I killed somebody while sneaking by throwing snow at them.
As temperatures above 0 (32 for you Yanks) already fade into distant memory, it will get progressively more difficult for me to recall and draw non-arctic scenes. By February, expect me to forget what colour grass is.
In my latest fortress the first Goblin ambush had them wander across the map towards my entrance, losing half their number to various cage traps along the way, they almost get to the entrance only to meet the dwarf caravan that was also on the way in. A flurry of bolts from the caravan's guards had one of the goblins decide he'd had enough and after spending a good 5 minutes passing out and vomiting he picked himself up and headed for the edge of the map while his companions proceeded on to the entrance and got finished off by the traps there. Out of curiosity I v'd him to see what his injuries were and was rather amused to note, among various others, that he'd been injured in both his groin and butt. Checking the combat report revealed that nothing was shot off though, just muscle bruises.
Little Timmyxüstrab did something bad when he thought his parents weren't looking!
By bolt, plow or hook...
I know this bolt has been fired by four Dwarves already.
First by Urist Likot Lion (twice), second by Urist Uvash Thunen, third by R. Risen and then by Baron Urist Muthkat. It is now in the quiver of Baron Urist Muthkat.
Dwarves sure know how to make things last. The little bolt that could. Kill everything.
Unfortunately, this one started making a story in my mind. One image could not fit it.
I guess if there's someone who deserves a seven-part non-epic, it's you. Congratulations!
okay
the armor is doofy
but just use your IMAGINATION
SO I figured for the fun of it I'd share the death of an elf.
He disassembled a stairwell I had put up to build a roof, and wound up falling down a whole flight of stairs and killed by the log the stairs were made from.
My fortress ended due to greedy mining of candy, but not the way you'd think. I had just uncovered a large vein and I started mining, always carefully estimating where not to dig so I wouldn't uncover something much more festive. Just in case, I had my steel-clad warriors posted near the miners. So, I dug up one z-level and a whole cavern lake started flowing in. The amusing part is that I had previously placed several notes on the previous z-level, warning about the cavern lake. My soldiers somehow got themselves trapped in a corner and drowned, the only one who survived was the very miner that caused the flood. The water then filled my candy mines and workshops.
GO ARMLESS JETPACK DEMON
FLY
WITH THE JETPACK
I SWEAR DEMONS THESE DAYS
Well, Fraps is being stupid and refusing to screenshot, but basically I had a Were-mammoth show up, accompanied by some random human. The two fought each other, and the human managed to bite its eyelid off before the Were-mammoth picked him up by his chicken leather skirt and crushed his skull with his teeth. Once the human was dead, the Were-mammoth shifted back to human form and ran away.
The Recruit punches the Recruit in the tongue with his right hand, lightly tapping the target!
"I knew it I should've brought pig tails instead ;_;"
TN: kawaii means cute
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's head with his (+ Steel War Hammer +), smashing the spine and damaging the nervous tissue!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's left lower leg with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's left foot with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's left upper leg with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's right foot with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's right lower leg with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's right upper leg with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the bone!
#################################################################################################
Pretty much sat there torturing the ogre, left to go get a drink, then came back and began to work the upper body
#################################################################################################
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's lower body with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) bruising the guts!
The militia commander bashes the Ogre's upper body with his (+ Steel War Hammer +) smashing the kidney!
Urist McBuzzkill stabs the Ogre's head with his (+ Bizmuth Bronze short sword +), smashing the bone and tearing the brain!
#####
This happened about 30m ago, but no screenies D:
She walk to the soap stockpile, to pick up soap, then takes 3 steps towards the well. Only to find out, she did not pick up soap at the stockpile, because both her hands are broken and in casts
i'm gay!
Well, I'm very proud of you, coming out so easily.
dat sope
So, silver is the very best thing for blunt weapons, eh?
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the right lower leg with her ({silver maul}), bruising the muscle through the ({troll fur trousers})!
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the left lower arm with her ({silver maul}), bruising the fat through the ({reindeer leather cloak})!
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the lower body with her ({silver maul}), but the attack glances away!
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the left lower arm with her ({silver maul}), bruising the muscle through the ({reindeer leather cloak})!
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the left hand with her ({silver maul}), bruising the fat through the ({cave spider silk left glove})!
The Human Hammerman bashes The Goblin Crossbowman in the head with her ({silver maul}), bruising the skin through the ({giant cave spider silk hood})!
The Human Hammerman punches The Goblin Crossbowman in the left lower leg with her left hand and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Makes you wonder why she's carrying that hammer around.
The third arm I've ever drawn. (To get your arm drawn with definition, you must be able to lift over 200 Urists with it)
I've found that mauls kinda suck. I'm playing lofr, and even the superheavy mauls don't smash in skulls half the time. Contact area seems to be everything for blunt weapons. Could you do a rendition of this? It makes me laugh more than it should, if only because of how long I spent setting everything up.
Part two: Destroyed by a single snowflake.
Chapter 1: That was fast.
A reclamation party had been formed. They had read the records of the previous occupants of Blazemetal, and were not impressed. Those idiots brought almost no food or drink, and no helmet for their military dwarf either. Plus, they only had one military dwarf in their party, travelling to a clearly haunted area! And finally, they brought a lustrum boulder.
The dwarves of the warm torch would be better than this. Among them was MrsWillsauce's husband, apparently eager to destroy the monsters in any way possible to "avenge" his wife. It was pointed out that his wife had apparently died of snowflakes, but he denied this and attributed her death to the cursed creatures. Nobody blamed him.
Dwarves:
MrWillsauce Shellautumns, Deathsmith, m
îmbat Sparkconjures, Plantsmith, f
Cilob Fissuregold, Machinesmith, m
Unib Shakenvessels, Lifesmith, f
Shem Toolglazes, Siegesmith, f
Sigun Peakclinch, Stonesmith, m
Thestkig Burnedsnarled, f
They had prepared for months! Trained, planned, studied… They could not fail. They were The Burning Torch!
Fuck.
Round three, anyone?
I don't get what happened, evil weather? Did it affect anyone?? Was it just too cold??? Are these question marks following a linear pattern??
?? It is a mystery.
ALSO I'M 10 PAGES LATE
Oh No, Not 10 More Pages of Badness
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Topic: I badly draw your reports! (Read 333795 times)