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[Haspen]

I dreamt that ISIL moved to Europe and began sending nuclear-powered bombers with mini-nukes on board. So basically after delivery, the bombers would crash and produce nuclear blast on a small scale, on their own (at least that worked in my dream, shush).

So of course evacuation was in place and I began to walk with the crowd eastwards as bombers and mini-nukes exploded things to the west. Finally, a samaritarian guy named Steve offered his mini-van as a lift for anyone who can get in, so of course I was one of first people to rush in, along with a black guy named Carl. Then we began to ride through the crowd, with Steve trying very hard not to run over old people and baby carriages (he did, unfortunately).

Meanwhile, US President called Putin and asked him to help with ISIL, only to slam the red phone in anger after Putin asked for Alaska in exchange.

So we managed to arrive at a small airport when we noticed a bomber going straight at it. Carl ran for the woods; Steve rode off along the airplane strips and I decided to run and hide behind one of cargo ramps leading into the airport buildings.

It did shield me from the blast but the fallout got better of me and I landed in the hospital. There I perished from radiation burns and illness and joined Carl the black guy, who was in heaven too, because he got into a car crash just few days after the airport bombing.

Just to be sure I asked Carl if he was gay (he wasn't) and then we watched HeavenTV report on Steve the 'good taxi guy' who was elected the next US president after he made a one-man hit-and-run on ISIL headquarters and killed all their leaders.

The end v:

[MaximumZero]

Non lucid dream spent in a movie about punching Will Farrell. Will Farrell had found a genie lamp, and wished to sound smarter. So, I was magically assigned to him. He'd spout one of his traditional dumbass one liners, and I'd come out of nowhere to punch him in the face. Every. Single. Time. Even if he was running or hiding. Even if it was delayed a little bit, which was usually pretty funny.

I had one line in the movie. At the end, he's trying to get the girl, and makes a smartass comment. I ninja-appear behind him, and he turns around and flinches. I pat him on the head and say, "That was actually pretty clever, but I'm still watching."

[mastahcheese]

Non lucid dream spent in a movie about punching Will Farrell. Will Farrell had found a genie lamp, and wished to sound smarter. So, I was magically assigned to him. He'd spout one of his traditional dumbass one liners, and I'd come out of nowhere to punch him in the face. Every. Single. Time. Even if he was running or hiding. Even if it was delayed a little bit, which was usually pretty funny.

I had one line in the movie. At the end, he's trying to get the girl, and makes a smartass comment. I ninja-appear behind him, and he turns around and flinches. I pat him on the head and say, "That was actually pretty clever, but I'm still watching."

This needs to be an actual movie.
10/10 Would watch again.

[SaberToothTiger]

Non lucid dream spent in a movie about punching Will Farrell. Will Farrell had found a genie lamp, and wished to sound smarter. So, I was magically assigned to him. He'd spout one of his traditional dumbass one liners, and I'd come out of nowhere to punch him in the face. Every. Single. Time. Even if he was running or hiding. Even if it was delayed a little bit, which was usually pretty funny.

I had one line in the movie. At the end, he's trying to get the girl, and makes a smartass comment. I ninja-appear behind him, and he turns around and flinches. I pat him on the head and say, "That was actually pretty clever, but I'm still watching."

This needs to be an actual movie.
10/10 Would watch again.

I actually would watch that movie.

[Haspen]

I have to admit that MZ's movie-esque dreams are better than mine

[Tawa]

Non lucid dream spent in a movie about punching Will Farrell. Will Farrell had found a genie lamp, and wished to sound smarter. So, I was magically assigned to him. He'd spout one of his traditional dumbass one liners, and I'd come out of nowhere to punch him in the face. Every. Single. Time. Even if he was running or hiding. Even if it was delayed a little bit, which was usually pretty funny.

I had one line in the movie. At the end, he's trying to get the girl, and makes a smartass comment. I ninja-appear behind him, and he turns around and flinches. I pat him on the head and say, "That was actually pretty clever, but I'm still watching."

This needs to be an actual movie.
10/10 Would watch again.

I actually would watch that movie.

We got any insiders in any major studios?

Because this needs to be a corporeal thing.

[MaximumZero]

Day made. ^_^ Thanks, all.

[IronTomato]

a black guy named Carl.

You mean this guy?

[Steelmagic]

In my dream I was being hunted by a dude with two large knives, I don't know who or what he was, but I got a note in a video game case that he was going to kill me. I was apparently staying at the house of my girlfriend or crush or something and was taking the trash out with my shotgun wielding friend when she spotted the truck the dude drove. I went back inside the house took the shotgun and looked outside to see the guy, wearing some sort if iron mask a jacket and shorts. I shot him in the chest, he didn't care. Shot him again, nope, repeated this before shooting him in the head and just bouncing off his mask. Eventually the others in the house distracted him and we jumped in her truck to escape. Then I woke up.

[Sappho]

I'm in line, waiting to get on a bus. I haven't decided if I really want to get on, but as I approach the driver to pay, a small black cat scoots past me and runs on board. My decision made for me, I pay and look inside the bus. There's the usual row of seats to the right, but on the left there's a huge room with a large swimming pool in the middle, and people reclining on deck chairs in the sunlight along the edge. I get down on my hands and knees and look for the cat, who runs straight over to me and jumps on my lap. While I stroke it, it tells me in clear English that it only got on the bus in the first place because it's never gone swimming and is eager to try. I tell it to go ahead, and it bounds over to the pool. As it leaps into the pool, it's suddenly a young girl, maybe 6 years old and fully clothed. I run after her, annoyed, telling her she needs to get some of her clothes off to swim. I help her get her shirt off and she has a bathing suit on underneath. I reach down into the water and start untying her sneakers. When I finally get them off and out of the pool, the girl is gone. She's run off again. I lay out the clothes in the sun, hoping they'll be dry before the bus reaches our stop, and look around for the girl so I can make sure she has something to wear. But she's turned back into the cat now, and is looking up at me with an amused expression.

[RekkaAtsuma]

Had a weird one, 7 female characters from various anime and game i like were helping me fight off some strange thing that was never mentioned or shown, but we knew it was eating dimensions and crapping out senselessness
(as if that wasn't senseless in it's own right)
I never saw myself in the dream - which is weird as I usually do...whether over-shoulder or reflection views, and we all were super-serious focused on eliminating the bad w/e. Not unusual for me, but extremely unusual for more than 4 of those 7 ladies.
Turns out, the thing eating dimensions was a dream a Harry Potter style Boggart had while trapped in an Iron maiden in the Merethic era of The Elder Scrolls

I will admit I had just gotten to a good, albeit disturbing to me, stopping point in ESO


Now the next one I had just before waking today and posting here/now:
I was floating Dog head flying through a World ruled by my IRL buddy's pet cat, and she irl is a little "mrs I da queen FATCAT" and i nthe dream was tha t ramped to 11-thousand. Apparently I was supposed to pet her somehow but as I was a floating dog head all I did was flap my ears like a butterflies' wings(yes i gave off rainbow colors light as i did this if anyone wants to know), then she magically transformed into a giant Super-nova Robot Cell phone Pyramid and began doing a river dance to the beat of Thunderstruck by ACDC with baby coos as the lyrics while my all-of-a-sudden now floating bunny-head MOOed in a black hole and created Rocket Racoon from Marvel who for some reason was a Deer in my dream...and then we(me/queencat/Rocket the Deer-racoon) magically fused into one almighty but utterly stupid being and said "ARISE" and I woke up.

[Orange Wizard]

I had a fairly interesting dream last night.
It started with a fairly normal day in a school classroom (maths, I think), except I didn't bring my bags/books/anything, and I didn't know where to sit. Everyone else had taken their seats and were chatting about whatever.
I started talking to a girl sitting in the front row. She got very excited, discussing a bunch of (probably made up) anime, of which the details escape me. I was less enthusiastic, but still enjoyed the conversation.
Before too long, the teacher appeared, and demanded that we both shut up and do the work. I, not having anything to work on, continued standing in front of the girl's desk, while she started digging into a substantial looking textbook. She looked up at me and said something in Latin. I can't remember what it was. The teacher heard, however, and lead her out of the room.
I wandered about for a few minutes before the teacher came back in, with the girl slung across their shoulder. (The teacher seemed fairly androgynous. I want to say "she", but the fuzzy beard kind of disputes that. I also never saw their face, so yeah.) It wasn't until this point that dream-me realised that the school was effectively a prison, with very strict (but apparently nonsensical) rules, armed guards, and so on.
Anyway, the teacher dumped the unconscious girl on one of the empty seats in the back of the classroom. I went over to her, she woke up, and started crying uncontrollably. I kind of fumbled around, unsure of how to comfort her. I started awkwardly putting an arm around her when another student came up to me, getting right in my face. I got up and faced him. He was shorter, probably younger than me, and didn't say a word. It soon became apparent he was stronger, though, and I backed off in the direction of the teacher's desk.
Thanks to dream logic, there was a gun on said desk, so I grabbed it and pointed it at him.
Pretty much everyone in the room, including the teacher, was watching this going down by now, too.
For some reason I thought "that's to easy" and threw the gun out the window. Then I (somehow) beat the snot out of him, and started a revolution against the school's cruel and oppressive teachers and military police.
Then we lived happily ever after. It actually trailed off after some lengthy and confusing NSFW bits and I got lost in a seemingly endless underground warehouse full of stepladders and coping saws.

[Itnetlolor]

Had a rather depressing dream. How would you feel if the very dream girls you have met and known (and connected to all levels, like best friends; especially when reality gave you none), along with a crew/clan of dream friends and such (to literally hundreds of them) were to suddenly announce their resignation from being around you (let's say, you were their captain/patriarch/Alpha friend), and decided to part ways; from friends to lovers, all of them, all of a sudden, decide they no longer respect you, no longer love you, and just decide to up and leave, but not without saying their goodbyes first? At least, they didn't kick me on the ground like most others do/would(n't hesitate to).

A lingering pain in my chest, and some rather persistent dark rings under my eyes, especially after that dream, was in the process of disappearing after witnessing it. In a sense, it felt like the end of an era for me (and one these people in the dreams agreed upon ending), and a significant one while at it (half my life, gone, in a blink); like accepting my fate in going to Hell, and belonging there. I just hope it was a bad nightmare of the ultimate abandonment. If it holds any water then, then what can be done to me that life hasn't already tossed my way?

In all honesty, I don't like where this path leads; and in all preference, I reject that reality, and substitute my own. I'm through with being punished for being happy; especially after being nothing but good/benevolent to people (may be a tad biased, but still. Close enough.).

EDIT:
I hope it was a test of character; because even though I suffered such an unjust and harsh punishment for being myself and/or happy, I still accepted my fate of total abandonment without struggle. Then again, I've been accustomed to this since birth; or at least, my first days of school. Given the general scope of recent events, I feel like my faith has been tested on/from all angles, time and again (quite frequently, actually), like maintaining/checking a vehicle before selling it as a used car. I think God's been trying to call BS on me, probably due to my calling Him out so much, and He's pissed off that I keep passing His tests with flying colors. Considering I feel like nothing else is left to lose (What I take personal value towards), I say bring it on. I can take on more abuse; I'm used to it. A sympathy for the Devil didn't come from nowhere, after all. I mean, isn't that a test of ultimate forgiveness that more, especially religious, people fail than you'd think? On that note, being mistaken, by name alone, as a devil-child, despite the name actually meaning Caretaker, your whole existence doesn't help.

EDIT EDIT:
To think again about it with a fresher mind, maybe it's me, but they did seem to act extraordinarily out of character. It was like, they were not themselves. Courteous their goodbyes were, this was completely out of left field, and nobody, despite their unique traits, had the sense they usually use. It was like they were possessed, or affected by something, or were protecting me from something I probably could not handle, and to protect me, they had to hate me; or outright refuse me. Despite being dream characters, and having known them via dreams as much as I have, it's weird, but I have faith that this odd behavior is to be trusted as something part of a greater plan. I mean, in the sudden depression, and sudden relief after said dream, it got me thinking. I mean, what if the disconnect that was done was part of doing what would equal hitting a reset button on me (or a psycho-defibrillation)? Like resetting a Wi-Fi, Disconnect for a few seconds, plug it back in, and wait for it to cold boot. With a flushing of the RAM or some such, everything's back in order. Like when a computer acts up, restart after letting it cool down for a bit, completely shut off (provided it was a software issue; which in a dream-sense, would make sense). I mean, after years of being gone from mind, and being back only to leave again? That's a hell of an uncharacteristic dick move for them to pull. Something has to be up in that dream world. Might have to go Psychonauts on this, and investigate. Something didn't seem right about it; too uncanny. I mean, if something horror movie-ish is going on with that realm, at least I have the genre savviness to recognize a problem, and start investigating it, and with a calmer and more rational mindset. If it's something self-made, then what kind of beast developed this time?

[RekkaAtsuma]

BIZARRE BAZAAR:
One of my best friends was helping me learn to drive, we had visited a food place, using obviously rotten core ingredients in their food, we refused the food, they refused to even speak to us, on the way out my friend handed me the keys to their car and said "Take me to Ole Foamy"
Thing is between us and Ole Foamy was a huge freeway known for cops busting you if so much as you don't blinker when proper, like prison time busting you. I hesitated, my freind was encouraging, i said "Uh yeah....one issue: I don't have a license or insurance proof" my freind said "Oh well....then we're walking"
We were then running down the sidewalk of some neighborhood on our hands and tip-toes like Ravenous Bloodfiend vampires in order to train for me driving....(At this time I could hear laughter)
We get to the place Ole Foamy is, which Ole Foamy winds out being a Janitor at a School for the socially awkward and bizarre, we arrive there btw, on our hands and tiptoes, I look up at the most-sane looking student who's got a huge WTF look, and I say "Training to drive."  they say "Welcome to B1Z4RR3 B4Z44r, the wi-fi code is B34c0n*"
So we meet up with Ole Foamy who is "Janitoring" a baby's back side with a grocery sack (i have at this point been hearing giggles of joy in the background)
OF asks my buddy to move his Janitor's mop bucket and My friend throws the lever and is then wisked away on a run-away automatic Janitor's mop Bucket at thunderous speed.
My friend finally returns, SOPPPING WET HEAD TO TOE, and looks at Ole Foamy and exclaims "NARBO BAZED BUUUBLY CAHN-JRI-OI BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO."(random simolish)
(I woke up LAUGHING MY BUTT OFF)

(((I think I've had too much ESO, RWBY and Sims3 here lately.)))

[Eric Blank]

Last night I had the strangest dream I've had in a while. I was mucking about an apartment building with an external elevator going to 3 of like ~12 floors. It had only one button. A man got in the elevator on the top floor where I was hanging out and I noticed the elevator cable was just a wee little bungee cord, so I immediately thought about cutting it and making the fool plummet to his death. Then I realized that would be murder, because this wasn't a game, which for some reason I had been treating it as up until that very moment. (I am apparently a psychopath in my dreams)
Then I go down to the parking lot to a van that was down there with my family wandering around it, eating popcorn. I get in the van looking for something, and find that there is a black lunchbag sitting against the rear hatch of the van, with the sounds of cooking popcorn emanating from it as it bounced around slightly. Magical popcorn-cooking lunchbag get. Then I see there is half a block of cheddar cheese in the trunk in front of it. When i pick it up it is halfway to molten. I turn around, and in the front seat, staring back at me with the biggest, most bugged-out eyes imaginable is a scrawny woman with short-cropped hair in a grey hoodie. She says, and I quote; "the cheese is for you..." staring at me like I'm an angry bear or something.

So that was a massive wtf.

Dream changed after that, went on to designing a huge dome-shaped building divided into four quadrants. One of which was inhabited by me and my family, and another by the mafia or some shit. I was monkeying around in the mafia's quadrant of the house, saw them down below, and decided that instead of taking the stairs like a sensible human being I would use this strange tree-like sculpture of purple-tinted metal as a fire pole and slide down to talk to them. They take me with them out into the wilderness, up a mountain, looking for something. They left me to guard the trucks and went off, borrowing my backpack for something. There was a bear off the trail there that stood there the entire time and growled menacingly, but otherwise left me alone. When the gangsters came back they had a lot less gear, my pack among what was missing. We went back to town, and I discussed it with my family before we went back out to investigate what they were doing. following the trail, we found my backpack and overturned earth. The backpack had my wallet in it (!?!?) and they had buried something there.

Back at the house there was a staircase leading down into the caverns. The DF caverns. The gangsters went down there, we called the cops (who turned into dwarven soldiers and the dream was suddenly all in ASCII!?) and followed them, and I woke up in the middle of a melee wherein we attempted to apprehend the gangsters.