Okay, I'm finally going to type out the dream I had... probably a week or so ago, now. Somehow I haven't forgotten it.
The part I remember began with me thinking about album covers. Trying to come up with a design for one for a band I was in, specifically- I'm not sure if said band actually existed or if this was all hypothetical. I think it may have been the latter, actually, I get the feeling I was sort of on the threshold between a doze and proper sleep at this point.
A couple of designs went through my head, the first of which resembled 1,000 Bullets cover art somewhat, with a lot of flat planes of colour and dramatic shading, like graphic novel art. It depicted some guy standing in a darkened, bullet-riddled, room (some sort of fancy/dilapidated barroom, I think) with his back to a wall and a gun in his hand, his teeth clenched in a snarl.
I thought for a bit about who I could get to pose for the picture (apparently it was actually a photo, despite looking like an illustration?), considered a certain friend of a friend for a while, then moved on to an entirely different idea.
This one was quite dramatic and strange, showing a large, bright, futuristic-looking white room.
There were a couple of walls/partitions/items of furniture, I think, but the focal point was shared between two characters in the image.
One was a mostly humanoid robot (well, a skeletal-looking metal humanoid robot, kind of like one of the ones featured in Timesplitters 2) holding what looked to be a large, unrealistic sci-fi laser rifle. It was facing towards the right of the scene, seemingly standing guard.
Behind it, emerging from a vent in the ceiling, was an athletic-looking human cyborg who was unmistakably some sort of cheesy ninja assassin. One arm, lowering out of the vent along with the upper part of his torso, held a single-edged sword, presumably some bizarre futuristic katana. The other hand still remained unseen in the vent, but it too held a katana. Somehow.
The cyborg assassin had a fairly... ugh, I'm forgetting the exact details. But he had a mostly robotic face from what I remember, with some sort of backlit screen or shiny/bright lenses on it, at least one arm that was (at least partially) constructed from metal, and a mostly-exposed human torso that was inexplicably wrapped partially in some form of cloth bandage-like garment, covering the sides and ribs whilst leaving the upper chest exposed. There may have also been some wrappings around the neck, I'm not sure.
His strange dress sense will become important later on.
After a moment focusing on this scene, wholly approving of its potential as an album cover, it began to move.
The assassin swiftly dropped down from the vent, landing lightly on his feet and immediately springing into movement. As soon as he dropped down, the robot guard began to whirl around to face him, its gun raising dangerously and possibly beginning to charge a shot/fire to one side.
The assassin, however, was already attacking; with a series of strange, awkward-looking hops with his back craned backwards and his arms outstretched before him, he covered the ground between him and the guard and simultaneously severed both its arms with an upward strike of his swords.
At this point the dream shifted to me controlling the assassin through a series of increasingly-difficult videogame-style levels, which were other rooms of this strange, blindingly white facility we were in. I think at some points it was third person, others it was first person, but it was constantly hectic.
I remember one moment in ultra-realistic FP, where I dropped into a room, saw I was outnumbered and quickly fled from a group of guards. I glanced back, saw them following me, dived around a corner and spun around to place a small mine I had on my person. Thinking something like, "I'm surprised they still fall for this," or "they fall for this every time," I set the mine then continued running. All or most of the group were shortly destroyed by the blast as they charged around the corner after me.
Level after level I continued through this strange game. I can't remember many details, but more and more traps and different enemies were being added as I progressed. It was getting harder, much harder; I was sure I had almost reached my target- whoever/whatever that was.
Finally I dropped into what looked to be an exceptionally difficult room. I saw several of the normal guards, a turret or two, and two dramatically-clothed human figures, at least one of which held a sword- a boss battle!
I quickly put some distance between myself and the turrents (along with the other threats) and resolved to deal with the mooks first. There was some more mine action, I believe, perhaps along with some swordwork for good measure, the details are unimportant. The robot guards were soon dealt with and I turned to face the others.
As the two warriors rushed me, clad in flashy, dramatic-yet-stylish outfits, it became apparent that they were women. Attractive women.
Actually I think I noticed that at the start of the scene, but putting it this way makes it more dramatic. Bite me, it's 4 AM.
The first of them, more aggressive (and, oddly enough, seemingly based off a real person I have seen photos of) lunged at me.
I dodged her attack, and could, I think, have easily killed her at this point- but, despite being a (presumably) cold-hearted, (again presumably) highly-trained, (definitely) deadly cyborg assassin, I shied away from killing someone so beautiful. Perhaps I thought to try reasoning with them? Whatever the case, rather than using my swords (I'm assuming I sheathed at least one of them for a moment) I grabbed her around the neck in some strange reverse-headlock/wrestling hold, then dropped backwards, slamming her head into the floor.
With her stunned for at least a moment, I sprang up and drew my sword(s) to fight the other one.
As she rushed towards me, however, she did something unexpected. She dropped her weapon- I believe it was a sword- darted swiftly through my guard and began to lick my right nipple. Truly, she had found the weak point of my strange, impractical ninja-outfit.
Overwhelmed by this unexpected (not to mention sexy) manoeuvre, I collapsed to my knees dumbfounded as she lapped at my manly ninja-nip. All thought of battle drained from my mind, along with most of the blood. I most likely dropped my sword, but either way I wasn't likely to use it any time soon.
At that point, it was all over for me. She straightened up, sharing a laugh with her comrade.
"Yes, we are pretty damn sexy*," she said with a smug, satisfied look, and as the dream began to fade, dooming my ninja-cyborg-self to gods-know-what terrible fate, I bitterly reflected on how very many times I had made it this far only to fail on this particular level.
Pretty badarse dream overall if you ask me! Even if I fell to a devious trap before I could complete my mission, whatever it was!
* - or something to that effect.