ALRIGHT PEOPLE, TIME FOR AN UPDATE.DUE TO ME MISSING LAST NIGHT'S UPDATE, YOU GET AN UPDATE TODAY AND TONIGHT.
WITH THIS TEAM OF BADASSES, NOTHING SHOULD STAND IN OUR WAY.
WOW, LOOK AT THIS SHITTY ASS PLACE.
NOW START MINING
OKAY, I CAN DEAL WITH TWO ZOMBIES.
OH SHIT THERE THEY ARE
GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE GO GO GO
..NEVER MIND. FUCKING ASSHOLES
OKAY, I'M MAKING DOORS SO THOSE DAMN ZOMBIES CAN'T GET IN.
JUST AN AVERAGE DAY, A DWARF AND HIS HORSE ABOUT TO GET COMPLETELY FUCKED OVER BY A COUPLE OF ZOMBIES.
OKAY, MINE OUT THAT AREA. THAT'S GONNA BE OUR FOOD STOCKPILE.
SHIT, NOW THERE'S 5 FUCKING ZOMBIES
HOLY FUCK HOLY FUCK SHIT WHAT THERE'S FUCKING
WATER HERE!?
FUCK THAT WATER, IT'S PROBABLY NOT EVEN THAT DEEP, JUST MINE THIS
FUCK IT, I'M NOT LOSING MY FORTRESS TO FUCKING WATER OF ALL THINGS, ABORT ABORT ABORT
NEW BASE
FUCKING HELL, WHERE DO ALL THESE ZOMBIES EVEN FUCKING COME FROM!?
WELL SHIT. WE LOST ALL OUR FUCKING FOOD.
REST IN SHIT, HORSES, WE NEVER LIKED YOU ANYWAY.
WHAT THE HELL!? WHO KILLED HIM!?
..GOOD FUCKING RIDDANCE TO THOSE HORSES THEN.
ALREADY DOWN TO 4 DWARVES!? WHAT THE SHIT IS KILLING OFF MY DWARVES
FUCK, NOTE TO SELF, MAKE A FUCKING CORPSE AND REFUSE STORAGE FIR- WAIT, A FUCKING ZOMBIFIED HAIR IS KILLING US OFF!?
...WOW. FUCKING WOW. THAT IS FUNNY AND FUCKING PATHETIC AT THE SAME TIME.
YOU GUYS ARE FUCKING STUPID.
OKAY, THERE'S THIS GUY WHO'S PROBABLY READING THIS THREAD RIGHT NOW. GOOMBAGEEK HIS NAME IS. I KNOW HE CAN MAKE SOME PRETTY FUCKING AWESOME PICTURES OF REPORTS. SO GOOMBAGEEK, IF YOU CAN DRAW A PICTURE OF ANY MOMENT IN THAT ZOMBIFIED HORSE HAIR REPORT, YOU GET THE HONOR OF BEING ONE OF THE FIRST 7 DWARVES THAT MANAGE TO SURVIVE AN UPDATE. AND IF IT'S FUNNY ENOUGH, I'LL USE IT AS MY AVATAR.