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I am small and neutral, like Switzerland

[Scruffy]

...
I don't know what to say so I will say nothing..

I have no idea of what to make of this or what is going on but it certainly is interesting. I just hope that the water draining gates that were opened have been closed. Else it is going to become even more interesting. There appears to be quite heavy selective pressure on dorfs having a high swimming skill and those without it get erased from the gene pool.

[Kamin]

There appears to be quite heavy selective pressure on dorfs having a high swimming skill and those without it get erased from the gene pool.

Do you even eugenics, bro?

[Taupe]

same for wolves really.

[Shoruke]

Oh hye, neat! I havfe Ice tea. Peeach. For voda. Forgot I had his...

Spoiler: df or somethin (click to show/hide)

Anyway, I'm preeeety sure those four shots got me sligthly stipsy. Downed it whiel playing the other drunk fortress 2. (Prop Hunt is fun. For suom sreason I ams bateer at it while drunk)

Oh yeah... that traddtiotn. Today we learned that, um, honey musteard saocue is an oaky abut not great subtstittue for soup stoock sin dry noodles. Wasnt' aso bad, wasnt all that gearst. Chiecken wwesoup sstock is better.

Fuck sit, I keep histting the wrong keys shwen styiping, lset's go.

....waaaaiow.
Okay so
The central staircase is flooding, but only kinda
there is a lake, in some places but tDIE MOSQUITO
BVOSDKA WILL NOWT SAVOE YOU FRWMO ME
where was I
right some parts that look likwe they should have the lake in them, dotn'
I think someone mentioned ther was one dorf? And it's me.
the terreeeees havef fatakne oaver
even the elfvs asre aconfufzzulesd
we have more dead/missing than booze
I think this safor t tis sdeisigned aroudn a central astaircase, but some parts of the fort are mistyfied like the caverns
spoooooopy
I'm pareety asure athtat the river leeaks sinto the fortress sdirectly trhoguh that one channel-hole or wrahtever
can't get at the dining hall because there's a pool in the way. 7/7 deptsh
fuckkkin'... garnie, raight?
sssoem onea sdug a staircase into a tree. but not the whole tree just the roots.

As far as I can dtell, this fortress would have imploded a whiel asgo if ssont tfor fthe fact that we scudk sat tedstroying it.
also I can't type. I may bae aboth tired and drunk. bad combo, btw.

oh also I'm on break like a baller

Uhh. No, I think thisw wsi sa adumb as I tihnk asit its. osmoeone Made a nie shops arrea and then just sidntgt bother colsing off the cavonr.s
waaat
...orite redunks. sIfogotr

I should mention my menatl backspace is sdicsabled. And for someereason may fingers feel heavy so wehn I feeel liefk fhiitting a random key while atyiping I just do. sorry if itss sillegible , iI"m nost treaally rtying to type mey baest.


...uh
sooo i"M agiven fto untderssatnd atht there isnt' tsupposed to abe water here?


this is a magem eforge btw.
great job
we need to rectuir memraids


the water could draain aharmlessyl saway ainto the wacvaren wif noft for that treeee etrunk. damn them. hippy bastards.

well there's only one thing to do dbefore I hit unpause ato reusme mey break.
frist thing is to......
I forgot. OH YEAH
the door to the ediing room. eating room, soz, sellign. sjust remove the door, weget a bath, and then we have the green furnitures back. Then we can tell if the efurnitur e has puke on it. Those chaisr rawre rthe pwek adn pinnacel ofw owur sivalizaiton uyuo know
second thing is...

I dare you to get into a dick fight with a female dwarf, naryar
I adre you

(I'm a guy IRL, butw. And in Japan, I raelly am wangzilla  )

* shoruke breaks

* shoruke is on break

* shoruke is herp derpin' around

at laset ist not lonely. Me an the goshts is just havin a larf
hangin around
shootin' the schist
fuckin the dog (not raelly)
I'M BORED HOLY FUCK HURRY UP

well, to passu my sbraek time, I'mma poaur ranothre drink
but vokda and, koce eor pereeach tea? flippa scoin.
...wchi fucckin side of a 50yen coin is heads. w/e

* shoruke flisp

FKUUKKIT
coke

OH HEY STUFFS HAPPENIN
Shoruke says she cant' sdrestroy the door (wchi cshie just sdestroeyd ) bEcasue stheres' water
NO SHIT

ohhh seh smeatn the OTHER door...
eh.

you wknow... it occrus to me athat sthis task may be isnurmunatble. Even more so wthan aspelling.
evne with 200 wdorfs, sand a good militar writh gear and evrywone wis sfully healtyh and not getting ghost fucKING MOSQUITO SWHERED YOU WGO
I WILL FIN SYOU MOTHERFUCKER I WILL HUNT YUO DOWN
grr. you markq qmy worsd mosquito i will get you
anyway
even with moar dworfs, waht then? un water the caversn, and wthe satirs, adn find the candy?
...iM' lookisn g awt tshi rwong. All of Df is liek that I gess. I jsut need. A projekdt.
I shoudl ssepll that writgh.
Proejt
Proj
Prodje
Pr
...QGS
PROJECT
I need something to do
ummm... clearcut the dforest. yes. piss off tdem welsves. not a grorious aprojedgtect, but it's ...
ist somethign

...on second though, salbs. Maybe these goshts. need me
pproeblem eis, wherem' I soggna find rocks
wiat
ugh
i drunk lemme be
I hafve my mieu scushion to proetct me from negativyities

of  fuck soll of the thigns are forbidden
istem, shops, doosr, all of it
FUKKITALL just build a new shop

awsnt soemone saying somethign about demons? All I see is eslvfs and wombast.
HEYOOOOO

ARE YUO SRSIOUS?
SRSLIYOUSLY
WHAT
GHOSTS CAN SBLONCK SCONTSTRUCTIOSN FUABKLAJGIPOANUIODANGIPUFHDIV;
fuggofffffff

oh gods. wow. Shork actually complained about not having rock.
Thsi fort. Flooding, okay.
demons... bad, but, okay.
stoopid design. duh.
NO ROKCS?!? WHAT TEH FUUUUUUSK
WATH SKIND OF UNDORFVENSFLY FPROBLEM IS
FUKCIN
I DOTN
waaaaaaaah
I need a drikn. *driksn*
I slit need a drignk. *drignks*
I sitllist nseed a
HEY
whafit athe srocks are fobriddn

whereas my up key
...wehres the sarts
satirs
stttttaairs

FOUDN EM
tey'reh udnwerater
sore tehhh erocks
i cn hadnle it
I'mma lord fo sdicks atfer all

WHYMI SDIIDGN

* shoruke Shoruke (other shoruek) stops ssddiggin bfroe stargting and taeks a drink)

GOOD IDEA


odnly just now reazilsed
i Dotn' knwo if fi Iknwo if sthsi lsayout is geaniuos sor fucatarkdedr
...asnewr is yes

adn nwo shrouek is asleep
NOT EM EYOU REATSDR OTEHR SHORUKE

(srooy)
I catn' remember whoy you wmaek a sabl bae fro a scertain dwwarof
(wow amy aspoellign)
'CUz... we havef salebs..... jsut tnot for the sgoths. gosht. sgo gohsts.
so
needa... engrave em

Id' dtrya masson sohp sbut
FUCKKIGN SGOHTS
IN TEH WAY
...imean a crftdepr shop
alraedy gots a mason shop

...I duonk ktnow waht labour maeks sdorfs engrave salbs/?
so I enabled a bunch and now ist happening
but
nwo I still dotn' kntow wich aone is the ritght one 

also
soem fucker
wetn crayz with the neames
and nwo I'm engraving a meorial to stupid elves

...why do i Keep readign taht itn the heavy's voice
ELVF FRIENDSHIP IS STOPPID MADGICK

OH HEY NEAT

I FDOUND THADT DEMONG OR WHADTEVER
heh heh heh "ox pecker"
'mI the onely owne whose dad says "pekcr " as a eupfhe euphefim euphimiei euph
other word for dick?
ISTA FLOATING X DICK LOL RUN
hes' gaoonnna fuckus all lel
OH HEY

dddint' feven notcie sthis shit befoer
wgootta wonder at teh efreiteful headway wee'd amek eif wie wput taht kind odf efoofrt into, like, surviving

*check unit list*
I WODNER WAHT I'M DOING
*flame 52-ish*
WOW I'VE DONE A LOT OF THEM
thast' some orgy
srsly
52 of you in the tiem it took me to even notice
talk about... heh... headway. lel
(I should not be makign sex joke s swihle drunk adn controlling olny a female dorf nameed after me0)

OH WOW
that demo n is in the fortress
on the saem florooor a me
awakwarrrrrd

wow
he gives absolutely no fucsk
or maybe he's just ashamed. I am lodr of wangs after all, any demong would
heheh... wood
be like
"fuck I cant keep up with that"
SO IL OCKED HIM IN
...this place!


HEE HEE HEEEHEH MTHEROFUCKER

demogn is paralizsed with teh feeeers

stcuk between a watre adn a lcoked door
wat wood (heh) you do?
OH FUC KYOU NARYAR I just noticed the dick shaep in that pool.
.....was that nrarayr
nra
nary
whatshisface
wazzat u?

how wdoz speelling

I sawre to fuck
toady maed the bidn for salbs confusing just to spiete me
alt+s you fuckre
BUT I GODDIT DOEN ANYWAYE YOU
YOU
YOU PERSON WHO MAEKS AWESOME GAEMS THTA IM UST SWEAR AT IGTH NOW
I DID TEH ETHING
I GOT SOEMTHIGN DONE
WHERES THE FUCKING MIGRATNS


i'M like 9-% shuure thaere's another gohst but shoRuke is dirinking
she desrves its

in other noos, a hen has been missign fro a week.
HEY KAMIN
NEXT POLL SHOOD BE ABOUT HOW GIVES A FUSCK ABOUT A MISSIGN HEN
in drunkfort venice with 1 dorf

what the...
5 slabbs
4 goshts put to rest
no sgoghsts left
uhhhhhhhhhhh
....it worsk

new prject!

I wodner if I can caevin that bit uspatisr that maeks the water flwo in.
stehn next poster will have beetter fps!
CATN' FAIYL LETS' DO IT
fuck i Get dizzy lookign at this screeen
it keeps blignking bluee and stuff 

* shoruke vaffrooms

ist is a mirackle of natur that I keep remembring to srcoll to the bottttom of the post whne I hit preview lookign for new messagjizz

uh
hey so
slab lsits says stheres' no moare goshts to engrave
but theres' still ghosts
so
wtf
dude
w/e eat least they've not hoverign up asin my smpersonal space like the other ons

so Iv'e edcided that not floodign the fortress permarnetnly is impossible
beacuse sthe olny parts up top that I can cavein are ovr the walls of the water
(it maeks sencse)
and the water flows into a wlake s I can't tdrain it.
...so... sruffy. You did this. I tihnk. Be prowd of your incirrigibble failure. You did a greate job makign sure I catn't unsdo your hard work. Yuo monster.
I'M PIMPRE-
IMPERESSED, DANM YOU

I couldtn' make seomthign this hard to undo if I tried sobre

fukkin skeeter is ack
mieu proetected me
gj Mieu

wepl I catn't remember waht else to do so it's timE TO FUCK TREES
wheeeeee

ugh
coudgln't dget Shork to go to the sufrace
even when carrrying a battleaxe and I think she had a clear path?
So I told her to go to the surface with a military 'm'ooooove thing
and she met a crocodile
BUT HAY
I GOT TO BEAT UP A CROC
uon my way... UP?
and now we're both unconscious
OH GOOD THERE'S A TROLL TOO and I'm figthnig it
i'm so good at things


sceeen froze like this sfor a coupple secodns so we know what's up next

fukkin fuckers ruining the internet

i dont fucking care
formats
suck
here
http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=10858

if it didnt work tell me and i''ll fix it when i'm hunsgover instaed of drunkd

[Scruffy]

Oh.
Wow.
That was a rather dwarven turn. (Infact so were the previous two turns too)

so Iv'e edcided that not floodign the fortress permarnetnly is impossible
beacuse sthe olny parts up top that I can cavein are ovr the walls of the water
(it maeks sencse)
and the water flows into a wlake s I can't tdrain it.
...so... sruffy. You did this. I tihnk. Be prowd of your incirrigibble failure. You did a greate job makign sure I catn't unsdo your hard work. Yuo monster.
I'M PIMPRE-
IMPERESSED, DANM YOU

Doesn't anyone notice the lever straight next to the cause of problem noted with something along the lines of "water flushing. nearby gates"? You know, the single lever that caused this mess and which can just be pulled again to stop all the flooding?
*sigh*

[Shoruke]

I'm too drunk to notice a crocodile between me and the ground floor. Bit e me.
And also a troll.
And a demon.
...I'm drunk.

Also, I'm slightly tempted to start that turn again and decontruct that lever, and replace my dffd link with a new one where the lever is deconstructed. Just because you said that.

[Scruffy]

Also, I'm slightly tempted to start that turn again and decontruct that lever, and replace my dffd link with a new one where the lever is deconstructed. Just because you said that.

Not if I get there first
Might take a SHORT turn later tonight if I can get a bit of booze. Only some stout at the moment

[Scruffy]

Drank a fwe peer. Beers a d should be ready for this
Buggrit! Buggrem! Millenium hand and shrimp, I'll do it damn it and save the fort from myself

Darn the reclaiming process is slow on my laptop
What will we take? Militia? Dorfinators against the demon and aquawolves?
Metal?


Nah. grapes and plunpelmets. plenty of GRapes. We will brew wine. Seems suitable
Camels? One-humped ones? hmm..
nah. more booze and cats with those points
Hmm.. we will need a bookkeeper/broker/manager/generally all but useless excuse for a dorfg for sorting our decade worth of random dorf crap littering the place.
What skills does a broker need? I chose profisient liar. Seems suitable
Oh, and we are called the "Drownedlake the Disenboweled Nightmare of Demons"




The lever should be somewhere here
..under this giant pile of dorven rubbish


found it. wait, are the both drainage gates open? explains why only halfd of the water entered the fortress and we are not entirely flooded. well, both of them have controll levers STRAIGHT NEDXDT TO THEM!
pulling them


wAIT; WHAT?!?
someone had pulled the fortress collapse auto-destruction lever and the whole fort should habve collapsed but isw alive onlu because it is hanging from a peach tree bracnh that wasnt there a few turns ago!
What a pleasant surprise it could be to a confused woodcutter when the fort collapses in front of him after he fells the tree...
The whole dfort was saved by a single peach tree!


Job done


Nowe we just need to seal that oxpecker. the flooding will sort itself out. hoepfully
Caverns? What caverns. I see no caverns nor breaches into them. Nope. Not there. Not my problem

WAIT! the fort wasnt about to collapse. A DAMN TOWERCAP grew inside the staircase and was supporting the fort


close enuff
It's not a breach. tis a "feature". Yep, lets call it a feature

everyone is too horrified to build

horrified? of what? theres nothing down there but dank darkness and hints of crundles.
..
wait..
I have already caused the fort to crumble twice or so because i entered the lower parts of hte fort nd caverns and wasn't excessively carefull about it..
well, if it happened twice it can't possibly happen a third time. nope
OOH! A downward passage. The demonhole

Should we get rid of the water in the dickroom?


aww dorf up damn it! the caverns are harmless. it is all in your imagination

Made a large glass of white russian. wait, arent white russians usally about 10% vodka and a bit of coffee liquier?
well, i suppose that 1/3 of vodka and 1/3 liquer are acceptable. might aswell skip the milk. or coffee.

the place is starting to rot..
miasma everywhere
that lier dorf  brought? truns out it ws naryar. he is now the concentrated noble dorf who nbever does anything
we appear to have trolls..
the troll interrupted bobnova. troll is experiencing mortal fear
that should teach them that they are not welcome here
you came to the wrong neighbourhood troll

removing stairway to the lowest levels. would take too long to wait for the mto drain from water and seal all the holes.
plus there are demons down there. i think

troll is unconcious and both naryar and bobnova passed ouyt from over excertion after bashing the troll for a fw days


dogsjust butchered 3 troggolytes that tried to enter the fort
nope. make that A dog. and only 2 dead troggolytes. one barely alive
more trogolytes


4 trogs dead, one half-dead troll remains. a fw dorfs too
more trogs coming in
more. we are losing
bobnova is running aroun d the caverns, hitting trogs



4 trogs inside. we are going to lose.
removed militia jobs. fly you fools!
kamin has fallen



3/4 dorfs sleeping.
bbnova, stop being a hero. atleast wehen you are unarmed.
well, he won
DAMN IT BOB! STOP TRYIGN TO REST ON TOP OF SCRUFFEH! THERE ARE MORE hospital beds
wait, thats not ven a bed! thats a dead quarry bush!
everyone is just sleeping while the trolls party downstairs

HURRAH! all the invider trolls and trogoltes are dead. only a fwe mostly harmess ones remaining in the cavers
....'
AND A WOMBAT!
a bloody wombat just walking around like it ownes the place
game runnign so slow..

poured a glass of hazelnut baileys i got as a gift. never really cared for mild tasting drinks but it is ok
atleast when you have a large glass of it

3 skeepung sleeping, one ignoring everything
if we only had migrantgs...
why is one of the dorfs revfusing to do ANYTHING?
oh.. lost the ability to stand or grasp on either hand and nobody around to help him...
erm.. shit happens?
i think htat they are ALL waiting for diagnosis or someone to carry them to a bed.. they are useless until migrants
WHO THE HELL REMOVED ALL THE BEDS FROM THE HOSPITAL!?! CURSE YOU

BYUT THE FORT DID NOT FALL! WE SDTAND TALL.. well,atlest lie on our backs relatively proudly

late summer. migrants soon i hope. then we can seal the cavers
playing nethack while waiting
dorfs are starting to dehydrate due to lack of caretakesrs
the wopmbat lost interest in our courtyard and buggered off
------
autumn
all this flowing water is killing my laptoip. should ve managable if the lake filled up
giant cave spiders appear. kill jabberers

in other news, everyone starved in their sleep
only bobnova remains
The lake is nearly full. only 2 more z-levels
caravan!
åerhaås Perhaps migrants soon. Before bobnova kicks the bucket

hmm.. i wonder whats that strange thing littering hte enterence drawbridge
<grown orange wood harp>
BLOODY ELVES! littering the place

You can't drown me, I will not sink
not now, not ever, no never...

..a diplomat left unhappy
and the the fort crumbled
Reclaim with some militia with masonry to seal the caverns. then the fort should be survivable. (though not functional.. wouldnt want to make it too easy)
Embarking with 5 hammerdorfs and 2 axedorfs with skills in masonry.
will seal the troglodytehole once and for all. (or not. Most likely not)

wait, what`´`?
WHAT THE HELL DORFS?


murky pool in teh mioddle of the first floor filled again due to reclaim. damn it.
4/7 of the dorfs are kiond of.. drowning
AMBUSH!
amphibian man spearman?

The fort was overrun by aquamen during the 2 months it too to reclaim?!?
dorfs didnt give a shit and hyst walked past it to fetch weapons

the aqyuaman is just standing there...

GIANT OLM!
what the fuck kamin? stip climbing the towercaps'
one dead olm

trying to redo stockpiles.
they are crap but they are better than nothing. too drunk
beds for hospital

Hurrah! the caravan forgot their stuff in our depot when the fort crumbled
blind cave ogres killing merchants in the caverns..
fort falling int he middle of caravan does starange things to reclaims

OGRES ON THEIR WAY TO GET IN!
BUIOLD THE WALL DAMN IT!



just 3 walls to go and we area sealed
except for flying monsers. we have those water drainage pipes that can let htem in
THE FORT IS FINALLY SURVIVABLEAGAIN! not fucntional though. only hammerdorfs with masonry


we are ..mostl drained, well, nobody wants to use those rooms anyway
scruffy drowned
noithbing much is happening, camulus is rendering fat and bobnova is sowing his seed. naryar has been in permasleep after the olm
kamin and shork are now nobles. kamin shold be able to heal camulus. what is the worst that could happen when a hammerdwarf starts doing surgery?=


urp. I think that I have drank enough fgor today
kamin swimming around
DAMN TIt When ever the water´level is low they think that htey an walk accrsops it
all bacause of the water drainage

we have trogs again

seems like a few walls unfinsihed

hammerKamin diagnosed that Camulus needs surgery on his left hand, thumb, nail and thumb, left hand, skin...

lamin decided that camulus needs more surgery

adamantine strand sewn into thumb with hands covered in tears

im sure that he wills be the hearlthiest dorgf in the fort after all thise treatement
a dorf drowned. agian

Grape harvest! We have wine!
mgirants shoudl arrive soon so will stop playing. Actually want to stop but must endure

The fort is livable! No beasts, demons or trolls. Non-flyers can't access the fort via vcaverns. Only a few rooms are flooding.
huge success
it's a happy little place full of happy little midgets butchering killing troglodytes

trying to upload save tonight

[TheFlame52]

awesome

[Taupe]

Reason you couldn't go to the door because it was flooded was... I too tikd the shoruke to demolish one of tge door. he didnt get to it before i gave up. so when you told him to remive the itger door... he did, which drowbed tge itger one i designated earlier.

[Scruffy]

http://dffd.bay12games.com/file.php?id=10862

pictures tomorrow

[Shoruke]

Can someone briefly transcribe the history of this fort?
When was it founded, how long it took to first fall, maybe some of the major accomplishments in that time, and how many reclaims have been done?
I actually lost count of which reclaim we're on.

[Taupe]

I had something like that in mind but I just got home from work and I have to be up in like seven hours. Will try to re-read the history of the waterfort and compile the turns tomorrow, unless someone else is very eager to do work.

Darn the reclaiming process is slow on my laptop
What will we take? Militia? Dorfinators against the demon and aquawolves?
Metal?

Nah. grapes and plunpelmets. plenty of GRapes. We will brew wine. Seems suitable
Camels? One-humped ones? hmm..
nah. more booze and cats with those points
Hmm.. we will need a bookkeeper/broker/manager/generally all but useless excuse for a dorfg for sorting our decade worth of random dorf crap littering the place.
What skills does a broker need? I chose profisient liar. Seems suitable
Oh, and we are called the "Drownedlake the Disenboweled Nightmare of Demons"

Also... that part about the broker. It killed me.

[Bobnova]

in other news, everyone starved in their sleep
only bobnova remains

OMFG I was the last one?! That's awesome!

[Naryar]

Double single dwarf challenge ! Holy shit ! This fort keeps getting better and better !

It must be the water. Or the corpses. Or the miasma.