WRAP AROUND DIRG
POSSESS HIM AND RIP THE LICH TO PIECES
(3) YOU WRAP AROUND DIRG, BUT THE LICH SPREADS HER IMMUNITY TO HIM, EVEN THOUGH SHE DOESN'T LIKE HIM OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT.
GRAAAAAAAAARG.
BE RAMBO AGAIN.
CHAAAAAAAAAAAAARGE.
(3) YOU WALK TOWARDS THE GOLEM AT A SLOW PACE, WHILE TAKING THE FORM OF AN AGED SLYVESTER STALLONE
>KEEP TRYING
(2) SHE'S GETTING WIERDED OUT NOW.
USE NAPALM BURNING SELF+FLAG AND JUMP ON RAPTOR SCREAMING GIVE UP ALREADY, IT WAS A STUPID PLAN, JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER PLAN IN THIS. SERIOUSLY OUR PLANS SUCK. JUST LOOK AT ME, IM ON FUCKING FIRE FROM NAPALM AND I DECIDED TO JUMP ONTO ANOTHER DUDE WHOS ACTUALLY DOING SOMETHING SEMI PRODUCTIVE, AS OPPOSED TO THROWING MYSELF AT THE LICH OR SOMETHING. ALSO IM MAKING THIS INCREDIBLY, HORRIBLY LONG POST THAT THE GM WILL PROBABLY HAVE TO SPOILER OR SIMPLY HEADDESK REPEATEDLY. I REALLY AM A DICK
I AM HOWEVER QUITE AN ELOQUENT DICK CONSIDERING THE WHOLE, ON FIRE THING. I MEAN REALLY WHO MANAGES TO CREATE A WELL THOUGHT OUT....I DONT KNOW FUCKING ESSAY OR SOMETHING WHILE ON FIRE? THIS GUY.
AND NOW I JUST IMAGINED HOW INSANE IT WOULD BE IF THIS SOMEHOW RESULTED IN US WINNING. THAT WOULD BE FUNNY BECAUSE SERIOUSLY, LEAST PRODUCTIVE USE OF MY BODY BEING MELTED INTO A PUDDLE TIME EVER. EVER
(4) YOU ATTACK RAPTOR, WHILE HE ACTS RATHER STALKERY TOWARDS THE LICK.
>Access magical powers
>Locate the part of GLaDOS that makes her evil/insane
>Destroy it
(1) IT MUST BE THAT CAROLINE THING. LET'S GET RID OF THA-OOPS.
"AIGHT, FUCK THIS."
GIVE UP FIGHTING THE LICH, A FRUITLESS EFFORT.
GO TAKE GANGSTERS AND LIVE IN THE SOME OTHER DIMENSION WHERE PEOPLE AREN'T STUPID ALL THE TIME.
(3) YOU ENTER THE SAINTS ROW HOME WORLD. THE FIRST THING THAT HAPPENS IS YOU STARING DOWN A DILDO-WIELDING GIMP.
JUST FUGGIN TAKE CONTROL OVER THE BIG GOLEM INCINERATOR THINGY.
(is my pokemon golem still alive? If so, then do this:)
OH YEAH, AND HAVE POKEMON GOLEM THINGY PUNCH LICH. REALLY HARD.
(You never had one. You didn't have any pokemon with you, so you couldn't catch it.)
YOU WRESTLE CONTROL OF THE GOLEM FROM THE LICHETTE, CAUSING HER TO RECOIL BACKWARDS, INTO DIRGS CONFETTIED CORPSE.
Told ya I wasn't gonna roll a 1 ye doubters =P MUST CONTINUE DISTRACTING LICH. IN CONFETTI STATE, BEGIN PLANNING FIRST DATE.
(2) "NO! I DON'T LOVE YOU, OKAY! I ONLY SAVED YOU BECAUSE I FELT LIKE IT! GO AWAY!"
That, was, weird. Uh, WAIT KNOW!
>SUMMON XENU, FLANKED BY SPACE SHIPS
>SUMMON HIS OPPOSITE, FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER DIRECTLY OPPOSITE LICHETTE AND XENU, FLANKED BY CHRISTIAN FUNDAMENTALISTS RIDING RAPTORS
>HAVE THEM RUSH AT EACH OTHER, STRIKING THE LICHETTE AND EACH OTHER SIMULTANEUSLY, AND EXPLODE IN MASSIVE BURST OF ANTIMATTER
ITS GOING TO WORK. I BET YOU CAN'T THINK OF A WAY IT WON'T WORK.
(1) I JUST DID. XENU JUST KILLS YOU FIRST.
MAKE ROCKET LAUNCHER
FIRE TEAMWORKORB
ALSO MAKE TEAMWORK ORB
(3) YOU MAKE A CATAPULT, (3) FIRE A HYPOTHETICAL ORB AT THE LICHETTE, BEFORE YOU THEN (4) CREATE SAID ORB, AND PLACE IT WHERE IT WOULD BE. IT FLIES TOWARDS DIRG, BUT THE LICHETTE LEAPS IN FRONT OF HIM TO TAKE THE BLOW.
I WAS HOPING EVERYONE FORGOT ABOUT THE CUTEBOLD CRAP I DID. ... ASK TCM WHAT DO.
(2) INTERDIMENSIONAL CHAT IS CURRENTLY OFFLINE.
BOSS TURN:
(3) SHE IGNORES DIRG, BUT THEN (6+2-1) TAKES BACK CONTROL OF THE GOLEM, AND HOPS ATOP IT! THE BLADE GLOWS MENACINGLY.
BOSS STATUS
Hot Undead Wizard
Spheres Discovered:
Flame-Misko
Frost-Misko
Gun-TCM
Slademantine-Golem
Chocolate-Great Golem
Meta-Miuaw62
Heart-Lich
Blood-Great Golem
Chaos-Dirg
Sound-Misko
Dragon-Great Golem
Mud-Great Golem
Light-Great Golem
Imagination-Great Golem
Law-Lich
MINIONS
ZOMARA
1 PINEAPPLE GOLEM
The Wizard
GREAT GOLEM
NEUTRAL
WOLFCHILD DEMON OF WAR
CAERWYN HARBINGER OF PLAGUE
TIRUIN FAMINE BRNGER
RTD FAMINE BRINGER
NIRUR TORIR DARK CONVERSATIONALIST
CORAI, THE MOST RECENT TRAITOR
LUCAS
CHRISTEHCHRIS, FISH WIELDER
RAPTORFANGAMER, THE NEEDY
HEROES
GREENSTARFANATIC LIFE/LOVE INCARNATE AND LOVING HUSBAND
GREATWYRMGOLD, A DRAGON, AND THE POPE OF MISKO
YOINK, THE RETURNER
CORAI, THE SACRIFICE
MISKO, SCREAMING NUTJOB
JETEX, MCCLAY SLAYER
DIRG, THE ULTIMATE PARTY CRASHER
LORDSLOWPOKE, THE NETHACK REFERENCE
TCM, ORB ABOVE THE GOLEM
MIAUW62, THE WORLDS WORST STAGE
HANSLANDA, CTHULU
OBDURA, THE GUY I FORGOT
MISKO, THE GOD OF FLAME AND MUSIC
ARENA STATUS
DICK
BFFL
XANTALOS, HUGE ASSHOLE