of the ground?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Guac-a-mole

[Sir Elventide]

One summer night, a man sat in a bar that was crowded. A few minutes after having a particularly bubbly drink, he felt like passing gas. However, since the bar was full and he didn't want to embarrass himself, he turned up the volume and farted to the tune of the music. When he was finished, he turned to find everyone staring at him with confused looks on their faces. At first, he was bewildered at how they could've heard him farting until it dawned on him:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

He was wearing headphones.