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Author Topic: Terrible Jokes  (Read 712370 times)

Bumber

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3240 on: April 07, 2016, 03:22:55 am »

Heh heh. Say...

 What do call the Leaning Tower of Piza?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
Why do you call the Leaning Tower of Pizza?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Reading his name would trigger it. Thinking of him would trigger it. No other circumstances would trigger it- it was strictly related to the concept of Bill Clinton entering the conscious mind.

THE xTROLL FUR SOCKx RUSE WAS A........... DISTACTION        the carp HAVE the wagon

A wizard has turned you into a wagon. This was inevitable (Y/y)?

IcyTea31

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3241 on: April 07, 2016, 12:10:58 pm »

The newest Cyanide & Happiness gives us a joke so obscure, I have to post it here. Really, it's terrible even if you do get it.
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There is a world yet only seen by physicists and magicians.

Tomasque

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3242 on: April 10, 2016, 05:43:52 pm »

Heh heh. Say...

 What do call the Leaning Tower of Piza?
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
9/11 jokes aren't funny if people don't get them...  :(
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Tomasque

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3243 on: April 10, 2016, 05:46:05 pm »

The newest Cyanide & Happiness gives us a joke so obscure, I have to post it here. Really, it's terrible even if you do get it.
Darkworld?
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The quantum cannonball hits you in the face and misses!
Money!
GENERATION grisha5: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.

IcyTea31

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3244 on: April 11, 2016, 01:18:00 am »

Spoiler: Explaining the joke (click to show/hide)
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hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3245 on: April 11, 2016, 01:21:45 am »

Spoiler: Explaining the joke (click to show/hide)

That is so obscure as to be a good answer on Pointless.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.

a1s

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3246 on: April 11, 2016, 06:55:26 am »

Spoiler: Explaining the joke (click to show/hide)
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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I tried to play chess but two of my opponents were playing competitive checkers as a third person walked in with Game of Thrones in hand confused cause they thought this was the book club.

IcyTea31

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3247 on: April 11, 2016, 07:29:36 am »

Also what's with the Out of Business sign?
Maybe the door was too difficult to open and no customers could ever enter the store to browse?
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hops

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3248 on: April 11, 2016, 08:09:07 am »

Nobody except the hypnotizer guy understood how to open the door.
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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3249 on: April 11, 2016, 11:15:22 am »

Maybe it's just a shitty joke?

a1s

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3250 on: April 14, 2016, 03:12:24 am »

Maybe it's just a shitty joke?
That's what I'm thinking. C&H isn't exactly known for Allenesque level of intellectual in-jokes.
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I tried to play chess but two of my opponents were playing competitive checkers as a third person walked in with Game of Thrones in hand confused cause they thought this was the book club.

SquatchHammer

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3251 on: April 17, 2016, 04:52:43 pm »

If you were paying attention, he had made the guy fall asleep so well that if any other customer came in to get help, he wouldnt have any returning customers. Thus he would reach saturation and loose enough business to keep open in said area.
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That's technically an action, not a speech... Well it was only a matter of time before I had to write another scene of utter and horrifying perversion.

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Insanegame27

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3252 on: April 17, 2016, 05:48:42 pm »

Person 1: Want to hear a Nazi Joke?
Person 2: No, my grandfather died at a prison camp in WW2.
Person 1: ... Sorry, dude.
Person 2: He got drunk and fell off the watchtower.
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The military cannot function without tanks and warplanes, therefore the right of the people to keep and bear tanks and warplanes, shall not be infringed.
The military cannot function without ICBMs, therefore the right of the people to keep and bear ICBMs, shall not be infringed.

Helgoland

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3253 on: April 17, 2016, 05:55:13 pm »

That one's oooooooooooold. Variation:

- My grandfather died in Buchenwald.
- Oh, he fell off the watchtower? Huehuehue
- No, you sick fuck - they gassed him because he hid a Jewish family in his attic!
- OhmyGodI'msosorryetcetc
- JK, he really did fall off the watchtower.


Anyway, here's an original one:

- Why are ghosts lonely?
- They have no body to talk to.
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hector13

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Re: Terrible Jokes
« Reply #3254 on: April 17, 2016, 06:09:45 pm »

That was original about a hundred years ago.
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Look, we need to raise a psychopath who will murder God, we have no time to be spending on cooking.

the way your fingertips plant meaningless soliloquies makes me think you are the true evil among us.
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