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Poll

Why can the omnipotent manage to be incompotent?

The infighting is causing too much trouble.
- 10 (30.3%)
People won't let me do as I please!
- 6 (18.2%)
NPC's are OP, and are ruining my plans.
- 2 (6.1%)
The GM is a bastard, under-powering my actions
- 7 (21.2%)
I have no opinion on this matter.
- 8 (24.2%)

Total Members Voted: 33


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Author Topic: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE: LONG NAMES. Y'ALL COMPENSATIN FOR SOMETHING?  (Read 70038 times)

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #285 on: December 09, 2012, 05:07:58 pm »

...Destroy some NPCs?
Get GM's thanks.
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Xantalos

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #286 on: December 09, 2012, 06:13:01 pm »

This is the only RTD I've seen with a battle between the Emperor of Mankind and Armok. Awesome.
Continue to train under both Armok and Emprah as they battle, becoming the best warrior ever.
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Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #287 on: December 09, 2012, 06:51:07 pm »

>Go back in time.
>Impede all progress to restoring power.
>Get own pendant.
>Travel one turn into the future.
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misko27

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #288 on: December 10, 2012, 12:50:38 am »

Turn 18: Npcs slaughtered unceremoniously.
Ensure neither Cassandra nor her bitch interferes with our plan.

Now. My forces now shall push straight through to the galactic core in a three pronged attack, where upon we shall focus our abilities upon corrupting the super massive black hole. Have the ghostbusters add their captives to our forces.

If need be, summon forth New Jersey to add to our forces. Assist Corai, seeing how TCM has betrayed us.

(5) CASSANDRA AND HER PET PREGNANT POODLE SHALL NOT INTERFERE. (2+1+1) THE PHALLI PUSH DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO THE CENTER, CRUSHING THE OPPOSITION AND TAKING THE INNUEDO TO A NEW LEVEL. (5) YOU DON'T NEED IT, OR I'D KILL YOU RIGHT NOW. (5) CORAI ASSISTED.
 
 
 
Wait. I can still command my forces from here. And I cannot be attacked. YOINK, YOU FAILED. I AM IMMUNE TO ALL ATTACKS NOW.

Build up colonized planet. Train ABCS members to become military forces.

Establish trade routes with Terra.

Send fine china to Yoink.

(5) THEY FOCUS ON REGAINING POWER AND ESTABLISHING CONTROL, ABCS BECEOMS A MILITARY FORCE. (5) SURE. (5) YOU EXPORT IT THROUGH THE TERRANS.

Absorb a few planets in Matter to Energy conversion, restoring power.

Regroup forces, and send a fleet in for the kill on the phalli.

Strip mine half of Andromeda to build more fleets. Lots more. Eight hundred world destroying fleets of ships slaved to the main AI (Me).

(5) DESTRUCTIVE MOTHERFUCKER. (5) FLEET SENT. (5-1) YOU FOCUS ON STRIP MINING AND BUILDING WHILE THE PHALLI RANSACK YOUR CITIZENS.

FORM INNERSPHERE ALLIANCE.
THEN HAVE CLAN WOLF JOIN US.
THEN SPREAD PUT ACROSS UNIVERSE.
HELP DESTROY VIRUS AND PHALIC ARMY.
(5) OH FUCK YOU. (5) SURE. (5) WHATEVER. (5VS4+1) SORRY. THEY TEAM UP AND YOUR FORCES CANNOT DEFEAT THEM TOGETHER!

SHOOT CORAI WITH 7 MAC 11s, ABOUT 8 .38s, 9 9s, and 10 MAC 10s.

THEN STEAL ALL HIS STUFF AND ALLIES AND SELL THEM TO IKEA

BREAK TAVIK TOTH WITH A BASEBALL BAT

ARESIA HAS GUNS, SO KILL THEM WITH A KNIFE

SEEING HOW SPINAL HAS BETRAYED US, ALSO STAB HIM WITH KNIFE

HAVE SODOMY-BASED ORGY WITH CASSANDRA AND ALL DEM' WHITE GIRLS

STOP ZANZETSUKEN FROM TIME TRAVELING BY SHOOTING HIS LIVER

YOU CERTAINLY LIKE THEM ACTIONS DON'T YOU? (5) YOU REPEATEDLY SHOOT THE PRISON OF CORAI. (5) YOU ARE FAR MORE SUCESSFUL AT ROBBING HIM, THOUGH, CONSIDERIGN HIS PREDICAMENT. (5) TAVIK IS BROKEN. (5vs5) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=anEuw8F8cpE (5) SPINAL WAS NEVER ON YOUR SIDE REALLY, THAT DOESN'T STOP YOU FROM STABBING HIM THOUGH. (5) WHAT IS WRONG WITH Y'ALL? CASSANDRA IS BENT OVER A TABLE AND TAKEN UP THE BUTT. BY YOU. (5) HOW DID YOU KNOW HIS KRYPONITE IS LIVER SHOTS?

GO FAR AWAY. MAKE NEW EMPIRE OF EXPLOSION BEINGS.
(5) TO CANADA YOU GO! (5) THERE YOU FOUND EMPIRE.

...Destroy some NPCs?
Get GM's thanks.

(5) VARIOUS NPCS THE GM DOES NOT FEEL LIKE ROLLING FOR ARE ANNIHILATED. THANKS.

This is the only RTD I've seen with a battle between the Emperor of Mankind and Armok. Awesome.
Continue to train under both Armok and Emprah as they battle, becoming the best warrior ever.
THAT'S BECAUSE IS BEST RTD. (5) YOU TRAIN AS THEY CONTINEU TO WAR. THE WORLD IS TURNED TO CINDERS BY THE CONSTANT BATTLE, NEITHER GIVING A INCH.

>Go back in time.
>Impede all progress to restoring power.
>Get own pendant.
>Travel one turn into the future.
(5) TIME TRAVLING ANNOYS GM. (5) CASSANDRA AND CORAI SABOTAGED. JAPANESE KILLED. (5) FUTURE FOR YOU.

NPCS
(5) THE ARESIA SAVE THE CITY OF NEW HELIOS, AND GET WORKING ON SAVING THE OTHERS, CRISIS AVERTED.

(3) THE COLONISTS ARE NOT SLAUHGTERED, BUT AGREE TO STOP BEING NPCS IN EXCHANGE FOR LIFE.

(5) THE GHOST DIVISION MANS UP, RETAKES NEARBY PLANETS.

(4) VIRUS CONTINUES TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF POWER OUTAGES.

(6) PRESSING ON WITHOUT THE GHOSTBUSTERS, THE DICKS CORRUPT THE CORE SO MUCH THE GALAXY STARTS TO COLLAPSE ON ITSELF! EVERYONE AND EVERYTHIGN THERE BY THE END OF THE TURN AFTER NEXT IS FUCKED.

(2) I WOULD HAVE SPARED THE GANG, BUT THE SUCK IN STRONG IN THESE ONES.

(999vs999) THE BATTLE RAGES ON. UNABLE TO CLAIM A ADVANTAGE, ARMOK SUMMONS THE MIGHTIEST WARRIORS IN DWARF KIND, WITH THE EMPEROR DOING LIKEWISE. SOON, THE BATTLE HAS WIPED OUT ALL LIFE EXCEPT A FEW SCATTERED AND SCARRED COMMUNITIES, NO ONE BEING ABLE TO BE BORN IN TH EFACE OF SUCH DEATH, NO ONE BEING ABLE TO DIE WITHOUT ARMOK TO CLAIM THEIR SOUL. GHOSTS HAUNT THE FEW LIVING AS THE PLANET BECOMES BUT A ENDLESS BATTLE-GROUND.

(6) LUIGI GETS LUCKY! BUT HE FOGOT A CONDOM. UH-OH.

(4vs1) CASSANDRA'S FLEET ARRIVES, AND QUICKLY TURNS THE TIDE AGAINST THE UNPREPARED PHALLIC HORDE. SHE IS BEGGINING TO RECLAIM LOST TERRITORY! NOT THAT IT WILL EXIST IT 2 TURNS.
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Xantalos

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #289 on: December 10, 2012, 12:55:09 am »

ARE EMPRAH AND ARMOK STILL ALIVE? IF SO, CONVINCE THEM WITH EPIC SPEECH TO KILL EVERYONE ELSE BUT ME. IF NOT, RECREATE THEM, AND CONVINCE THEM WITH EPIC SPEECH TO KILL EVERYONE ELSE BUT ME.
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XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #290 on: December 10, 2012, 07:46:22 am »

USE SOL SLAYERS ON TAVIK TOTH.
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Tavik Toth

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #291 on: December 10, 2012, 11:55:08 am »

IN DIFFERENT UNIVERSE.
STOP SOL SLAYERS ANYWAY.
THEN HAVE INNERSPHERE ALLIANCE GET OLD TERRITORY OF UNIVERSAL ALLIANCE.
THEN DESTROY PHALIC ARMY WHITH GHOST DIVISIONS HELP IF THEY WANT.
AND REVIVE EARTH. AND MAKE IT INVINCIBLE.
« Last Edit: December 10, 2012, 05:19:03 pm by Tavik Toth »
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Zanzetkuken The Great

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #292 on: December 10, 2012, 01:07:22 pm »

>Become a Doctor Who time lord.
>Name self: The Doctor.
>Regenerate into a different form to heal.
>Get sonic screwdriver.
>Assist in destroying Phalic army.
>Travel forwards in time.
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Quote from: Eric Blank
It's Zanzetkuken The Great. He's a goddamn wizard-dragon. He will make it so, and it will forever be.
Quote from: 2016 Election IRC
<DozebomLolumzalis> you filthy god-damn ninja wizard dragon

Cassandra

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #293 on: December 10, 2012, 01:30:19 pm »

If it's going to be destroyed anyway...

Strip mine the rest of Andromeda for resources. Absorb more planets to power the fleets. Send more fleets to reinforce the one fighting the Phalli. Have the rest, after the stripmining is done, prepare for evacuations.
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Cassandra likes elves for their taste, Cobalt for it's pretty colors, and kittens for their cute intentions. She is incredibly strong, but horribly unlucky, and speaks with a rasping accent. She is white with black eyes. She likes dwarves for their hilarious intentions.

"The fuck do you mean by 'plot'"

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #294 on: December 10, 2012, 05:14:47 pm »

USE SOL SLAYERS ON TAVIK TOTH.
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TCM

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #295 on: December 10, 2012, 05:27:56 pm »

DESTROY THE DOCTOR AND HIS TARDIS

BREAK CORAI'S CHINA BEFORE IT REACHES YOINK AND THEN HIT HIM IN THE FACE WITH A CROWBAR

SUMMON NEW, BETTER TRAINED AND EQUIPED NPC GANG

& SUMMON NPC SNIPER TO TAKE OUT OTHER PLAYERS

WHILST SODOMIZING CASSANDRA AGAIN
« Last Edit: December 10, 2012, 08:57:16 pm by TCM »
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Spinal_Taper

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #296 on: December 10, 2012, 06:26:20 pm »

End of the world jersey party. We stand around the core, ensuring that none shall stop us.

Yolo.
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Corai

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #297 on: December 10, 2012, 08:49:00 pm »

SEND LETTER TO TCM ASKING WHY HE ATTACKS ME DESPITE ME AIDING HIM.

EXPAND TO OTHER PLANETS.

SEND MORE FINE CHINA TO YOINK.
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Jeykab/Bee: how the fuck do you live your daily life corai
Jeykab/Bee: you seem like the person who constantly has mini heart attacks because cuuuute

misko27

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #298 on: December 11, 2012, 12:44:47 am »

Turn 19: Where the regular turn writer guy quits.
ARE EMPRAH AND ARMOK STILL ALIVE? IF SO, CONVINCE THEM WITH EPIC SPEECH TO KILL EVERYONE ELSE BUT ME. IF NOT, RECREATE THEM, AND CONVINCE THEM WITH EPIC SPEECH TO KILL EVERYONE ELSE BUT ME.
(5) OMNIPOTENT EQUALLY POWERFUL BEINGS AREN'T VERY GOOD AT KILLING EACH OTHER. (5vs999,999) THEY ARE GOOD AT FLIPPING YOU OFF THOUGH. I GUEsS THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PLAY WITH FORCES BEYOND YOUR CONTROL! [/moral of story]

USE SOL SLAYERS ON TAVIK TOTH.
(5) CAPTAIN OVERKILL HAS RETURNED! (5) YOU DE-ATOMIZE HIM TO THE POINT THAT CONWAY'S GAME OF LIFE IS MORE COMPLICATED THEN HE IS.

IN DIFFERENT UNIVERSE.
STOP SOL SLAYERS ANYWAY.
THEN HAVE INNERSPHERE ALLIANCE GET OLD TERRITORY OF UNIVERSAL ALLIANCE.
THEN DESTROY PHALIC ARMY WHITH GHOST DIVISIONS HELP IF THEY WANT.
AND REVIVE EARTH. AND MAKE IT INVINCIBLE.
(5vs1000) OH FUCK, I'M NOT GOING INTO THIS WHOLE TEMPORAL/SPATIAL WARFARE CRAP. GO PLAY ACHRON IF YOU GET YOUR KICKS FROM THAT. (5) YOU SICKO. (2vs3) THE PARTYING PHALLI ARE A SURPRISINGLY EFFECTIVE OPPONENT FOR YOUR FORCES.(5) EARTH NEVER DIED THOUGH.

>Become a Doctor Who time lord.
>Name self: The Doctor.
>Regenerate into a different form to heal.
>Get sonic screwdriver.
>Assist in destroying Phalic army.
>Travel forwards in time.
(5vs1000) SERIOUSLY, PLAY ACHRON. IT'S AWESOME. AND THEY APPRECIATE THIS FAR MORE THEN I DO. (5) I ACCEPT YOUR RENAMING NONETHELESS. (5) YOU REGENERATE INTO, YOUR MOM!. HAHA, NO. YOU REGENERATE INTO A KOBOLD. (5) I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS. (5vs1) YOUR TIME-TRAVELING CAPABLILITIES ALLOW YOU TO DEFEAT THEIR FORCES WITH EASE. ALSO THEY'RE MOSTLY PRETTY DAMN DRUNK.

If it's going to be destroyed anyway...

Strip mine the rest of Andromeda for resources. Absorb more planets to power the fleets. Send more fleets to reinforce the one fighting the Phalli. Have the rest, after the stripmining is done, prepare for evacuations.
(5) NOT UNLES YOU SAVE IT, BUT WHAT'S THE FUN INTHAT? (5) DRILLING DRILLING DRILLING NOW, OH YOU KNOW I JUST GOT TO KEEP ON DRILLING, (FOR MORE OIL! METAL!) (5) SURE. ANDROMEDA'S LOOKING LIKE A PRETTY CRAPPY PLACE TO LIVE NOW ANYWAY. wHAT WITH ALL THE PHALLI, AND THE EXPLOSIONS, AND THE TOXIC POLLUTION BLOCLING SECTIONS OF SPACE, ALL THAT FUN STUFF. (5) YOU PREPARE TO BEGIN EVVACUATIONS. YOU HAVE NOW ONE TURN TO EVACUATE YOUR ENTIRE POPULATION AND INFRASTRUCTURE. NO RUSH.

DESTROY THE DOCTOR AND HIS TARDIS

BREAK CORAI'S CHINA BEFORE IT REACHES YOINK AND THEN HIT HIM IN THE FACE WITH A CROWBAR

SUMMON NEW, BETTER TRAINED AND EQUIPED NPC GANG

& SUMMON NPC SNIPER TO TAKE OUT OTHER PLAYERS

WHILST SODOMIZING CASSANDRA AGAIN

(5) HE EXPLODES. THE CHANGE IN HIS BOOTH FALLS DOWN. DAMN, THERE'S GOT TO BE AT LEAST SEVEN DOLLARS WORTH OF LOOSE CHANGE HERE! (5) BROKE CHOKE THE BLOKE AND HIS CHINESE GIFTS. (5) HOPEFULLY MORE COMPETENT GANG AND SNIPER. (5)NEW RULE. I RETRACT MY PREVIOUS STATEMENT PLEASE BE VAGUE WHEN DESCRIBING YOUR SEXUAL FEATS.

End of the world jersey party. We stand around the core, ensuring that none shall stop us.

Yolo.

(5) TOGA! TOGA! TOGA! EVEN IF YOU ACTUALLY LIVE MUTIPLE TIMES, AND SINCE EVERYONE IS A GHOST, HAS BY DEFINITION ALREADY LIVED ONCE. n00b.

USE SOL SLAYERS ON TAVIK TOTH.
(5) CAPTAIN OVERKILL, DOES IT AGAIN!

SEND LETTER TO TCM ASKING WHY HE ATTACKS ME DESPITE ME AIDING HIM.

EXPAND TO OTHER PLANETS.

SEND MORE FINE CHINA TO YOINK.

(5) BECAUSE HE HATES YOU, WHY THAT NO CLEAR? (5) YOUR FORCES SPREAD ALL OVER THE QUADRANT. (5) CHINESE PORCLEIN SENT.

NPCS

(3) THE ARESIA EXPORT SOME OF THEIR TECH TO OTHER CITIES, TAKES A WHILE THOUGH.

(5) THE GHOST DIVISION CONTINUES TAKING PLANETS, REALIZES THE GALAXY IS COLLAPSING, AN DGETS THE FUCK OUT OF THERE, DETONATING BOMBS TO TROLL THE PHALLI AS THEY LEAVE.

(2) VIRUS  INCREASES INCUBATION TIME. NOW OUTBREAK SLOWER.

(4) THE PHALLI GET REALLY SLOBBERING DRUNK. BEER EVERYWHERE. HUMPING, ITS A MADHOUSE.

(999vs999) LIFE IS NOW ALL BUT EXTINGUISHED. EVEN THE DEMONS OF THIS WORLD HAVE FLED HELL, KNOWING THEY ARE SCREWED IF THEY STAY. THE DWARVES AND OTHER RACES LIVE UNDERGROUND, EKEING OUT A MISERABLE EXISTANCE. THE BATTLE CONTINUES. SOON, THE WORLD ITSELF IS USED AS A WEAPON, STARTING AS ARMOK RIPS A HILL OFF AND FLINGS IT. SOON THE CRATERED LAND IS ITSELF CEASIGN TO EXIST, AND THE BATTLE DIGS IT'S WAY THROUGH THE EARTH, THE LAST OF THE CIVS PRAY. ARMOK GETS DEEP ENOUGH TO GRAB GLOBULES OF MAGMA, FASHOINING A SWORD FROM THE FROZEN BLOOD OF THE EARTH. EMPRAH FASHOINS A SWORD FROM THE TEARS AND BONES OF THOSE FALLEN IN THIS COMBAT. THEY WAIT, AND EMPRAH CHARGES FIRST. THEY RUN AT EACH OTHER, SWORDS HELD HIGH, RAGE BEYOND ALL COMPREHENSION IN THEIR EYES.

(2) SHE IS PREGNANT, THAT'S FOR SURE. (3) LUIGI GET A FEW LEADS FOR A JOB TO SUPPORT HIS FAMILY, BUT NONE TAKE HIM YET.

(3) CASSANDRA'S FLEET RUNS LIKE A LITTLE BABY, TAKING A FEW CIVILIANS IN THEIR PATH BUT BY AND LARGE ABANDONING ANDROMEDA.

THE GANG (5) BEATS UP THE COPS AND FORMER GANG WHICH HURT THEM THE FIRST TIME. THEN THEY TAKE THEIR STUFF,AND HAEV SEX WITH THEIR GIRLFRIENDS.

THE SNIPER (2) ATTACKS YOINK! (3vs5) YOINK NINJA FLIPS THOUGH. DID YOINK JUST OUTSMART BULLET?
« Last Edit: December 11, 2012, 12:58:21 am by misko27 »
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misko27

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Re: THE RETURN OF YOU ALWAYS ROLL FIVE. 101% QUOTE PYRAMID FREE
« Reply #299 on: December 11, 2012, 12:45:14 am »

OH CRAP, I FORGOT NPCS. GIVE ME A MINUTE.
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