The Rampage of the Berserk Farmer Zon Asteluzol in Arelimud Limar in 95The strange moods inflicted upon the dwarves of the Waterfalls of Wealth had, thus far, all been successful, if not particularly productive: a wooden crossbow, a really pretty mitten, and a throne of salt covered entirely in spikes now being fast-tracked to the Esteemed Nobledwarves' Quarters Beautification Project. This would all change one fateful spring when a hitherto unheard-of mushroom picker, Zon, decided to request silk cloth for a mysterious undertaking - in a jungle outpost far from any suitable web-spinning spiders (giant mosquitoes were, however, in bountiful supply).
Needless to say, this did not end well.
Just outside the main dining hall, one of the Waterfalls' most esteemed engravers and a new mother, Obok Letterpack, ran into the mad farmer while carrying her baby up to river levels to go fishing. In a blind, silk-deprived rage, the lunatic threw punch after punch at the infant - but even as her mother flees, she strikes back with all the fury only dwarven young can possess. An pair of off-duty marksdwarves the next room over, rushing in: Dastot, who forgot his quiver, bashes the farmer with his expertly-crafted crossbow, while Reg, a friend of Obok's, throws a vicious punch of her own before stamping on the Zon's toe. All the while, baby Dumat struggles against her captor's grip.
Enraged only further as new attackers arrive, the spawn-sower shatters Dumat's knee, only for Reg to charge in from behind, tackling him to the ground. Stunned by the fall, Zon is helpless to respond as Dastot wails on him with his not-particularly-deadly crossbow strikes across the arms. Reg, not sure how to proceed, scratches at the attacker's toe so hard that toenail and toejam alike are torn asunder. Beneath their blows, however, the farmer begins to stir for one final assault...
...before Dastot nearly slams him in the gut, the distraction allowing the infant champion Dumat to valiantly punch him in the chest. Releasing his grip in agony, the marksdwarf pounds his foot before Dumat, with superdwarvenly strength, punches through the madman's skull.
Though broken and battered, the child lives.
Dumat Girdermists can only be a gift from Armok.
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