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Author Topic: How to get rid of children.  (Read 1940 times)

epicotep

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How to get rid of children.
« on: October 21, 2012, 04:28:39 am »

I went from 15 dwarfs to 74 from one migrant wave and I got 34 children. Im wondering is there any way I can "get rid" of them because I cant feed them.

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AutomataKittay

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #1 on: October 21, 2012, 05:14:04 am »

Build an atomsmasher next to a wall, make sure it's out of sight of everyone else. Designate it to be deconstructed, wait for a child to come to do it. If an adult does it, undesignate it and wait a bit, then try again. When one does shows up on the atomsmasher, pull the lever, splat. Keeping them out of sight when it happens reduces the upset and death down to missing person. Also, have a lot of slabs!

Though, why can't you feed them? I see a lot of farmers, have them work plump helmet nonstop on big plots.
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epicotep

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #2 on: October 21, 2012, 05:30:39 am »

brand new fortress that's why and they are already in my fort =/
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Nyan Thousand

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2012, 06:43:04 am »

Only in Dwarf Fortress will you see the topic "how to get rid of children" not end up terribly.

That said, designate a burrow for your unwanted childrens under an atomsmasher, and smash away. For bonus points, have a lot of statues and nice shit, and keep your military nearby. The death will upset them (which is why you'll need the statues) and it should also desensitize them, thus making them much more effective with the business of the day (i.e., killing)
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Azated

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #4 on: October 21, 2012, 07:20:01 am »

Only in Dwarf Fortress will you see the topic "how to get rid of children" not end up terribly.

That said, designate a burrow for your unwanted childrens under an atomsmasher, and smash away. For bonus points, have a lot of statues and nice shit, and keep your military nearby. The death will upset them (which is why you'll need the statues) and it should also desensitize them, thus making them much more effective with the business of the day (i.e., killing)

And also cause a tantrum spiral from the parents grief once the military telepathically informs them that Little Jimmy was just splattered by a drawbridge.
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Then it happened. Then I cringed. Then I picked it up and beat him to death with it, and then his buddies, too.
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epicotep

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #5 on: October 21, 2012, 07:39:44 am »

lol I really love the community of Dwarf Fortress so help full.
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Helgoland

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #6 on: October 21, 2012, 11:16:12 am »

Only in Dwarf Fortress will you see the topic "how to get rid of children" not end up terribly.

That said, designate a burrow for your unwanted childrens under an atomsmasher, and smash away. For bonus points, have a lot of statues and nice shit, and keep your military nearby. The death will upset them (which is why you'll need the statues) and it should also desensitize them, thus making them much more effective with the business of the day (i.e., killing)

And also cause a tantrum spiral from the parents grief once the military telepathically informs them that Little Jimmy was just splattered by a drawbridge.
Naah, a "missing" child is not something they have a problem with. I guess they always tantrum because of the burial costs :D
« Last Edit: October 21, 2012, 04:07:17 pm by Helgoland »
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Tofu

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #7 on: October 21, 2012, 12:39:45 pm »

It's topics like this that keep me lurking around these forums just about every day.

Although, my answer's as good as anyone else in here, really. Just throw 'em in a pit and let them starve to death? You won't have the problem of food or anything then, and at least you'll have entertaining fights.
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mister Zalli

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #8 on: October 21, 2012, 02:38:56 pm »

Make them super soldiers with right kind of child care.
Here's how: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=91093.msg2532118
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Helgoland

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #9 on: October 21, 2012, 04:08:20 pm »

Although, my answer's as good as anyone else in here, really. Just throw 'em in a pit and let them starve to death? You won't have the problem of food or anything then, and at least you'll have entertaining fights.
Naah, the children will witness all deaths but the last one, so you'll end up with tantrum spirals. Just smash them kiddies!
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The Bay12 postcard club
Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
I'm going to do the smart thing here and disengage. This isn't a hill I paticularly care to die on.

Man In Zero G

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #10 on: October 21, 2012, 04:50:52 pm »

I count 18 dwarves who's primary profession is related directly to food production. Plus a brewer and a peasant.
Seriously how can you not feed them? Sure, ok, you aren't set up for mass farming yet... it takes a long time for a dwarf to starve. More than enough time to set up some kind of farming/fishing/hunting/butchering the non-pet livestock to feed your fort. Bonus points for the fact that kids will help harvest crops if you've got "all harvest" set.

I don't know why people hate kids.
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tolkafox

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #11 on: October 21, 2012, 07:11:49 pm »

Have them explore the caverns. If that fails, have them dive for the green stuff.
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Nyan Thousand

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #12 on: October 21, 2012, 07:43:20 pm »

Only in Dwarf Fortress will you see the topic "how to get rid of children" not end up terribly.

That said, designate a burrow for your unwanted childrens under an atomsmasher, and smash away. For bonus points, have a lot of statues and nice shit, and keep your military nearby. The death will upset them (which is why you'll need the statues) and it should also desensitize them, thus making them much more effective with the business of the day (i.e., killing)

And also cause a tantrum spiral from the parents grief once the military telepathically informs them that Little Jimmy was just splattered by a drawbridge.

Shhh. You didn't have to say that. You're kind of a jerk sometimes. jk ily bro

Ok, better idea: drop them into a spike down your meeting hall. YES, everybody will see that. YES, the parents will be upset. YES, it'll be awesome. All I'm seeing here is YES, YES, YES!
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oven_baked

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #13 on: October 22, 2012, 04:10:25 pm »

Same way you get rid of anything:
Magma and Atom Smasher.
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kragnoth

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Re: How to get rid of children.
« Reply #14 on: October 22, 2012, 05:54:52 pm »

can you not force them into labor using dwarf therapist anymore?

Just make them useful, and have them haul stuff and craft mugs to earn their food.
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