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Author Topic: Life Begins At Death - Epilogue: We Live And Live Again  (Read 564929 times)

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1635 on: December 08, 2012, 08:19:55 am »

On the road to Lake Victory...

Maps strolls along, choosing to circle the vile sticky part of the woods. Can't be anything good there, he thinks.

[Island perception roll: 1]

The island begins to take off slowly, floating away from the area! Good riddance, Maps thinks! He continues on through the woods!

[Encounter roll: 1-1]

As he's slowly, but surely moving along, he is suddenly interrupted by something descending from the heavens! It looks like a golden elephant! On fire!

[Elephant landing roll: 3]

It lands some thirty feet away from Maps, blasting him off into the woods!

[Maps flight roll: 1-1]

He lands in a pile of leaves! Spot of good luck, that.

That is, that's what Maps would have thought had the ground not immediately crumbled beneath him! He falls!

[Maps fall roll: 3-1]

He falls for a while, soon losing sight of the sunlight and landing on some soft, warm granite!

[Maps fall damage roll: 4]

His vast quantities of snail tissue shield him from the worst of the punishment one would normally receive after such a fall! He only breaks a leg! Not like he was particularly using those, anyway.

He seems to be down under now. Deep down under. Luckily, he has a divine glowing stomach to help him see his way around! Thanks, Pacitarius!
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1636 on: December 08, 2012, 08:20:54 am »

((Tim doesn't have the teleport box. Let's hope Maps somehow finds a curious box.))
((So, i guess Ted was owned too. The Demon of Light... Probably my next destination. Mayby he can unbind my soul and give me a new jar.))
Mike will search the woman's mind for any info about this Demon of Light.
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

TopHat

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1637 on: December 08, 2012, 08:31:03 am »

((He doesn't have to. Bernie gave him a box.))
Remember how to cast life magic, heal leg!
Then figure out a way to get out.


((at least 'Maps' gets his +1 for not being in sunlight now...))
« Last Edit: December 08, 2012, 08:33:01 am by TopHat »
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I would ask why fire can burn two men to death without getting hot enough to burn a book, but then I read "INEXTINGUISHABLE RUNNING KAMIKAZE RADIOACTIVE FLAMING ZOMBIE" and realized that logic, reason, and physics are all occupied with crying in the corner right now.

miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1638 on: December 08, 2012, 08:32:20 am »

((No, Bernie gave monty a box, and later he gave James a box. He even said "I only have two"))
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

TopHat

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1639 on: December 08, 2012, 08:34:26 am »

((exactly. Maps=James, so Maps already has the box. He doesn't have to look for it.
(although he's probably forgotten what it does.)))
Logged
I would ask why fire can burn two men to death without getting hot enough to burn a book, but then I read "INEXTINGUISHABLE RUNNING KAMIKAZE RADIOACTIVE FLAMING ZOMBIE" and realized that logic, reason, and physics are all occupied with crying in the corner right now.

miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1640 on: December 08, 2012, 08:35:28 am »

((Oh, I tought you were talking about Tim.))
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Yoink

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1641 on: December 08, 2012, 08:54:35 am »

"Oh, sorries!"
Timothy coughed, genuinely upset as he assumed a less frightful expression. "I not mean to scares you! Wants make friends! I is Timothy, I got real good job for youse if you wants! Dis not look real fun, sittin' down here all the times. Come wif me an' we has excitement, adventures, good food an' stuff, lotsa new friends and yeah! You all looks like real good scary-crows, be easy for youse!"

He raised his hands and grinned happily. "Who's wif me? It be opportunity of a lifetime!"
The irony of that last sentence coming from a ghost was completely lost on Timothy.

>Convince at least one scarecrow to accompany me back to Bob for an exciting new career and seachange!

>Oh, and introduce myself!
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Booze is Life for Yoink

To deprive him of Drink is to steal divinity from God.
you need to reconsider your life
If there's any cause worth dying for, it's memes.

Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1642 on: December 08, 2012, 09:49:07 am »

Inside a diseased mind...

Mike scans the woman's mind for any knowledge of the Demon of Light!

[Woman knowledge roll: 5]

~The Demon of Light is a powerful creature that dwells in its own dimension, surrounded by minions of pure light. The Demon of Light can be summoned when a certain text, which I happen to have memorized, is spoken to a properly prepared door, provided that a proper offering (a piece of lead glass) is offered. The Demon of Light is frequently sought after by those that seek to build phylacteries for themselves, as it has developed many soul magic techniques to this end.~

How informative! This Demon of Light fellow seems pretty great!


Deep down underground...

Maps tries to remember how to use that spellboook he seems to have!

[Memory roll: 6]

Yeah, it's all coming back to him now! Healing magic away!

[Magic roll: 4-1]

He manages to make his leg not hurt anymore! You know, he might actually be able to survive this! Time to look around for a way out!

[Exploration roll: 1]

He is just about to roll out when he feels the ground beneath his body shake and move! Uh oh. The floor beneath him gives way and the poor schmuck plummets even lower!

[Plummeting roll: 1]

He falls for what seems like forever, and lands inside a crack in some ancient stone! He is at least two miles beneath the earth now!

[Fall damage roll: 2+1-1]

He shatters both his legs to the point of uselessness and manages to obliterate a large chunk of his muscle mass!

[Will roll: 6+1]

He remains conscious! Very conscious. In horrible pain, and painfully conscious of it.


In the lair of the Scary-crows...

Timothy remembers his manners!

"Oh, sorries! I not mean to scares you! Wants make friends! I is Timothy, I got real good job for youse if you wants!

[Citizen Lou reaction roll: 6]

"MAY I BE THE FIRST TO WELCOME YOU TO THE MAGNIFICENT STATE OF THE STRAW PEOPLE, NON-CITIZEN TIMOTHY! I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR STAY HERE! IN FACT, I WILL GIVE YOU AUTHORIZED ACCESS TO THE BURIED INN AS A CONGRATULATORY GESTURE!"

Ooh, a congratulatory gesture! Better counter that with a job offer! These straw people do look awfully impressionable!

Dis not look real fun, sittin' down here all the times. Come wif me an' we has excitement, adventures, good food an' stuff, lotsa new friends and yeah! You all looks like real good scary-crows, be easy for youse! Who's wif me? It be opportunity of a lifetime!"

[Citizen Lou reaction roll: 1]
[Scary-crow cadet reaction roll: 3]

Citizen Lou's expression immediately changes! It appears that Timothy has committed a bit of a faux pas! However, the other scary-crows around here seem to be not entirely uninterested!

"YOU ARE HERE TO ENSLAVE US, SURFACE IMPERIALIST, I CAN SENSE IT IN YOUR JOB OFFER! YOU SAY THAT WE WILL HAVE EXCITEMENT, BUT YOU MEAN FOR US TO  BE ENSLAVED TO WATCH AN ORCHARD! I JUST KNOW IT! YOU SURFACE SLAVEMASTERS ARE ALL ALIKE!"

[Scary-crow cadet interest roll: 5]

"WE SHALL SEIZE HIM AND DELIVER HIM TO THE EXECUTION CHAMBER AT ONCE, CITIZEN LOUIS!"

"DO IT, CADET FRED! DO NOT DISAPPOINT ME!"

Three cadets lead Timothy away from the angered Lou! They whisper in his ear!

"Take us out of here, please! That old bastard is absolutely unbearable!"
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1643 on: December 08, 2012, 10:28:12 am »

Mike will find out what the text is and what one has to do to make a door "properly prepared".

((I AINT GOIN DOWN ANYTIME SOON.))
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Harry Baldman

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  • What do I care for your suffering?
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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1644 on: December 08, 2012, 10:51:38 am »

In the mind of a woman...

Mike tries to memorize the proper demon-summoning text as well!

[Memorization roll: 3]

It's a bit long, sure, but he can remember it - it mostly sounds like gibberish, but the words supposedly have deep, layered meanings to them that mere mortals cannot comprehend. He also tries to learn the proper protocol for preparing a door for a demon's entrance!

[Learning roll: 1]

He manages to fall asleep from the lecture! Despite not really being able to sleep! Oh dear. Seems like the woman's mind has taken offense. Mike doesn't think it will be as forthcoming with information anymore!
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1645 on: December 08, 2012, 11:48:37 am »

Mike will resist, and push back the woman!
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Caerwyn

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1646 on: December 08, 2012, 11:48:46 am »

S-s-s-Sam is DEAD?

Sam will try and give someone stomach cramps and/or bad dreams with negative thoughts!
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Harry Baldman

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1647 on: December 08, 2012, 12:59:04 pm »

Inside an insulted woman's mind...

Mike tries to take control of the woman's mind!

[Mike will roll: 3]

He gains control of her right hand! Hooray for Mike!

"Oh my. Something's happening to me."

[Woman perception roll: 1]

"Eh. Probably nothing."

She goes back to one of the crates which seems to have survived the destruction of the room and opens it!

[Crate contents roll: 3]

It has an odd-looking object in it! A large sphere with five nails sticking out of it!


In the King's court...

Samuel, bored with his new position as Demonic Keeper of the Servants' Quarters, decides to give someone stomach cramps or bad dreams!

[Prank roll: 3]

He gives the servants extra rations today! Maybe they'll overeat and experience both of those if he's lucky!

A voice comes from the throne room!

"Stop goofing off, minion! I can see you back there! Do that again and you'll be demoted!"

Samuel sighs. It's going to be a long eternity here at the castle.

Spoiler: GM Note (click to show/hide)
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miauw62

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Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1648 on: December 08, 2012, 01:02:33 pm »

((Wait. How did Sam end up being soulbound by something that's not Bernie?))
Mike will use this new insight to push back her subconcious, so he can freely search her memories and knowledge.
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Quote from: NW_Kohaku
they wouldn't be able to tell the difference between the raving confessions of a mass murdering cannibal from a recipe to bake a pie.
Knowing Belgium, everyone will vote for themselves out of mistrust for anyone else, and some kind of weird direct democracy coalition will need to be formed from 11 million or so individuals.

Caerwyn

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    • View Profile
Re: Life Begins At Death - Chapter 3: Stealing Better Minions!
« Reply #1649 on: December 08, 2012, 01:11:43 pm »

Well, that was DEFINITELY the most fun I have EVER had in an RTD. Thanks, Hairy. Remember, Miauw? I sold my soul, or whatever was left of it. Now I'm stuck in the after-realm...

Darn. I'm going to miss this RTD.
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