Ok, so I was gonna start a prequel narration to the actual fort right? Well I was looking through Legends to see who the current king was, and I happen upon these gems:
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ImageShack.usso first off, this kid is clearly illegitamate to begin with, them not being able to figure out who her mom is and all, apparently the shame of this fact caused the then fishery worker to sell her to the gobbos, who then brainwashed her, and put her to work as a baby snatcher...but it gets BETTER, because then she runs off with the first handsome night creature that offers to turn her into a horrid monstrosity and make terror babies with her. Now Mr. Fishery Worker somehow managed to hide this fact long enough to run for the big chair....AND WON..... and we though George W. Bush was good at tampering with the election
So yeah between a crazy royal line and the face melty properties of practically the entire universe, this place is gonna have some EPIC backstory behind it XD
EDIT FOR EXTRA EPIC: Just looked up old king mysteryspouses OTHER daughter, the one that DIDNT fall in with horrid monsters of the night and I'm not going to say anything bad about her because...well see for yourself-
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ImageShack.usShe was born in year seven...and two years later SHE FOUGHT OFF A TROLL!!!!!!!!!!! APPARENTLY SHE THREW HER PACIFIER AT ITS WEAK POINT FOR MASSIVE DAMAGE!!!!!!
I mean seriously....what the crap....oh and then 5 years later the little badass tyke DID IT AGAIN....and then she joined up with a civ AND STARTED HUNTING MEGABEASTS PROFESSIONALLY...AT FOURTEEN YEARS OLD....HOLY CRAPMUNCH....
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ImageShack.usHeres her list of kills....she eventually got killed by a dragon but then at that point she had pretty much FOUGHT EVERYTHING ELSE IN THE UNIVERSE.....IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FOREST OF MELTFACE......so yeah I cant really hold that one against her...now we need to get someone to draw a pic of 2 year old UristMcBadassBaby throwing her pacifier at 300mph to a trolls face.