10:58 PM: Alright, already starting with chugging a quarter of the bottle while I load the save. Fucked if I can remember where my shot glasses are.
11:01 PM: Yep, here comes the return of the fucked-up tiles. Let's see what's going on here, I'll see if I can dorf myself too.
11:04: Took a while to find the entrance. Augh we have keas somewhere, and no plant food? And our entrance is unsecured. Dorfed myself as an unwitting unnamed mason. Time for another swig.
11:08: Dafuq? Squio, stiop building machenisms, we need you to mine. Also, are we elves or something? Our shit is all outside. Gotta have another swig.
11:10: Someone has demanded we repeat making rock statues. Eh? I need doors too, hnnng.
11:15 PM: Oh wait, bottle says 100-proof. no wonder I'm feeling it. Plus 1 swig. Buitcher the pussy, and the yakas. Leave the birds I guess, I see nest boxes. Gimme beds, doors, and bridges! Bridge for da bride god!
11:17: You I shall name Dwarfy. There wasa forumite that was valled that before, right? Meh.
11:19: Hey you! I mean, jhey me! Stop fishing, we need plump jelmets! Also, elves are here, time to loot some shit! Oh right, need a trade depot? Huh? We didn't HAVE one yet?
11:24: Wrex is our elf annoyer, Kamin does damn near everything else/ Build that trade depot faster, damnit! Alsom the pussy is now edible.
11:30: Taking forever to get someone to man the depot. Damniy.
11:31: Suck my dick, The Sweetness of Fangs! Fucking elfs. Also, +1 swig. I stle fuckuing EVERYTHINGH/
11:34: Gonna make food storage here so we can live less like puny humies, outsuide. Also? Plump helmnets for everyone. Fuck you if you don't like your shrooms. Also saving and backing up filwe in
case of crash./
11:37: Back to work you louts. Doefing SanDeigo juyst because I can. Plus ein swig. Scheisse I'm feeling fuzzy and it isn't summer yet.
11:40: The mercants from Tira Afe have embraked on their yada yda fuck you guyts. Also making Magic be more accuraTe ib her bean-countong. Kamin, shuit the fuck up about being unable to findf and train our wart dogs.
11:44: Murdering our new elvemn pets for meat, and carving storage space fgor useless shit. Man I dfeel fuzzxy. Over hallf a bottle will do that to you. Augh it isdn't even past early spring. Gotta piss, I'll let it run.
11:48: Damnit Wrex, we don'ty need a party. Plus 1 swig I guess. Southern Comfort starts to taste less tolerable after you have ebnoughh. Also, the keas are lyrking somewhere and I dunno why they haven't made a move yet!
11:50: Why do I have to be the slow guy? Very dizzy, gonna try and get a whole tyear before my pint runs out. Styupid Krogan is stealing my workers. Fuck paties. I vote for the anarchist prty/
11:55: Slow ghame ios slow. Gonna lay off the SC until I feel less buzzy. And until we get to summer if I can.Also, fuck parties. Unmettibnfg=hall'd our duining rooms vbecause fuxck parties. Also dorfed Yoink, Swonn, and others just from going back throygh p[rior pages.
11:58: Mine faster Jervill! We gotta have storage for dumb stuff we may never need because we'll sieze asll the thngs! Because humans and elves don't cunt as people. Only just now in midspring. Also, fucking parties still iongoing even after I mant our dining places not count as meetting areas.
12:04 AM: Party's over, fuck you gutys. Also, wwe got igrants! Skil;s will be assign as needed and people shall be dorfed.
12:07: Damnit Kamin, you need a less shiry table? Stupid mantis queen.
12:12: Shoruke and others are dorfed. Gonna look at skills to see what we need, and get some rabdomn dorfs training to honor Armok. Very fuzzy, little less than half my SC, and wishing I had more lemonadfe drink mix.
11:17: TheFlame can't path? Huh? And dangerous terrarian? Uhoh/
12:22: Objective shall kead our markdorfs, first squad is a clusterfuck. Huh? Atis the fishfucker has been found dead? When? Hoqw? Fuck, gott PRocure cofiins.
12:25: Hmm, still slow on our shroom production, maybe that random dorf lkcded shrooms?
12:27: Ofuck. TYhat explains it. Keas are so fucking hardcore. They will eat your soul man!
12:30: Why can't they bew plump helets now? Unless I gotta uise the farmer's workshop and process to barrel? Dafuq? I want me shroom booze!
12:33: QWait, I think we need barrels. Doh. Only midspring? AUgh. At least I haven't needed a wig in a while, feeling very fucked up. Whee.
12:36: Huh? Why you so fucked up? Kweas agaion? Or has gravity been a bitch?
12:39: Restroom again, veru fuzzxy. Bluh, not muxch happening. Midsopriong aLMmost over. So many typoes./ I blame typo imps. Will dorf more formuites wghen summer arrives. I say if I we ever earn a king, name him Toady.
12:42: Why can't I brew booze? We have barrels and plump helets. Helots? Helmets. This is not Sparta, gimme my fucking shroom booze! Also why so slow?
12:43: Someone cancwel;led a task because emotinal shock. Also because puking. No source of this steange fall and pukiness. Huh? And a giy has been hoffied? Horrified. Fuyck.
12:36: Struck pyrolucite! I thimnk. I dob't recall digging there. Damnit mantis goddess, you're trying to gaslight me!
12:47: Sweet zombie Jesus what! No. Fuck, were ficked! Gonmna backup save in case of fun. By Fun, I mean crashes. Becauser werefuckers.
12:50: Slow saving is slow. Also might've derped and "backed up" the save I downloaded, previously. good thibng I didn't have a crash! Now, my archer crossblw guys, kill the werething!
12:51: Uhoh, the werebeat is ruing someone;'s shit. He also mauled a guy. And a cock. Haaah.
12:53: San Deigo is a woman and bitched a chick. Womanception.
12:55: Magic! Me! Centurian too! Ohfuck!
12:57: The werething is human now. Why has the military failed to engangwe?
12:58: Rawr! Rawr indeed! Kill thgat cunt!
[imghttp://i810.photobucket.com/albums/zz27/Chaosvolt/Drunk%20Fortress%203/image19_zps8a7b9176.png[/img]http://1:00: Ahah! Got the bitch. And I am asafe! YaY! We need coffins tjhough...
1:03: We lot our manager and bookeeper? Fuck it, I'm da bean cunter now. We need mor4e coffee. Er, coffins. Alasp can finally berw pur shrooms. Almost everone is horrified
1:05: We need more coffins, fuckiung astat! Still midspring I tghink. Ohwell, still buzzy. Also, so much cancelspam due to hoffied dorgs. And I thouth adventurer mode conversations slowed shit dowen!
1:07: Amazed we haven't had a tantrum yet, some unhappy-looking derfs. Wqant more lemonrade before I take any more aSC.
1:11: Relative being an idiot and calling me while I'm busy making lemonade drinky stuff. Thidfty. 5th or 6ths of late spring. So many job cancels die to PTSD. It's the fucking Gulf War: Werewolfedition!
1:13: Finallty a tranrtum, and a kea getting what it derves? Bobnova is pitching a fit because derp.
1:14: uhoh, Theflame can't snitch and be a CYKA because he hasd vbeen KOed? Swig time.
1:17: Fuck, my shield! Our shield! Also I have a big fat grave stockpile becauyse we cabn't build realm tombs fast enough.
1:18: Scruffy is redorfed because I think the the werefucker ate his face.
1:19: Net is derping at this mnoment, yay for being so damn slow. Fuck sateelites.
1:22: Lolfail is in and out of consciousness, dunno if we have a hospital. We have a mass grave, is that closee enouigh?
1:24: Net still down, Triffle has cancelled my casket-hauling via SHeer force of PTSD. Assrabbit. We also need bridges. I lack switcvhes so far...
1:27: Oi, I don't remember signing in on Steam. Dafuq? Also says I have become a manager. Cool? Still late spring...
1:30: Lots of "drop-off point inaccessible" and "dangerous terrain" concwelationd for basic eating. Also, Kamin? You're a trantrum. And these morons keep canceling importament building because they are scared of me,
1:32: Kamin, don;t surpend my bridge just because you're feeling like tantrumming!
1:34: Net is back. More random dorfings of forumites, new and deadeded. Kamin fifhts the Jervill. Shoruke, try not to die again.
1:38: We need more mechs. Sp much tantrum.
1:41: Nearly tripped over everytyhing takibg a restroom break. still guzxzy-headed.
1:45: Some idiot ate the mason shop? But...doors! Weapin racks! Stuff!
1:49: +1 swig because felt less fucked, still nort summer yet? Augh. Building mnre bedrooms and an overwatch zone for the trader depot.
1:52: Summer at last. And some asshat kea stole a disc! So tired too...gotta make it until year is done. Or try. Still fuzzy/
1:56: Augh, so hard to fovus. I can't keep it up for a full year. Sorry, I done fucked up. At least I never had a crash. Sorruy. x-x
Poll
Author
Topic: !!DRUNK FORTRESS!! [We Hath Become Death, the Destroyers of Worlds] (Read 1239220 times)