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Yes

38 (90.5%)

No

4 (9.5%)

Total Members Voted: 42

Voting closed: August 25, 2012, 01:11:14 am

[Amber Wolf]

K

[Gunner-Chan]

For the love of god yes. Threataning to kill you should be the end of any relationship, no matter what. And all that other shit leads up to someone just not worth being around with. They don't actually care about you, you're an object for them to own. Not a person.

Seriously, get with your parents or hook back up with a friend for safety and call the cops. That guy sounds dangerous or unstable.

And yes TRY and talk with older friends about this too. If you explain I'm very sure anyone would understand. This is a terrible thing to happen to someone.

[Scelly9]

No talking or hanging out with the opposite gender unless its family

Oh, good god. If he's this controlling from the start, that should be a massive warning sign. Call the cops, break up.

[Gunner-Chan]

Yeah I forgot to mention that one. If anyone EVER brings that up or says it, things will not work. Even at it's best that line of thought implies a massive lack of willingness to trust you. I'm not exactly one to talk since I can be a green eyed monster sometimes, but I have never even thought of trying to inflict that on someone else.

[Corai]

End it, now. I have no experience with relationships but he made you get rid of your friends, make you get rid of your dog & threatened to kill you.


HE IS TERRIBLE.

[Bdthemag]

Didn't you make a thread regarding this a little bit ago? You said in the thread prior that you cheated on him first, and basically told us that you were equally controlling of your boyfriend? Among other things, your profile then stated that you were 17, and you then changed it to 41 after someone pointed out you were 17.

I'm wondering, are you just doing this for attention and for people to feel sympathetic towards you? Because you got quite a few practical pieces of advice from the last thread.

[Scelly9]

Didn't you make a thread regarding this a little bit ago? You said in the thread prior that you cheated on him first, and basically told us that you were equally controlling of your boyfriend? Among other things, your profile then stated that you were 17, and you then changed it to 41 after someone pointed out you were 17.

I'm pretty sure your looking at post count.

[weenog]

From what you've said, you aren't the only victim here.  You aren't treating him right either.  Of course noticing little things like taking your age out of your profile* when somebody calls it up as relevant to life experience suggests (to me anyway) that you'll probably try to manipulate us here at the forums, too.

Yes, you should break up with him.  Two good reasons, pick whichever one you like:

• Neither one of you is trustworthy.
• You take this relationship so lightly you're tying it to a poll on an internet forum.

This is not a healthy relationship and neither of you are healthy people.  Quit inflicting yourselves on each other and seek professional or spiritual help or some job and living space where you don't have to interact with other people.  It's very difficult and hurtful for most people to be completely isolated, so you're probably best off looking for some help to get your heart and your mind right, rather than quarantine.

RE: Depression, sticking with him for fear of being alone is going to make that worse, not better.  You don't improve your own morale by reinforcing the idea that you can't make it on your own.

*: The 41 is her post count, Bd.  The N/A is her age.

[MrWiggles]

This is Amber Wolf third thread on the topic of her horribly dysfunctional and abusive relationship. FYI.

[i2amroy]

Gotta agree with what weenog said here, all of it.

Also as has been mentioned by both Janet and Scelly9, any relationship that includes the rule:

No talking or hanging out with the opposite gender unless its family

is pretty much doomed to fail at the beginning. I mean for god sakes even doing something as non-relationship based as going to school or work is impossible to do without interacting with the opposite sex at some point. Plus the less controlling and more trust you are able to place in somebody in a relationship, and the easier it will be to stay in that relationship. A relationship where neither of you trusts the other will only last for as long as you can fend off the constrictions, but one where you can trust the other can last much longer.

Lastly I am unable to tell your age as you have N/A listed, but I'm going to say that the current scenario that you have outlined sounds like late junior high through early high school to me. If you are that age I would highly suggest that you start working on how to stay true to whoever you choose, because until you are able to do that it's going to be very difficult to find somebody who is willing to stay true to you. Also not to be cruel or anything, but from what it sounds like it seems as if he was right when he said that he wanted to just be friends, though at this point you might not even be able to swing that, as it sounds like it's gone a fair bit past the "stay friends" point by now. The first stage of learning to be true to somebody is learning to recognize when a relationship isn't working anymore, and the fact that one of you "needs a break from the other" is generally a good sign. While a short time apart may work in long term (think multi-year here), the shorter a relationship is the more "needing a break" is a sign that something isn't working as it should. As soon as one of you starts to feel that way it should be an immediate sign that you need to either change something, or that maybe the relationship just isn't meant to work out after all.

[Kamin]

Just like on the other threads, my thought stays the same. The poll is in line with that thought. A little growing up wouldn't hurt, either--the era of being with somebody and having a functional relationship starting from 16/17 and lasting until the end of time is over, anyway. Let's be realistic.

It's a mutually abusive relationship, enough said.

[Reudh]

Um, yes.

Abusive relationship on both sides.

Call the cops. Break up. Move on. Grow up.

Done and dusted.

[Iosyn]

Yes, it seems he's abusive and controlling, but it seems you both have trust issues-- and if you can't trust one another it's pretty much doomed from the get-go. Reading through someone's phone is a pretty big indicator. Pretty huge, actually-- and actually doing stuff like that and then questioning the other about such and such is more likely to break up the relationship.

Hell if someone took my phone and suddenly accused me of cheating with the pizza delivery girl I'd be pretty pissed. I'd actually hook up with said pizzagirl just to spite them.

[Zangi]

I'm gonna repeat what I said last time.
Break up and move on before it gets any worse then it is now.  (By Jah, even from the start of the relationship, you never trusted each other...)

In addition, get back in contact with your old friends... someone has to take the first step to rebuild the bridges...

[lordcooper]

Step 1: Quit making almost identical threads
Step 2: GTFO out of this relationship
Step 3: Become better person
Step 4: Find better person
Step 5:
Step 6: Profit