ARGH. TRY AGAIN. GET THE GUN NO MATTER WHAT. Also, I would like to apply for the Lieutenant position of the Paladins.
(6vs2+2) YOU AND YOUR FREAKS LAY SIEGE TO GWGS COMPOUND, TAKING HIS EXPERIMENTAL GUN AND FLEEING THE AREA!
Secretly finish project GODSLAYER, a sniper rifle that could kill even Morgan Freeman.
(2) YOU MAKE A PROP OF A REALLY BIG SNIPER RIFLE.
"I see. It appears that many creations have formed their own factions, thus having much better success rates. It's time to even the playing field."
>FORM VOID FACTION
>CONTINUE TO POWER UP THE VOID VORTEX WITH THE CELESTIAL POWER PLANTS OF THE GALAXY INSIDE SAID VORTEX
(1) YOU TRY AND BECOME A LEADER, BUT A LASER BOLT FLIES THROUGH YOUR HEAD.
DESTROY VOID VORTEX WITH GODLY POWERS.
(2) YOU THROW MOVIE MONSTERS AT THE VORTEX!
BOSSES:
"Why? I'm merely creating a haven for those who want to get away from the chaos of the rest of the universe. A place where one can live in peace, and not worry about being swept up in some horrible war. If anything, it will lead to a slight reduction in chaos."
Promise citizenry immortality in exchange for being converted.
(2+2) YOUR CITIZENS, ONCE PROMISED ETERNAL LIFE, ARE MUCH MORE WILLING TO BE CONVERTED.
"Why? I'm merely creating a haven for those who want to get away from the chaos of the rest of the universe. A place where one can live in peace, and not worry about being swept up in some horrible war. If anything, it will lead to a slight reduction in chaos."
Promise citizenry immortality in exchange for being converted.
I beg to differ.
"She is always doing that. How rude."
*sigh*
>Calmly get up, brush self off, walk up to Dirg and knee him in the gnads, and infusing the pain of every kneed person since the invention of television. Scratch that, instead stare at his foot benignly, which is signal for ninja bodyguards to attack him.
> Regardless of their sucess, attempt to drain Dirg of his masculinity while he is occupied.
> Raid Aperture Science, confiscate WMDs, and destroy any research relating to them.
> Finish walk to other side of planet, accompanied by military escort. Survey the corrupted half.
Oh yeah, Greenstar is now my new lieunenient.
(6+1vs1+2) YOUR ASSASSINS BEAT UP DIRG AND LOOK FOR THE SIGNAL TO CONTINUE. LICHETTE LOOKS AT YOU. SHE LOOKS AT YOU IN A NOT HAPPY WAY.
Make some more Sol Slayers, what I'm naming my new WMD.
Research principles behind my new weapon, to determine effects of larger and smaller versions.
Cede control of consultants to locals, with orders to not use them offensively.
(4+2, 1+2, 3+2) YOU CONTINUE MANUFACTURING YOUR WEAPONS, AND END UP WITH 10 OF THEM. YOU LEARN THAT WHILE THEY GROW IN POWER WITH SIZE, IT'S NOT PROPORTIONAL, BUT THE AMOUNT IT INCREASES REDUCES.
"Stand down Misko! I was just getting you back a bit for all the things you said and did to Lichette, you attack me, or attack those planets and their inhabitants, then what happens next is just self defense.." WATCH MISKO'S MOVEMENTS FOR HOSTILITY AND REACT ACCORDINGLY. IF HE USES HIS ARMS TO ATTACK, GRAB HIM BY THE ARM AND PULL HIM TOWARDS ME WHILE DELIVERING AN ELBOW TO THE FACE. IF HE USES HIS LEGS TO ATTACK, GRAB HIM BY THE LEG, LIFT IT HIGHER THEN DRIVE MY KNEE INTO HIS GROIN. REGARDLESS, MAKE A SPECIES OF FURBIES.
YOU HAD PLANS FOR IF HE PUNCHED. YOU HAD PLANS FOR IF HE KICKED. HOWEVER... YOU HAD
NO PLAN FOR MOTHER FUCKING NINJAS! (4+2) YOU MAKE A RACE OF FURBIES, FOR SOME INCOMPREHENSIBLE REASON.
None of you ... none of you did shit. Neither participant did JACK FUCKING SHIT!!!
Xantalos grows to mostrous proportions.
So, neither of you wussies wanted to rassle like REAL MEN? Have it your way.
Xantalos destroys WrestleMania 2012, taking out the galaxy it happens to be hosted in.
Now I'm pretty sure my momma wouldn't approve of me doing this, but I apologize, momma, I have to.
These Slim Jims need some snapping.
As the incarnation of wrestling, Macho Man Randy Savage, Macho Man snaps the slim jims that like to call themselves Misko and Tim right in half. He then turns into Chuck Norris and roundhouse kicks them out of time and space.
(6vs1) HOLY SHIT XANTALOS SHOWS UP AND STARTS WRECKING SHIT WITH A FOLDABLE LAWN CHAIR. FIRST TARGET, MISKOS FACE! IT BECOMES A BLOODY SMEAR ON A METAL CHAIR. (2vs4) THEN YOU GO AFTER TIM. SADLY, HE DOESN'T GO DOWN SO EASILY, DODGING THE CHAIR AND GIVING YOU A FIRM KNEE TO THE ABDOMEN.
Lichette:
Lichette was about to apply liberal amounts of asskicking to Misko, but her bloodlust was sated by Xantalos breaking his face on a chair.
"Didn't think I'd say this, but thanks Xantalos."
(5+3vs3+2) Then, she goes after the assasins. They become what could best be analogized with a ketchup truck crashing.
Tim:
"The fuck? I tho-I thought I killed you! And what the hell's with the get up?"
(5v6) Tim comes in for an uppercut, but Xantalos handily dodges the attack, dodging to Tims side.
SWAGGOTS:
Learn to swag and then be the boss Of swag. (co-alligned with the romantics)
Romantics:
Leader: Lichette +3
Lieutenant: Dirg +2,
Legions:
Cross the male lich with Taveros (I want his horns too) and you have me. The lich's subconscious (unofficially).
Also I will Liberaly kick you ass.
Question, can I have my sword? The one I crafted, and the golem took?
And I'm Liberal.
I THINK SPINAL_TAPER IS GONNA TAKE A FEW WEEKS TO ROLL ALL THE ACTIONS.
Keep talking Miskos, for it shall make it all the easier to reach down your throat and yank out the sad remains of your heart.
SHE SLITHERS INTO PLACE, AND JOINS THE ROMANTICS, SALUTING LICHETTE WITH HER TITANIUM SCYTHE!
Paladins:
Leader: Misko +2
Lieutenant: Greenstar +1
Legions:
So, we all agree that both slashfic and misko need to die?
Agreed. The collective rescinds it previous alliance with the Doctor due to his descent into madness. We also propose the formation of a temporary alliance to combat this menace.
We shall call it Those Who Oppose Crazy Shit, or TWOCS for short.
This one shall join this alliance if only to speed up annihilation. Slashfics are the spawn of creation and they inspire more creation. They must be annihilated.
Lichette means to create an everlasting world of beauty and creation. Join us. (Conservative/Eldritch) We oppose lichette and therefore the very act of creation itself. With you at our side, none can stand against us!
Eldritch creature makes good point. Rescinding TWOCS alliance, this one joins Conservative. On the condition that the democrats are handed over to this one.
Oh fine....
MY FINAL FORM SHALL BE.....DWARF FORTRESS 1.0 (!!!!!!)
Oh and on the Conservative side, because its the dickish thing to do at this point.
STOP SUPPORTING THE LICHETTE, SHE IS EVIL.
Final Form: Demonic Werewolf.
There is no good. There is no evil, there is only the strong, and the weak. There is only power, and those too weak to sieze it. There is no love, there is only anger. There is no joy, there is only sorrow. There is no hope, there is only hate. All the talk of order, peace, and beauty is merely madmen scrabbling desprately to avoid the truth: That we are the cruel ones, the destroyers of life. We meddle in things we don't understand, for the sake of those not yet born, and for what? Nothing but petty squabbles over dogma. The Madness must end!
His endless chatter grates upon my nerves. I have grown tired of this game.
Annihilate Misko. If successful, join Xantalos. If fails, stay on the Liberal team.
Form: I am all. I am that which lies beyond the horizon; that which collapses the ground underneath you, the ones who wait beyond the veil. I lie in the recesses of sentience's souls; I am the voice in the back of your mind urging you to steal, to hurt, to kill. I rot trees and crumble mountains. I consume stars with my passing; I warp existence by existing. I am the threads that bind your shells together, the one that watches and waits for the time of destruction to arrive. And now it has. I sally forth, and my very presence is anathema to your being. I have seen universes come and go, and this one will not last. Whatever you do, whoever you pray to, if I am not them, they will submit or cease to exist. I am your doom. I am all. I. Am. Xantalos.
Faction: I serve none; I come to destroy the love inherent in the corpse-bitch, and then her - no more. Ally with me as you see fit - it will not change the result.
TWOCSTHE DRUNKEN FOOLS
YOINK, THE DESTINED/DRUNKEN ONE +2
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS GOING ON
BUT I AM NOT IN ANY OF THE 100+ LISTS OF PLAYERS/FACTIONS
CO-PILOT SIDECAR.
BY DOING SO, JOIN DRUNKEN FOOLS TEAM.
CO-CO-PILOT SIDECAR. ALSO JOIN DRUNKEN FOOLS I GUESS.
(i still have no idea whats going on, i cant be arsed to read 3 pages filled with ranting.)
THE MODERATES:Leader: GreatWyrm +2
I am: A giant dragon-robot with lots of neat weapons and powerful magic. Also the pope of the reformed Miskopalian church.
I am a Moderate.
I will convince the lichette and Dirg to get married in the Miskopalian church I set up at Aperture Science.
Corai:
Join moderates.
"The sheer amount of insanity is insane."
Begin research on dark tombs that teach one how to forcefully change another person's form into a lich.
MANLY MEN:
XANTALOS: LEADER: +1
Lord Slowpoke
ISOLATIONISTS:
WESTSEEIIDE!!: