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Author Topic: Roll to be a Turnip  (Read 16214 times)

ansontan2000

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #150 on: August 07, 2012, 09:13:24 am »

Cause the man who bought me's lover fall hopelessly in love with him, and then ascend to become a new love god.

Canceled, see below.
« Last Edit: August 07, 2012, 10:36:09 am by ansontan2000 »
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When a soldier makes a mistake, one man dies.
When a captain makes a mistake, a dozen men die.
When a commander makes a mistake, a thousand men die.
When an emperor makes a mistake, well, there is a game save for retry.

Dirg

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #151 on: August 07, 2012, 09:29:49 am »

Hungry...Absorb more nutrients, use nuclear waste as hot tub.
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MrWillsauce

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #152 on: August 07, 2012, 10:01:40 am »

Begin tantruming. Destroy house and kill offspring, then eat the ice cream to calm me down.
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Sinpwn

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #153 on: August 07, 2012, 10:04:40 am »

Make modular spider-robots. Thousands of them.
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sayaks

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #154 on: August 07, 2012, 10:26:08 am »

Use my super powers to create super-supper for all non-superior beings, then superiorly help everyone.
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10ebbor10

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #155 on: August 07, 2012, 10:31:20 am »

Sabotage everyone's actions
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ansontan2000

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #156 on: August 07, 2012, 10:36:37 am »

Prevent ebbor's sabotage.
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When a soldier makes a mistake, one man dies.
When a captain makes a mistake, a dozen men die.
When a commander makes a mistake, a thousand men die.
When an emperor makes a mistake, well, there is a game save for retry.

LordSlowpoke

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #157 on: August 07, 2012, 10:39:16 am »

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ansontan2000

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #158 on: August 07, 2012, 10:40:46 am »

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When a soldier makes a mistake, one man dies.
When a captain makes a mistake, a dozen men die.
When a commander makes a mistake, a thousand men die.
When an emperor makes a mistake, well, there is a game save for retry.

zomara0292

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #159 on: August 07, 2012, 10:46:54 am »

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I hear a piranha is good eating.  I have a spear; I'll be fine!
The Pilot and their cargo handlers paused when they saw that the entire camp is covered in eldritch runes coated in blood. And rotting monkey corpses everywhere..

They decide that they didn't get paid enough for this..

lordcooper

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #160 on: August 07, 2012, 11:12:31 am »

EXPLODE
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Santorum leaves a bad taste in my mouth

Unholy_Pariah

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #161 on: August 07, 2012, 11:21:11 am »

Become more parasitic!!!!
Start converting Dirg's nutrients into my nutrients.
Infect Dirg's date with my spoors.
(2) you cannot become more parasitic then being a parasite, (2) you fail to infect Dirg's date with your spores.
(6) you become a super parasite and take over complete control of Dirgs body, (6) you alter dirgs reproductive system to produce you genetic material and infect his date with your parasitic progeny.

Hungry...Absorb more nutrients, use nuclear waste as hot tub.
(3) you begin absorbing nutrients, you fail to find a hot tub or any radioactive waste to fill it with.
(6+6) you absorb 12 nutrients due to rolling double sixes, you install a hot tub inside a nuclear power station and cause a meltdown becoming a giant all powerful radioactive Mecha-Turnip and wage war on the universe spreading Zomara's progeny everywhere you travel.

Begin tantruming. Destroy house and kill offspring, then eat the ice cream to calm me down.
you begin throwing a tantrum, (5) you destroy your house and kill your young, (2) you destroyed the ice cream whilst killing your young.
(6) you throw a tantrum so powerful you not only destroy your house and murder your offspring but you tear down the very walls of your existence causing all reality's to exist simultaneously in the same space, (6) you devour (6) ice cream reality's.

Make modular spider-robots. Thousands of them.
(5) you design and construct thousands of modular spider-bots.
(6) you Produce tens of millions of tiny modular spider bots and prepare to unleash your wrath upon the Omniverse.

Use my super powers to create super-supper for all non-superior beings, then superiorly help everyone.
(3) you begin focusing your superpowers.
(6) you create the ultimate super-supper for all non superior beings, (6) you then superiorly help everyone by saving the inhabitants of the ice cream realty's by creating replacement ice cream realities for them to make more ice cream in.

Sabotage everyone's actions
(4+1) you sabotage everyones actions, you are part of everyone you therefore sabotage yourself causing yourself to roll a (1) and not only fail to sabotage everyone but also granting everyone a roll of (6) you sabotage everyone but yourself granting them a roll of (1) except for the fact that ansontan just sabotaged this sabotage boosting everyone's rolls to (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means everyone's rolls are now back at (1) meaning they are back at (6) which means its time to follow Lordcoopers example.

Prevent ebbor's sabotage.
(1) you fail to prevent ebbors sabotage and unwittingly help him achieve his goals.
(6) you sabotage his sabotage so hard that you cause his sabotage to backfire boosting everyone's rolls to six including this one... wait what?

Sabotage everyone's actions

Prevent ebbor's sabotage.

SABOTAGE SABOTEURS
(2) you fail to sabotage the sabotuers.
(6)you sabotage everyone except or yourself causing ebbor's sabotage to fail as well as ansontans prevention of his sabotage causing a paradox that sabotages your sabotage of their sabotages...

EXPLODE
(2) no
(6) you cant handle the paradoxical infinte looping and decide to end it all in a spectacularly violent fashion by becoming a sub-critical mass and detonating yourself, the omniverse paradox decides to follow your example to spare itself the perpetual torture of trying to figure out what the hell its meant to be doing.


CONGRATULATIONS YOU HAVE DESTROYED THE OMNIVERSE! I HOPE YOUR FREAKING HAPPY!

Characters:
LordYoinkPoke:DEAD
Yoink: DEAD
LordSlowPoke: DEAD
MrWillsauce:DEAD
Sinpwn: DEAD
ansontan2000: DEAD
Dirg: DEAD
Lordcooper: DEAD
Killerhellhound: DEAD
Corai:DEAD
Spinal_Taper:DEAD
10ebbor10: MEGA-DEAD, WOULD BE IN HELL BUT DESTROYED THAT TOO.
Zomara:DEAD
Person: DEAD
Sayaks: DEAD
Digital Hellhound: DEAD
Logged
Clearly running multiple missions at the same time is a terrible idea.  The epic battle to see which team can cock it up worse has escalated again.

And Larry kinda gets blueballed in all this; just left with a raging bone spear and no where to put it.

ansontan2000

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #162 on: August 07, 2012, 11:23:33 am »

Uh.....Oops?
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When a soldier makes a mistake, one man dies.
When a captain makes a mistake, a dozen men die.
When a commander makes a mistake, a thousand men die.
When an emperor makes a mistake, well, there is a game save for retry.

LordSlowpoke

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #163 on: August 07, 2012, 11:23:55 am »

Worth it.
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lordcooper

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Re: Roll to be a Turnip
« Reply #164 on: August 07, 2012, 11:30:44 am »

Sorry bout that.
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Santorum leaves a bad taste in my mouth
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