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Author Topic: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons  (Read 33591 times)

Cassandra

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #150 on: November 06, 2012, 06:24:29 pm »

"Eat some salmon, while we're at it."
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Cassandra likes elves for their taste, Cobalt for it's pretty colors, and kittens for their cute intentions. She is incredibly strong, but horribly unlucky, and speaks with a rasping accent. She is white with black eyes. She likes dwarves for their hilarious intentions.

"The fuck do you mean by 'plot'"

misko27

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #151 on: November 06, 2012, 06:30:22 pm »

I WANT MY CHICKEN
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

Teneb

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #152 on: November 06, 2012, 07:12:53 pm »

Place mustard on chicken. Eat chicken. Hot chocolate is not unholy enough. That is to say, it is not unholy at all.
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Monstrous Manual: D&D in DF
Quote from: Tack
What if “slammed in the ass by dead philosophers” is actually the thing which will progress our culture to the next step?

Thecard

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #153 on: November 06, 2012, 07:19:23 pm »

Pour Ranch and mustard in hot chocolate.  Dunk chicken in.  Thoroughly salt chicken.  Then eat.
Logged

I think the slaughter part is what made them angry.
OOC: Dachshundofdoom: This is how the world ends, not with a bang but with goddamn VUVUZELAS.
Those hookers aren't getting out any time soon, no matter how many fancy gadgets they have :v

Cassandra

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #154 on: November 06, 2012, 07:23:34 pm »

"Hey, while we're at the computer... Search for Lamia rituals!"
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Cassandra likes elves for their taste, Cobalt for it's pretty colors, and kittens for their cute intentions. She is incredibly strong, but horribly unlucky, and speaks with a rasping accent. She is white with black eyes. She likes dwarves for their hilarious intentions.

"The fuck do you mean by 'plot'"

Fniff

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #155 on: November 06, 2012, 07:37:17 pm »

You sigh and search up the local news. The plague doesn't seem to have been spotted yet, possibly because everyone's still suspicious of zombie stories after that whole Florida fiasco. Maybe that was caused by demons and it was a cover up? Then again, probably not, since these demons just want to eat stupid combinations of food that would make you vomit if you ate them and didn't have seventeen stomaches. You then search up "Lamia rituals", not exactly sure what you're going to find. You find a site about the occult noting ways to summon a lamia. Mythically, of course, because lamias don't exist. Apparently a good way is to get a snake's egg, crack it open and feed it to a female virgin, which will cause a fetal lamia spirit to "Infect" the virgin. Not really sure what that's meant to entail, but you don't think it will look pleasant. You didn't know lamias even were spirits.

You do actually know a virgin, but she's in another town and you'd have to take a bus to get there, since you have no car. Well, anyway, you have to go to bed soon.

"Alright, guys, I'm not going to eat your stupid food, I'm going to go to bed. Because I sleep." you turn off the computer and stand up, wandering to your bed, and flopping down into it, stripping off your clothes. You crawl under the bedsheets and fall into a deep, dreamless sleep.

When you wake up, the dawn light is coming through the window. You wonder what you should do today.

Cassandra

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #156 on: November 06, 2012, 07:45:27 pm »

"Perfect.... Just what we need. Loyal dependable minions that AREN'T other demons... Oh, you're awake? Good! Take us to a place where we can get a car..."
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Cassandra likes elves for their taste, Cobalt for it's pretty colors, and kittens for their cute intentions. She is incredibly strong, but horribly unlucky, and speaks with a rasping accent. She is white with black eyes. She likes dwarves for their hilarious intentions.

"The fuck do you mean by 'plot'"

Jellycat12

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #157 on: November 06, 2012, 07:49:37 pm »

Yes. A car. Get one.
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misko27

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #158 on: November 06, 2012, 07:51:26 pm »

If you don't eat some chicken I shall curse you with never-ending crotch rash, now EAT IT.
« Last Edit: November 06, 2012, 08:19:01 pm by misko27 »
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The Age of Man is over. It is the Fire's turn now

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #159 on: November 06, 2012, 08:13:20 pm »

Once you eat the chicken or prepare for crotch rash, check the news. See if anyone has noticed the murderous guy yet.
Oh, and can you pick something you don't mind us destroying?
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[GreatWyrmGold] gets a little crown. May it forever be his mark of Cain; let no one argue pointless subjects with him lest they receive the same.

Teneb

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #160 on: November 06, 2012, 08:20:54 pm »

Before any of that, search on the internet for a spell that causes the target to dance.
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Monstrous Manual: D&D in DF
Quote from: Tack
What if “slammed in the ass by dead philosophers” is actually the thing which will progress our culture to the next step?

SomeStupidGuy

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #161 on: November 06, 2012, 08:37:19 pm »

You're a dick.
You're just being contrary, man. Just have a little bit of booze.
Also, let's go learn about ancient evils and stuff at our local library.
« Last Edit: November 06, 2012, 09:33:40 pm by SomeStupidGuy »
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Your favorite pinko progressive nerd-gal. Probably.

Thecard

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #162 on: November 06, 2012, 09:32:08 pm »

Guys, guys, I know why he isn't eating our food for us.
He's not drunk yet!
DRINK, PUPPET.  DRINK.
Logged

I think the slaughter part is what made them angry.
OOC: Dachshundofdoom: This is how the world ends, not with a bang but with goddamn VUVUZELAS.
Those hookers aren't getting out any time soon, no matter how many fancy gadgets they have :v

Xantalos

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #163 on: November 06, 2012, 09:40:32 pm »

You're a dick.
You're just being contrary, man. Just have a little bit of booze.
Also, let's go learn about ancient evils and stuff at our local library.

Ignore this imp's first command. But you will learn about various types of demons, spells, and other arcane parapenelia. Then focus on getting a car for that virgin.
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Sig! Onol
Quote from: BFEL
XANTALOS, THE KARATEBOMINATION
Quote from: Toaster
((The Xantalos Die: [1, 1, 1, 6, 6, 6]))

SomeStupidGuy

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Re: You Are The Vessel For Horrific Demons
« Reply #164 on: November 06, 2012, 09:43:03 pm »

You're a dick.
You're just being contrary, man. Just have a little bit of booze.
Also, let's go learn about ancient evils and stuff at our local library.

Ignore this imp's first command. But you will learn about various types of demons, spells, and other arcane parapenelia. Then focus on getting a car for that virgin.
Hey! I'm not an imp, I'm obviously an arch-vile. Those ones are higher up than imps, right? Anyways, Terry will be more... agreeable while liquored up.
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Your favorite pinko progressive nerd-gal. Probably.
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