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Author Topic: Post your Failafacts here!  (Read 5441 times)

itg

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #30 on: August 19, 2012, 05:06:04 pm »

I don't get why peeps hate artifact floodgates and doors. They're indestructible, so they can be used for sensitive areas, as building destroyers cannot destroy them. Special exception being HFS, which, I THINK, is capable of deconstructing artifact stuff, but not destroying artifact stuff.

Correct me if I am wrong.
Building destroyers don't actually "destroy" doors and floodgates - they basically remove them from the hinges. Thus, they can deconstruct artifact furniture.

I've had the HFS go to town on regular artifact furniture (a weapon stand, to be precise) for seasons at a time without deconstructing it, and I've had an artifact door hold up to various FBs for years. My theory is that artifact floodgates can be deconstructed because they're typically paired with a non-artifact mechanism. A few tests come to mind (floodgate without mechanism, door with mechanism, floodgate/door with artifact mechanism, etc). Has anyone done any real research on this subject?

Ubiq

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #31 on: August 19, 2012, 05:09:43 pm »

My Armorer claimed a metalworkshop
I just got a masterwork Bismuth Tiara
Fuck.

Was it a Possession or did you at least get a Legendary Armorer out of the deal?
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Hurize

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #32 on: August 19, 2012, 05:12:40 pm »

My Armorer claimed a metalworkshop
I just got a masterwork Bismuth Tiara
Fuck.

Was it a Possession or did you at least get a Legendary Armorer out of the deal?
It was a fey mood
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The amount of malice in this thread is actually causing me some concern. I mean, chaining up mothers and forcing them to breed, just so we can drown their children to harvest their organs? Does this strike no one else as absolutely horrific?
You misspelled 'hilarious'

Ubiq

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #33 on: August 19, 2012, 05:34:22 pm »

I wouldn't complain too much then; it's a largely useless trinket (I would assume anyway as I don't know what the armor stats for a tiara are) made out of a otherwise unusable metal, but at least you can crank out plenty of masterwork items from now on.

That and it's also better than a solitary low boot made out of tin, which is what a Possessed Armorer gifted me with once.
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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #34 on: August 19, 2012, 07:10:17 pm »

Give it to your CoTG. It's better than anything s/he'd have anyways...
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Sig
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[GreatWyrmGold] gets a little crown. May it forever be his mark of Cain; let no one argue pointless subjects with him lest they receive the same.

krenshala

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #35 on: August 19, 2012, 07:33:29 pm »

My Armorer claimed a metalworkshop
I just got a masterwork Bismuth Tiara
Fuck.
Was it his armorsmithing or metalsmithing skill that went up from the fey mood?  I'm guessing metalsmithing since its a tiara (aka, a girly crown :D ).
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Quote from: Haspen
Quote from: phoenixuk
Zepave Dawnhogs the Butterfly of Vales the Marsh Titan ... was taken out by a single novice axedwarf and his pet war kitten. Long Live Domas Etasastesh Adilloram, slayer of the snow butterfly!
Doesn't quite have the ring of heroics to it...
Mother: "...and after the evil snow butterfly was defeated, Domas and his kitten lived happily ever after!"
Kids: "Yaaaay!"

GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #36 on: August 19, 2012, 08:03:57 pm »

I'm guessing tiaras are a custom kind of hat, which would suggest armoring was increased. Also, he referred to him as an armorer.
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Are you a GM with players who haven't posted? TheDelinquent Players Help will have Bay12 give you an action!
[GreatWyrmGold] gets a little crown. May it forever be his mark of Cain; let no one argue pointless subjects with him lest they receive the same.

Hurize

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #37 on: August 19, 2012, 09:51:23 pm »

I'm guessing tiaras are a custom kind of hat, which would suggest armoring was increased. Also, he referred to him as an armorer.

Yeah, I got a master Armorer, but i only got a crappy tiara
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The amount of malice in this thread is actually causing me some concern. I mean, chaining up mothers and forcing them to breed, just so we can drown their children to harvest their organs? Does this strike no one else as absolutely horrific?
You misspelled 'hilarious'

Argus_Mccray

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #38 on: August 19, 2012, 10:36:24 pm »

I just had this beauty created in my fort.

Kathillelum Gemur Ok, "Wetwanes the Prestige of Fingers", a palm crutch

This is a palm crutch. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is encrusted with oval magnetite cabochons and trillion cut schorls, decorated with acacia and encircled with bands of iron, rectangular granite cabochons and round magnetite cabochons. This object menaces with spikes of palm and iron. on the item is an image of square brilliant cut gems in palm. One the item is an image of Kib Yellsmines the dwarf and a wild boar bone bolt in magnetite. Kib Yellsmines is raising the wild boar bone bolt. The artwork relates to the addition of a masterful image "The Honey of Snarls" in dingo bone to wild boar bone bolt by the dwarf Kib Yellsmines for the Eviscerated Portals at Factiongranite in the midwinter of 256.

At least it was a fey mood... Stupid thing is valued at 61200 dorfbucks. /facepalm
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Sus

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #39 on: August 20, 2012, 02:24:23 am »


This is a NERF™ squeaky mallet. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality and why the fuck did you waste perfectly good candy on this?!  >:(
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Certainly you could argue that DF is a lot like The Sims, only... you know... with more vomit and decapitation.
If you launch a wooden mine cart towards the ocean at a sufficient speed, you can have your entire dwarf sail away in an ark.

WJLIII3

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #40 on: August 20, 2012, 08:24:24 am »

My Armorer claimed a metalworkshop
I just got a masterwork Bismuth Tiara
Fuck.

I'm confused about the profanity. Have you never seen bismuth? That is the coolest artifact I've ever heard of. When I am King, I'll make one.
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krenshala

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #41 on: August 20, 2012, 08:39:13 am »


This is a NERF™ squeaky mallet. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality and why the fuck did you waste perfectly good candy on this?!  >:(
Obviously, he wants your Hammerer to stop killing people every time he distributes Justice.
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Quote from: Haspen
Quote from: phoenixuk
Zepave Dawnhogs the Butterfly of Vales the Marsh Titan ... was taken out by a single novice axedwarf and his pet war kitten. Long Live Domas Etasastesh Adilloram, slayer of the snow butterfly!
Doesn't quite have the ring of heroics to it...
Mother: "...and after the evil snow butterfly was defeated, Domas and his kitten lived happily ever after!"
Kids: "Yaaaay!"

PaleBlueHammer

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #42 on: August 20, 2012, 08:39:58 am »


This is a NERF™ squeaky mallet. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality and why the fuck did you waste perfectly good candy on this?!  >:(

Pale blue hammers are not totally useless!   :P
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Quote from: misko27
If adamantine is revealed for more then 2 years without being completely mined it all turns into galena. Useless, Useless Galena.

Supersheepman

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #43 on: August 20, 2012, 09:26:52 am »

I've had loads. My most recent was a birch floodgate called Ararak, which was adorned with rings of birch, menaced with spikes of birch and had pictures of gems etched into it in birch.

Others included gold chain leggings, an alder table with clear zircon, ruby and birch (which instantly made my Mayor's "Office" into a "Royal Throne Room") and a golden gauntlet.

Most of those came from this fortress I had a while back, in which the only metal I could find was Native Gold. If that wasn't enough to make my artifacts shitty, pretty much all of them came from a Possessed Mood, so I got next to nothing out of the deal anyway. Needless to say, that fortress fell pretty quickly. The only weapons we had were crossbows and that which we looted from dead goblins. In the space of one day, I was sieged twice. The third was enough to finish it off.
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Nathail

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Re: Post your Failafacts here!
« Reply #44 on: August 20, 2012, 05:35:40 pm »

I'm quite new to Dwarf Fortress Mode, so I've only gotten one artifact. It was a flute made out of some low value green gem. It menaced with spikes of the same gem. Not only did it start summoning kobold thieves, who I had no means of dealing with since the military was still a big cloud of WTF (menacing with spikes of WTF), but it would have been excruciatingly painful to play. I should probably have "gifted" it to the Elves. Bring down their entire civilization with infected finger wounds.
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