Load game, this is what I find.
Go on, miners, you may proceed.
I approve of thsi project.
But wait, there is something that bothers me.
you may be wondering: Taupe, are you checking a menu and doing any remotely useful thing for the fortress? I hear you say, in my head, imagined by drunken stupor.
Yes, vocal figment of my imagination, I be.
behold, for I must fgind the source of those elk boirds.
they ride, they ride,
The elk birds are bright
they roll, they stroll,
in the earth of old
What is this madness?
The birds of unrest?
Wandering in pairs
In the room..ROOM of EVERYWARE.(musical update btw)
So we have elk birds in the room of
The ROOM of EVERYWARE.
Are elk birds wares?
they are wild, untamed,
Those birds are the game
Hunting, strolling,
In the fortress chillin'
They are wild and true
Will they attack you?
Or will they not mind
All the pet i can find(btw moving all the pets to the ROOM of EVERYWARE)
Only ^roblem I have is, eventually we'll run out of pets.
Yes I will forbid the corpses so they all stay there lying and rotting
doesnt solve the problem tho. We need MOAR PETS.
Fuck tables man
Got a change of plan
Dont spent all your life
making chairs and fries
we makin some cage
In case you cant gage
to catch some more pets
From far in the depths!* * * * *
oh shiiiit
Whaat the fuck is this quarry?
When the ocean melts, this ghost...
He'll
drown.The ghost will drown.I must save him. I must... I must slab all the ghosts.
UI love you ghoooosts!!!!
before i can do anything, Haika begins a mysterious construction zone
Why bitch why, im browsing for craftwasdwarf workshipopop.
wowowow just typing this word makes my fingers go round and round
Muy head spin
This workshop is a trap.
still
I cant... cant give up.
must find slabs, save the ghost.
your mysterious construction will not distract me, you hear me?
Nothing will
* * * * *
Oh shit my roomates are watching Top Gun
Taaake me to the...
DANGER ZONE
Oh yers yes yes yes
*I dance*
''HQ we have a problem. The screeen says --Indian Ocean, present day-- but this obviously looks like the eighties...''
* * * * * *
Oh shit the ghosts!
Saved.
Also Lameshork has been missing for a week.
i guess you could say he's our... worstmarksdwarf!
Heyoooooo!
Altho seriously he's probably dead.
* * * * * *
I want to play but...
this dude, next to the quarry he's just...
he's chillin.
he looks like a dcorpse and hes suitting in a hype volcano full of strobe and he's so chill.
Hou-tiii---hou---ti hou ti hou ti
This dude.
the world MUST see this dorf.
i must...
movies.
How do they work.
TOP GUN GIVE ME THE ANSWER!!!!
I try to...
nothing
nothing makes sence
BUT
I saved it as a movie
fuck if ill be to convert and host the movie right now
this website page wants to eat my fucking soul.
Go away, evil page, begone!
--I chant--
You are not welcome
you make zero sence
I took alcohol
i dull mys ences
I cant understand
How to run this shit
but the chillin man
was saved to my disk!Wait i can just click the red x.
*closes webpage
BACK TO GAMING
* * * * * * * *
Oh Naika, you did it.
Dont know who you are,
but you are the shit
Room of everyware,
Too low for this bit
gotta host the table,
In the taco, bitch!* * * * * *
Uh-Oh. This doesnt sound good.
not sure I want this thing around.
Unless.
UNLESS
Unless I make a song about it.
this will work.
Oh-oh, beast of nightmare
Oh-oh, that is not fair
Wouh-ou, born from the depth
Wou-hou, soldiers inept
Ouh-ouh, fight incoming
Ouh-ouh, are we winning?
Wah-ah, I sure hope so
Wah-ah, Something that ends in oh
Dare, dare, to face nightmare
Fare fare, a blow quite rare
Kill, kill, a fight of thrills
Bare bare, In the ROOM of EVERYWARE.This didnt happen btw, im just preemptively being happy and musical about this victory.
Dispatching the army now.
* * * * * *
Neeevermind, it waltzed through the caverns and vanished.
Probably the best if you ask me
If you ask
anyone really.
Lets do something awesome.
candy
Candy is awesome.
Im digging a secret magic pathway to the magma sea.
if everything goes as planned
(it wont)
then we'll be abkle to turn the magma sea into a pond, fill it with water with buckets, and carve a way toward the spire.
Raise your hand if you think this is a great idea.
Ah!
dont you look stupid with your arm raised in the computer lab now.
* * * * * *
sdlow, methodical, the miners dig toward the depth of the earth,
Where no dwarf has dwelved before.
...
wait we have vision of the magma sea thats obviously innacurate
...
where
few dwarves have delved before...
Suddenly the place is looking a lot more ''filled with water'' than anticipated.
The original plan accounted for a normal corridor
this corridor is obviously filled with water
Ugh I hate when plans backfire.
Backfire
YES IF I TURN THE PLACE INTO OBSIDIAN THE WATER GOES AWAY.
Gotta fire back. With fire.
* * * * * * *
interesting fact one:
Ive built the ramp stack in the wrong order.
Interesting fact 2: We now have magmatised miners stuck in the pit.
...
That's right, CloverMagic, you make 'em steel mecanisms.
It's time to retroactively turn this mess into something manageable.
Also the biggest lie was not that the earth is flat
It is that Top Gun is actually a decent movie.
* * * *
Awww fuck.
It is after 6 dwarves have died that i ask myself:
What if i just dug a
diferent tunnel?
....
So the Choo Choo mine is now bigger, and apparently it connects to the same layer i want to build the candy gathering thing.
so.
Many
wasted
Time
...
By time i mean dwarves obviously.
I just have people dig a straight tunnel. Project finished in seconds.
Super efficient if you disregard that part of the fortress slowly filling with magma.
also, magma didnt turn the water pit into obsidian. It just... replaced it.
Not sure how much sence tjhat makes.
we have magma floating over a river of water and they wont mix.
Halp.
Its like liquids are afraid to be seen together.
* * * * * *
Probably should install a contingency lock on my duirect access to a giant pool of magma.
Yes clover magic 2, that is indeed a beautiful buckler.
now go back to making mechanicsms.
Why yes, Cumulus. Youve told me 57 times already.
this corridor has warm stone
Im aware.
no what no no no no
How is it going to be ROOm of EVERYWARE if you take corpses away?
Get those hen skeletons back in there this minute!
MMM
...
MREANWHILE the bridge... wasnt made.
the bridge i made to seal; the project melted.
stupid ice.
Nevermind ive reached the magma. and the candy.
begin the power.
power overwhelming.
we shall be almighty
we shalll
...
.....
!!...!!
F
U
C
K
!
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Topic: !!DRUNK FORTRESS!! [We Hath Become Death, the Destroyers of Worlds] (Read 1240966 times)