EXPERIMENT ON ONE TABLE TO TRY AND CREATE RACE OF TEST SUBJECTS.
THE OTHER TABLE IS THE CONTROL GROUP.
[6]
YOU DEPLOY TRAIN HACKSAW
AFTER MUCH EXPERIMENTATION YOU DEDUCE THAT ONE TABLE CAN CREATE FOUR MUTANT OFFSPRING THAT YOU HAVE NAMED "TABLEGGIANS"
AND A LARGE FLAT BOARD
AFTER USING YOUR CUTTING LASER YOU MANAGE TO CUT A LOVELY WOODEN WHALE OUT OF THE BOARD
YET YOU FEEL UNFULFILLED
OK
IT'S TIME FOR STATUS
TABLE TOWN:IS IN HELL
RULED BY GRAKNORKE AND MISKO
KOBOLD ALLIES' LOCATION UNKNOWN
TABLE PLANET:SOME PLANET
NOT RELATED TO TABLE TOWN
KOBOLD GHETTOS:EMPTY
TUMBLEWEED VALLEY:ERASED FROM EXISTENCE
SPACE TRAIN:IS IN SPACE
LORDSLOWPOKE FIXED AND IS CAPTAIN
OBJECTIVE LIVING IN LIQUID METALLIC HYDROGEN TANK, HAS MYSTERY DIMENSION POWERS
GREATWYRMGOLD CURRENTLY CONDUCTING DIABOLICAL CARPENTRY EXPERIMENTS VIA SHIP COMPUTER
ARTIFACTS OF NOTE1000 GRAMS OF WEAPONS-GRADE
235U, CURRENTLY OWNED BY YOINK
DUTCH MINTS, ALSO OWNED BY YOINK, ARE DANGEROUSLY MINTY
TRAIN MEDALLION WITH POCKET UNIVERSE, STATUS UNKNOWN
TANKFUL OF LIQUID METALLIC HYDROGEN, VERY USEFUL
MISKO'S TABLE HAND, CAN SHOOT TABLE LASERS
STATUS OF PEOPLEYOINK: HAS RADIATION POISONING, BUT FEELS NO SYMPTOMS DUE TO EXTRA-STRONG MINTS
LORDSLOWPOKE: CAPTAIN OF SPACE TRAIN
OBJECTIVE: SQUATTER ON SPACE TRAIN, CURRENTLY RELAXING IN HARDCOAR FUSION TANK
GREATWYRMGOLD: TRAIN COMPUTER, LIKES SCIENCE
MISKO: LORD OF TABLE TOWN, HAS TABLE POWER
GRAKNORKE: LORD OF TABLE TOWN, RULES KOBOLDS
SLAYERHERO90: BUSY TRYING TO KILL SELF, CHOKED ON OWN TEETH
XANTALOS: TURNED INTO POWERPUFF GIRLS VILLAIN AND WAS NEVER SEEN AGAIN
FURTUKA: FIGHTING UNSUCCESSFUL WAR ON ZOMBIES, CANNOT REACH ESCAPE VELOCITY
ZOMBIES: VERY ZOMBIE
GOOMBAGEEK: CELEBRATING CANADIAN THANKSGIVING
LOUD WHISPERS TREE: GROWING SOMEWHERE IN HELL, DO NOT DISTURB
TABLE TASK FORCE MUST PREVENT THESE WARCRIMES FROM COMING TO PASS.
[3]
TABLE TASK FORCE LAUNCHES TABLE INTO SPACE TO RIDE MOON
TABLE BURNS UP IN ATMOSPHERE
SUMMON A COSMIC GOAT
[6]
YOU SUMMON COSMIC GOAT
COSMIC GOAT EATS COSMIC TIN CAN
DIES OF COSMIC LEAD POISONING AND COSMIC UNREALISTICOSITY
OH NO