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Author Topic: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell - Please do not feed the nobles  (Read 577797 times)

Mr Space Cat

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell (BATTLEFAILED 4) - Ghost Fortress
« Reply #195 on: August 24, 2012, 07:45:15 pm »

--snippy snip--

EDIT 5: My dwarf went to "attend a meeting" with expedition leader TAD. In Horrofailed, meeting the expedition leader means hitting them. Multiple times.

You mean this isn't how meetings with your superiors are supposed to go?
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Teneb

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell (BATTLEFAILED 4) - Ghost Fortress
« Reply #196 on: August 24, 2012, 07:48:35 pm »

Deathsword's Log

Overseer Entry 1

I was starting the whole aquifer piercing process when migrants arrived. Then zombies arrived and attacked the migrants while they swam through the goo fields.

Two got in, Strategia and Dijonralo. They do not look very good, however, and are stinking up the place with their miasma, so I had them quarantined.

Overseer Entry 2

While we were relocating the entrance, a kobold commando squad infiltrated the fort! They were bloated and sick like the two migrants, but they still managed to put up a fight. The little bastards killed Volfgarix and EmeraldWind. Curse those vermin!

Overseer Entry 3

Sethrist had an... outburst today. He mauled a dog with his pick right in the middle of the dining room, stopping just short of killing the poor beast. He seems oddly happy right now. He'll have to be watched.

Overseer Entry 4

We unlocked the quarantined sector to find the corpses of the two we locked in there. Dijonralo looks like he was murdered, though.

Mego approached me today, said something about "author wanking". Who does he think I am, a human? I don't wank. Ever.

Overseer Entry 5

Against all expectations, three babies were born. They were named Urist Imiknorris, Space and Ashsaber. Their births seemed to better the overall mood of the fort, so I won't complain.

Nah, who am I kidding, Dark_T_Zeratul snapped and broke Sethrist's leg before Eric managed to kill him. Everyone feels like crap right now.

Overseer Entry 6

Apparently, an elven caravan was lingering on the edges of our territory. Was. An undead ogre seemed to take offence and murdered them all. We need their goods, however, so we'll just tunnel under them and collapse the ground where the goods lay. What could go wrong?

Overseer Entry 7

Fuck. Two flying birds got in and smeared their filthy goo over crippled Sethrist and poor Eric. They lived long enough to kill these rotting intruders. I guess we won't miss them for long, their ghosts should appear soon.

Overseer Entry 8

I don't know who did it, but a containment wall was torn down for it's wood. Turns out it was blocking a breach into the surface. Zombies poured in from the breach and we rushed to defeat them and seal that infernal hole. Mego was killed by a zombie, and during the ensuing confusion TAD murdered Splint. Why Aussie? Why?

When I asked her what poor Splint did to her to deserve death, she just laughed at me. So I punched her. I guess that is all the justice that'll be done regarding this.

Overkiller Entry 9

I can't sleep. Splint's death keeps haunting me, murdered in cold blood by Aussie. Dwarven justice dictates that murderers are to recieve 50 hammer strikes. Well, I don't have a hammer, but I have a pick. And all residents of Horrorfailed are criminals. Today, justice will be done.

Overkiller Entry 10



KILL! MAIM! BURN! ALL CRIMINALS SHALL DIE! FOR I AM THE LAW!

Aussie was the first to meet true justice! And what a glorious justice it was! Killed in her sleep, as helpless as Splint was! Gizogin and Newbunkle tried to stop me. They are dead. NONE CAN STOP THE MIGHTY PICK OF DWARVEN JUSTICE! NONE I SAY! A couple others tried to stop me. They died. The babies carry the stain of their mothers crime, so they were CLEANSED as well. The dogs too, for not even animals are above LAW AND JUSTICE!

They all died. All but one. Arcangelsd. He is hiding somewhere in the fort. I will find him. And I will KILL him. For justice. And for the Blood God.

EndDEATH of log.
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Monstrous Manual: D&D in DF
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What if “slammed in the ass by dead philosophers” is actually the thing which will progress our culture to the next step?

EmeraldWind

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Re: Horrorfailed the Battle-Cannon of Hell (BATTLEFAILED 4) - Ghost Fortress
« Reply #197 on: August 24, 2012, 07:57:16 pm »

EDIT 5: My dwarf went to "attend a meeting" with expedition leader TAD. In Horrofailed, meeting the expedition leader means hitting them. Multiple times.

I think El Presidente in Hellcannon rewrote that definition a while back... "attend a meeting" seems to mean "someone's getting their ass kicked, do not disturb" now.
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Nexusv

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Requesting redorfing.
Spoiler: Redorf Stuff (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: August 24, 2012, 08:20:25 pm by Nexusv »
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[ETHIC:NO_CONTRIB:JUSTIFIED_IF_GOOD_REASON]

ThatAussieGuy

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The Aussie Journal - Some time in 502/3

Splint found my journal and had to be silenced.  Can't have the test subjects knowing the variables of their experiment.  I thought I got away with killing her while the others were busy dealing with the wall I removed as a distraction, but alas someone spotted me.

----

Next Entry

Dumping Splint's corpse in my bed seemed to pay off - Deathsword came roaring into the dormitories with a pick in hand and drove it right through my bed.  Thankfully he decided to drive it through where my head would've been, or he might've hit me - I'd had to hide under the bed because he came sooner than expected.  It sounds like he's gone on a rampage and is killing the others now.  I think I'll just stay here...

Fortress is expanding slower than anticipated due to setbacks.  Losses within acceptable parameters, though primary projects are delayed indefinitely until a stable and safe population is achieved.

blarg552

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So, the fort has died once and already almost died a second time. ...my god, the embark territory is so evil even the -fort- has been zombified.
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Dinjoralo

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I'd complain about you getting my name wrong, but with a name that exists in no language, real, Dwarf Fortress, or anywhere else, it's understandable.
Also, I have an idea...
Spoiler: ZEE IDEA (click to show/hide)
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Teneb

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DidI say the fort is dead in that update? No, I didn't. Arcagelsd is crippled, but alive, in a side room being pestered by ghosts while my dwarf patrols the main hall. Also, migrants arrived, but there is no way to let them in (also, zombies). Will Arcangelsd survive? Will the migrants get in? Will a murderous ghost kill me? We'll find out next time.

EDIT: Dinjoralo, I only messed your name in this update. Your dwarf had the correct one during his brief life.
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Monstrous Manual: D&D in DF
Quote from: Tack
What if “slammed in the ass by dead philosophers” is actually the thing which will progress our culture to the next step?

ThatAussieGuy

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DidI say the fort is dead in that update? No, I didn't. Arcagelsd is crippled, but alive, in a side room being pestered by ghosts while my dwarf patrols the main hall. Also, migrants arrived, but there is no way to let them in (also, zombies). Will Arcangelsd survive? Will the migrants get in? Will a murderous ghost kill me? We'll find out next time.

EDIT: Dinjoralo, I only messed your name in this update. Your dwarf had the correct one during his brief life.

I've got two socks and a kitten skull that say Archangelsd gets murdered by ghosts before the next update

Splint

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Man, I lost track of what was happening and I'm already dead. Poop. (I lost track because I figured at the rate things were going it'd be an endless stream of embark parties dying. :\)

Mr Space Cat

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Woo, dorfed as a baby and killed soon afterwards! Someone grab my corpse and bash a zombie's skull in with it before you bury me. Baby me never got a chance to do something dorfy.

Also, LAAAAAW!

I'm, uh, gonna get a re-dorfing later, right? Same name, profession, all that stuff. (If Horrorfailed survives that long, at least. :P)
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Eric Blank

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Well, that went better than expected.

If there comes an available space, I want another dorf.
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Splint

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I fully expect this civ to become accidently in fairly short order.

Eric Blank

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CatalystParadox's turn: I accidentally a whole civ!
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I make Spellcrafts!
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Mr Frog

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Whew, only 14 pages so far. Hopefully I can actually get caught up this time (I tried to survive all the way through Hellcannon, but was claimed by the madness around page 75).
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