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Author Topic: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles  (Read 578798 times)

Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1740 on: July 11, 2013, 05:09:08 am »

So I finally made it home, and with the tweaks from dfhack such as fast-heat helping, I'm managing between 30-40 FPS so we're playable, cracked open the save and took and in-depth look, and as it stands, the aquifer is draining into the caverns, several Z levels have patterns that can only be described as "interpretative dance", and I'm getting a headache trying to figure out what is what.

I do believe Horrorfail has managed to surpass Failcannon as the most convoluted fort yet built ...

I'll get a real update written in a few hours once I finally get heads/tails of this place figured out ...

Failcannon is impossible to surpass LONG LIVE FAILCANNON

on a side note I request a turn and a dwarf:book keeper or manager or the like if not possible a mechanic or stonecrafter named Spiral I or Spirallances I, preferably
« Last Edit: July 11, 2013, 05:10:41 am by Spirallances_ »
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Ah ha.  Spirallances...
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the1337doofus

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1741 on: July 11, 2013, 08:21:51 pm »

Failcannon is impossible to surpass LONG LIVE FAILCANNON

on a side note I request a turn and a dwarf:book keeper or manager or the like if not possible a mechanic or stonecrafter named Spiral I or Spirallances I, preferably

Dat sig
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Quote from: /k/
Multiple babies means that the force is distributed per baby, so less force total per baby.
burning dwarves is a sign of productivity

Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1742 on: July 11, 2013, 11:28:07 pm »

"This is a signature all craftdwarfship is of the highest quality.
On the item is a picture of a plump helmet man he is surrounded by plump helmets.
The artwork refers to the job cancellation of "plant plump helmet:needs plump helmet spawn" in the year forever in every fortress ever.
On the item is a picture of a dwaf the dwarf is stark raving mad the artwork refers to Urist Mcplanter going stark raving mad due to lack of plump helmet spawn in the year every year in the fortress of Spirallances."

This signature is not of my origin it was actually created by LordSlowpoke I just for the life of me can't find it to actually quote it not that the whole thing would fit in under 200 characters I just merely edited it and changed a few things.
« Last Edit: July 11, 2013, 11:30:24 pm by Spirallances_ »
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Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1743 on: July 13, 2013, 02:26:05 am »

I am led to believe that horrorfailed has died risen back from the dead and is now having a party in hell drinking the blood of elves and eating elf flesh only the finest foods a dwarf can enjoy I also imagine that TAD killed the devil and is now masquerading around as the devil
That's the only thing that would make sense in his fort
___________________________________________________________________________________
"Just as planed"
« Last Edit: July 13, 2013, 04:38:00 pm by Spirallances_ »
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Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1744 on: July 13, 2013, 06:22:06 pm »

I suppose that instead of spiral or Spirallances my dwarf should be named

Joseph McCarthy

Every good fort needs someone running around screaming COMMIES THEY'RE EVERYWHERE.
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Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1745 on: July 16, 2013, 08:11:27 pm »

I think that horrorfailed has fallen in to the black hole dragging along the rest of the forums.
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laularukyrumo

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1746 on: July 16, 2013, 10:56:38 pm »

I'm pretty sure the past forts had periods like this. It happens. It'll pass.
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Quote from: Dwarfotaur
Everytime one of my militia has given birth in the Danger Room, it's lead to instant baby smoothies for everyone.

Gotta Catch 'Em All!

Dat Sig Thread

Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1747 on: July 16, 2013, 11:56:43 pm »

NINE NINE NINE TIS ALL OVER ITS ALL OVER- famous last words a German dwarf
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Spish

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1748 on: July 17, 2013, 02:15:39 am »

Oi, Joh, its been almost a week since you picked up the save. Any progress?
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Ah, yes, I thought something was amiss. Now I see. There's not enough terrible things in the lakes.

Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1749 on: July 20, 2013, 07:35:50 am »

Everyone is dead and gone there is nothing but emptiness in the dark post-apoctaliptic land other than some cake a presumably homicidal robot and !!SCIENCE!!
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arcangelsd

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1750 on: July 20, 2013, 10:17:31 am »

Aaaand another soul claimed.
How many left before this one goes sentient too?
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Did we just made reality itself commit suicide?
I think that sentence describes all of Failcannon.

Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1751 on: July 20, 2013, 10:19:53 am »

 I think the fort conditions got so bad that he just killed himself
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Temporarily9

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1752 on: July 20, 2013, 02:41:56 pm »

Oh dear, it's steadily approaching my turn. Hope the FPS issue is fixed by then.
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Spirallances_

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1753 on: July 20, 2013, 03:31:05 pm »

Perhaps your pc wont over dose on pills and slit it's wrists or maybe it will
« Last Edit: July 28, 2013, 11:02:39 pm by Spirallances_ »
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neotemplar

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles
« Reply #1754 on: July 20, 2013, 10:41:58 pm »

Ok so someone sent me the save and I guess this means I signed up for a turn and in addition that it is my turn.

Notably, I've not been following the thread but that shouldn't be a problem at all! :P

(I'll just use that for my writing voice.)

I'll DLL this thing and see what I can do.  (FPS shouldn't be an issue, I've run 1k+ animal forts before. My only issue is I'll need to get this thing done rapidly as Shin Megami Tenshi IV is currently transiting to my home in the mail.)

Neotemplar strides into the fortress.
"Well this is confusing... Where the heck is everything?  Noone has built a thing on the surface? Shameful!  I shall rectify this situation immediately!"

Then Neotemplar saw that there were no stone blocks, but lo! There was much wood!  And so he bade forth the dwarves that they might build a meadhall upon stilts lest the skeletal reindeer on the nearby hill interfere.

"it appears someone named Foo Quuxman has been misssing for a week, but noone will tell me why."  "It also appears that it is Autumn, how odd that my years starts in this month."

27 Limestone:
Part of the hall foundation was suspended today due to the discovery of a domestic wolf corpse...

"On further inspection, the corpses were not blocking the site but instead were up and chasing the workers.  How upsetting, very well, I shall do what I must.  We will excavate a chamber underground and build a wooden structure within it!"

"Dwarven Decree #1  Miners shalt not haul, or they shalt do no real work."

"Dwarven Decree #2 Mass miner conscription for stage 1."

"Dwarve Decree #3 Cut every tree in sight!"

"Oh look migrant arrived, well guys I hate to tell you this but I don't know how to open the doors.  If you can find a way in your asses are getting conscripted for my project.  if you can't find a path you can just enjoy the wildlife out there."

"Oh look, there's some vomit covered ice making the moat passable.  Any who can survive the undead gauntlet and get inside the trap field are welcome!"

"Aerie, a beekeeper is killed trying to foolishly welcome the migrants, or more likely trying to steal socks off of one of their corpses."

"Also a child died.  I guess we should hold a party."

"ok too many dwarves are wandering outside time to build a lever and shut a bridge."

"A child and two babies went missing.  Excellent news!."

"Bad news.  Emeraldwind and Sabretache have gone missing.  Really need to get that lever set up to wall off the outside and stop these deaths from the vomit ice bridge letting undead in and dwarves out."

"Sethrist gave birth to a baby girl today" 10th Timber

"Due to limitations of time and resources, the new dining area will instead be somewhat more original in design."

15th Timber:
"It appears that some of the dwarven merchants have wandered through something unpleasant. A merchant, a hammer dwarf, and a donkey have full body blisters.  Also it is snowing today."

"Someone with the title "mysterious possession survivor" was found dead.  Unlike all recent deaths this occurred within the fort so the cause is a mystery.  All other deaths having been caused by undead gang beatings."

24th Moonstone:
Armegedoncounseler has withdrawn from society!

An artifact Sylvite Scepter is created. It is called Delight Budded and is pretty lame, excepting spikes of coal, which MENACE.

"Strangely enough the random deaths seem to have halted.  I theorize that either A. All the undead finally got caged in the trap field near the vomit ice crossing.  B. We ran out of tombs and thus noone is wandering out to bury things and getting killed. (Also disabled a few people's hauling for burial duty.)"

Project Status:
The main areas are dug out and the central points are smoothed.  Engraving the main floor is taking place.  Installed artifact trap to rocket up room value.  Installing basic stone tables as many were in supply.  No chairs were available so I'm building all new ones out of solid silver.  These are taking a long time because there is only one forge, may rectify this soonish.

Also a forgotten beast appeared, but its trapped in the caverns and thus no one cares about it.

Early Spring:
Small tragedies, Doof and ShadowDragon have both died of OLD AGE?!?!?  That seems to be quite the accomplishment at this fortress.

In addition there have been three goblin ambushes, all of which got to play reindeer games... UNDEAD REINDEER GAMES.

And then a giant Salt Crocodile appeared in the caves.  No not a saltwater crocodile, one made entirely of SALT.

A magma crab entered from the forge area (presumably) and spit basalt at the resident vampire, bruising them a bit.  I called in the military and the crazy cat lady beat its head in with the pommel of her steel battle axe.

28th Granite:
Nexusv the vampire was found dead today.  Based on the recordings I uncovered it appears that that crab had smashed his spine and ribcage and that this lead to his death.

A feathered ribbon worm appears in the caves.  Official recommendation from me is that we never open them again.

Hunter has been taken by a fey mood!

Mr. Syde has been missing for a week, there are no combat reports so I don't know what happened to him.

Having used up all available silver, throne construction has been moved to zinc!

Hunter creates a native copper coffin about the slaying of a Giant.

Mr. Syde was located on 28 Felsite, dead of dehydration.  He appears to have died in the hospital.

Soon after "Signhere" was found dead, evidence shows this is another magma crab slaying.  Neotemplar notes that this is why he pumps the magma into isolated pockets before setting up forges.
« Last Edit: July 21, 2013, 03:08:03 pm by neotemplar »
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If not under Neotemplar look for Vellum.

<22:07:06> "Terry": If a kid is old enough to play D&D
<22:07:20> "Terry": A kid is old enough to experience a dolphin being strangled
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