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To poll or not to poll?

Yes
- 9 (50%)
No
- 2 (11.1%)
Maybe so
- 7 (38.9%)

Total Members Voted: 18


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Author Topic: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode  (Read 9783 times)

MrWillsauce

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #60 on: October 07, 2012, 09:47:51 am »

Use this if you want to heal your spine.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Page 68

I'm no cheat! But I can heal it legitimately by getting bitten by a werecreature, or I can just use crutches.
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MrWillsauce

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #61 on: October 07, 2012, 12:25:01 pm »

Page 68
Leaning on the shoulders of Nako and Dang, you hobble your way northeast to Storber. About halfway there, you and your companions stop on the side of a hill to eat lion meat and rest for the night. You polish off your water, but still have plenty of meat. You stop just south of the camp at a brook to drink and refill your waterskin before finishing the last stretch of the journey. As you enter the outskirts of the site, you begin crawling more slowly and stealthily, but your comrades don't appear to have any stealth abilities whatsoever and they stomp obnoxiously through the brush. You do no try to stop them; you aren't particularly attached to them and they might prove useful distractions while you silently take out the kobolds. Finally, you can tell you are at Storber by the many broken bolts scattered around and the various detached limbs. Suddenly, Nako lets out a scream, and you turn back to see her lying on the ground with a bloody bolt sticking out her leg. Then, a one-armed kobold spearman steps out of the brush to the northeast, but she doesn't appear to have seen you yet.



Dang pounces on the spearman and stabs viscously at her with her slicing knife, but the spearman retaliates and sticks her spear in Dang's arm. Dang then takes two arrows in her left leg from behind and falls to the ground, but she is still conscious and fighting. Now you can see the two kobold archers clearly to the north in the camp's booty pile. You leave you goblin comrades to fend for themselves and attempt to flank the archers from behind. Dang takes a heavy beating from the spearman and gets several more arrows stuck in her until she loses hold of her knife and finally bleeds to death. The spearman then moves to finish off Nako, and her newly-appeared swordsman bandit mate arrives to aid her. Meanwhile, the archers move closer to fire on her, but none of the kobolds have spotted you yet.



After being stabbed and shot many times, the mangled Nako finally dies when an iron spear is plunged through her head. The kobolds, apparently thinking the threat is gone, resume chatting to each other in their awful language. Occasionally, one of them says something that the others interpret to be humorous, and the group lets out a horrible hyena-like laugh. Meanwhile you creep slowly to get behind the two archers. Just as you reach a position where you can strike one of the archers, she lets out a cry and rapidly fires an arrow at you. Her comrade to the east fires too, but both arrows are blocked by your shield. From below, you swing your axe up at her (luckily kobolds are even shorter than dwarves, so you can reach) and lop off one of her arms. You strike her in the gut with the pommel of your axe before striking her in the head with its blade, killing her instantly. As the spearman and swordsman converge on your position, you crawl towards the other bowman and strike at her leg, severing it. As she falls to the ground, you bash the spearman in her stomach with the shaft of your axe before scrambling away from both of them. The swordsman steps over the bowman to get a better shot at you, but you strike at her with your pommel. The strike is parried, but it allows you to crawl further away. The bowman, despite being legless and experiencing extreme pain, fires more arrows at you from the ground. You easily block them with your shield as the spearman encroaches on you again. You swing your axe at her spear hand, cutting it off and obviously making her lose hold of her spear. An arrow hits you in the leg, lodging firmly in the wound and scraping your bone. You grit your teeth and endure the pain as you crawl towards that dastardly bowman. The swordsman crawls towards you from behind and hacks off your left leg, which still has an arrow in it. The rest is a blur to you as you are horribly mangled by the many kobolds that swarm you. You lose hold of your axe and remaining foot, and attempt to crawl away from them, but some new kobolds with functioning legs have arrived and easily keep up with you. You counterstrike them with shield bashes and bites and scratches, but do no significant damage. Eventually, you are able to roll onto your axe and take hold of it. With it, you go berserk on the kobolds and hack them apart. The healthy kobold spearman who had harassed you as you tried to flee now is crawling away from you, footless. You catch up to him and pommel him to death. You lodge the blade of your axe in the head of the bowman, killing her too. Now, all who remain are you and the spearman who took your leg, crawling towards each other. You block herstrikes with your shield and hack off her leg. You sever her other leg too, before cutting her head clean off. You hyperventilate heavily and are about to give into your pain, thinking the battle over, when you spot a one-armed bowman with a broken leg crawl towards you, apparently planning to strangle you while you were unconscious. Unable to fire on you, she crawls towards you to have a melee. You block her slashes and she parries your hacks for quite a while before you manage to whack off her other arm and she bleeds to death. Despite how desperately you want to, you do not give into your pain and fall unconscious, having learned you lesson. You have no doubt that there are other kobolds around; you haven't even caught site of the chief yet. You do not pull the arrow that is lodged in your lip; you've lost too much blood already.



Spoiler: Inventory and Status (click to show/hide)

If you...

Leave this hellhole immediately and get as far away as possible before collapsing, turn to page 69.

Try to stuff some treasure in your bag and take your companions' knives as mementos before leaving, turn to page 70.

Push yourself to the absolute limit and seek out the kobold chief with your abysmal health, turn to page 71.
« Last Edit: October 07, 2012, 06:41:36 pm by MrWillsauce »
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Tsuchigumo550

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #62 on: October 07, 2012, 02:17:21 pm »

70
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There are words that make the booze plant possible. Just not those words.
Alright you two. Attempt to murder each other. Last one standing gets to participate in the next test.
DIRK: Pelvic thrusts will be my exclamation points.

NAV

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #63 on: October 07, 2012, 02:20:51 pm »

69
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

ab00

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #64 on: October 07, 2012, 02:27:25 pm »

Page 69.
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Suicides do not count towards das Fuhrers kill score.

MrWillsauce

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #65 on: October 07, 2012, 06:40:56 pm »

Page 69
With no legs and a broken spine, you crawl your way north out of the camp, leaving behind the many bodies of your enemies and friends. You don't make it far before you pass out in a pool of your own blood. You awake about eight hours later and nearly have a heart attack when you look down to see both of your legs missing. After another hour of calming yourself down, you yank the arrow out of your face and brace your arms for the long days of crawling ahead of you in the Hell that is now your life.



Spoiler: Inventory and Status (click to show/hide)

If you...

Crawl to the human farmland to the east, turn to page 72.

Return to Sweetnessgraves, turn to page 73.

Crawl back to Storber to finish things once and for all, turn to page 74.

Crawl to the human fortress to the south, turn to page 75.

Crawl to the human settlement that you took the goblin slaves from, turn to page 76.
« Last Edit: October 08, 2012, 02:46:16 pm by MrWillsauce »
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Ship of Freaks

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #66 on: October 07, 2012, 07:00:01 pm »

page 72
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They are all one and the same. They are all Grek.

Orange Wizard

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #67 on: October 07, 2012, 07:30:47 pm »

Page 75, find a crutch.
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Please don't shitpost, it lowers the quality of discourse
Hard science is like a sword, and soft science is like fear. You can use both to equally powerful results, but even if your opponent disbelieve your stabs, they will still die.

ab00

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #68 on: October 07, 2012, 10:45:30 pm »

Page 72. There's a better chance of finding a crutch in a town.
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Suicides do not count towards das Fuhrers kill score.

NAV

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #69 on: October 08, 2012, 01:40:22 am »

74. Get your legs back, use them as bludgeons.
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Highmax…dead, flesh torn from him, though his skill with the sword was unmatched…military…Nearly destroyed .. Rhunorah... dead... Mastahcheese returns...dead. Gaul...alive, still locked in combat. NAV...Alive, drinking booze....
The face on the toaster does not look like one of mercy.

AKingsQuest

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #70 on: October 08, 2012, 05:20:22 am »

72

Broken

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #71 on: October 08, 2012, 09:26:03 am »

75. There are not crutches in hamlets, never.
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Quote
In a hole in the ground there lived a dwarf. Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat: it was a dwarf fortress, and that means magma.
Dwarf fortress: Tales of terror and inevitability

MrWillsauce

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #72 on: October 08, 2012, 02:45:05 pm »

Page 72
You crawl painstakingly to the east, swimming through one river and crossing another over a human-made bridge. Finally, you spot the first peasant shacks on the west edge of the hamlet. You pull your way across the dirt road. The human child and peasant who pass you seem to ignore you, but you do not confront them about it. You are greeted from your left by a human standing in a doorway with an iron crossbow and quiver on her back.
"Good dwarf! Please let me help you."
"I'm quite alright," you say as you pathetically crawl over to lie in front of her.
"How may I be of serv-" she pauses as she catches a better view of your face. "By the gods you can't be... the Elder Echoes of Paddling! Tales of your battle with Metalfrightful and your attack on Storber have been the talk of the town for the past week. It seems that your heroic efforts have been at a great sacrifice to yourself," she says, glancing at your missing legs, "and I admire you all the more for it."
You blush and look quite embarrassed for a second, before clearing your throat and stating in a gruff voice "well that's all well and good, but I have more pressing issues to attend to then be admired by human common folk. If you would really like to help me, please point me in the direction of a woodcarver so that I might acquire a set of crutches, and thus continue to serve you humans in a severely dangerous manner."
"Oh I see..." she says and seems a bit disappointed, before an excited look instantly appears on her face and she says extremely quickly "oh I know where you can get crutches! Our capital, Glovedprices is far to the north, and I'd bet they have anything you could ever ask for for sale there. But, you'll probably need a guide to make it there- not that I'm implying you can't find it yourself, what with your amazing- I mean, er, you'd probably like some company on the long journey. I'm a skilled crossbowman, and a decent ranger - my name's Gorhax Rashedcosat by the way- If nothing else, I could even carry you."
"That won't be necessary!" you interrupt, "The carrying that is. As for coming with me, I don't see how it could hurt, as long as you don't get in my way or mooch off my food supplies. We'll be off in the morning; I'd like to rest my head inside an actual building for once."
"GREAT! I'm so excited! I've always wanted to see the city. I hear they have vast dungeons and catacombs below to adventure in, and the food..." At this time she looks down and realizes that you've already crawled past her into the shack.

Inside are four peasants and a child. They all look shocked and stare at you as you crawl your way along the dirt floor unto a bedroll and sit up by leaning on your axe. They look even more shocked when Gorhax scolds them for staring and tells them that you are the Libash Dikemachine, the Elder Echoes of Padlling. You grunt in confirmation, but have little desire to be praised by these filthy slaveholders, and fall asleep in the bedroll. When you awake, dawn is just breaking and the house is packed with peasants eating a disgusting breakfast of various prickleberry products. At the door stands a malnourished-looking goblin, along with two peasants crammed next to him eating. You then see Gorhax in the background, but have no idea as to what she's doing.



If you...

Free the slave and take him with you, then begin traveling to Gloveprices, turn to page 77.

Decide you've had enough slave liberation for a while and go to Gloveprices without the goblin, turn to page 78.

Take the goblin with you and make a detour to clear Storber out of any remaining life, turn to page 80.

Leave the goblin, but make a detour with Gorhax to finish business with Storber, turn to page 81.

Seek out and rescue all of the town's goblins, turn to page 82

Assemble a party of other military-inclined humans from the hamlet, turn to page 83.
« Last Edit: October 09, 2012, 02:52:25 pm by MrWillsauce »
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Ship of Freaks

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #73 on: October 08, 2012, 02:51:27 pm »

page 81
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They are all one and the same. They are all Grek.

tomio175

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Re: Choose Your Own Adventure: Adventure Mode
« Reply #74 on: October 08, 2012, 02:51:40 pm »

78.
If they're slaves, they should've fought better.
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...You're arguing with the GM? Why don't you argue with Jesus about how much Peter liked clams?
Because each player's delicious tears are fuel for the continued torture that is the Warrens of Oric the Awesome.
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