On the road back to Bernie's place...
The statue would definitely kill both Alaric and his companion if given half the chance! Alaric, utilizing a time-honored strategy, attempts to bluff his way out!
[Bluff roll: 6]
"It is the will of Narcillicus himself that we pass on to the Temple of Beauty to induct this mortal into a higher echelon of being! The high priest of the temple will perform the procedure himself!"
"Ascension, fuck yeah!"
The statue appears to consider these statements.
"SO, YOU ARE A SERVANT OF THE GODS?"
"Indeed I am! You would do well to listen to what I've said!"
"THAT'S WONDERFUL."
He lifts off the ground!
"I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO KILL A GOD. I SUPPOSE I WILL HAVE TO SETTLE FOR A MINION. FOR NOW."
"Kick his fuckin' ass, god-spirit!"
Inside the Magical Zoology Department...
James stands around practicing his smugness while the chimp keeps brutalizing the hare!
[Chimp idea roll: 4]
It goes in for the kill!
[Heavily Armed Chimp vs. Hare: 4+3 vs. 1-2]
The chimp, despite the whole thing being splitting hares by this point, turns the hare into a neatly sliced pile of organs! The hare turns into ash! Still not conclusive proof on whether diablerie works, though. James applauds the chimp's great work!
[Chimp idea roll: 1]
The chimp takes this for a challenge for pack superiority and pounces on James!
[Heavily Armed Chimp vs. James: 5+3 vs. 2]
Maybe it wasn't the best idea to let an ape with barely-restrained instincts keep no fewer than six sharp instruments in its hands! The ape, bolstered by its previous knife-fighting experience, slices at James until the poor fellow's abdominal cavity is entirely hollow! That done, the ape kicks James into a corner! That'll teach him to challenge it!
[James will roll: 6]
James, however, hardly notices the lack of a chest and keeps behaving completely normally! Mostly because he's too busy punching the horrible thoughts of death right out of himself! Admittedly, it works perfectly! James' face is slightly beaten up, though.
James resolves to put this incident behind him and not try to kill the ape, for that might end very badly for him. He looks for some zoologists!
[Search roll: 1]
He manages to trip and fall through a particularly precarious patch in the wooden floor, landing on a soft bale of hay. That pokes at his insides. Ouch.
Outside the Metamorphosis Department...
Jordan has no recourse but a most ungentlemanly action: asking for help!
[Attention attraction roll: 6]
"I SAY, WOULD ANYONE CARE TO HELP A VICTIM OF AN ELEPHANT TRAMPLING WITH FOUR WIVES AND A KID?"
[Attracted people roll: 1]
"I say, what a fascinating individual! There's a sword in his belly, all of his limbs are broken, he has no heart, and yet he lives! Perhaps he will make for a fine test subject!"
He is claimed by a strange-looking man coming out of the Metamorphosis Department! He is carried through some halls, shown to various people and bragged about, then placed on a table!
"Let's see what we can do with you, good chap!"
[Magic roll: 6-1]
Jordan's limbs become unbroken once more! Hooray!
"Oh, how droll. I was expecting something more interesting. Let's try again, shall we?"
[Magic roll: 2-1]
Jordan's left arm reshapes itself into a giant flesh-pretzel of some kind! It is entirely possible that it is salted!
[Magic roll: 1-1]
Jordan's right leg turns into a barking dog, attached to the hip where its two hindlegs should be!
"Hee hee, beautiful! It is not very often that I get willing test subjects! They wouldn't give me any! Said I was senile or something! What foolishness!"
[Magic roll: 4-1]
Jordan's left leg leg turns into a wooden club!
[Magic roll: 6-1]
Jordan's right arm becomes better than ever, covering itself with flexible metal plates!
"There you go, dearie! I hope you enjoyed it half as much as I did!"
[Reaction roll: 4]
The mage puts Jordan in a cart and wheels him out of the building, dumping him on the cobblestones! Before Jordan can say anything, the mage disappears!
In a ditch somewhere...
Leon attempts to straighten out his bent limbs!
[Strength roll: 3+1]
He makes his legs roughly straight once more and bends his arms out of their knotted positions, getting them about halfway there until being unable progress any further! His arms are now only somewhat oddly bent and his legs are mostly straight!
Inside an oddly battle-ready monastery...
Vincent tries to follow the knight out of the room!
[Search roll: 5]
He quickly catches up to her and attempts to filch the goblet!
[Pickpocketing roll: 1]
As soon as he reaches for the goblet, the woman swings at him with a warhammer!
[Knight Sister vs. Vincent: 3+2 vs. 5+1]
Vincent easily dodges the swing, though, and retreats away, the woman following him!
[Escape roll: 1]
However, Vincent takes a wrong turn and is cornered by the knight in a storeroom!
[Alarm roll: 6]
Nobody else seems to be around, though! That's good!
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Topic: Life Begins At Death - Epilogue: We Live And Live Again (Read 557068 times)