Hah! It will never die, at least until the boss does.ATTEMPT TO RELATE WITH DEMON MOTHRA WITH HEARTFELT SPEECH
(2) YOU APPROACH THE DEMON BUTTERFLY, AND ATTEMPT TO BRIDGE THE RACIAL GAP WITH A HEARTFELT SPEECH. "YOU SHOULD JOIN US BECAUSE THE LICH GUY IS BAD, M'KAY?" THEN, YOU PELVIC THRUST AND WINK A LITTLE. MOTHRA IS NOT AMUSED.
I pick up my head and offer to take her back to my place PROPOSE.
(3) AFTER LIFTING HALF OF YOUR HEAD FROM NIRURS EVIL GRASP, YOU APPROACH THE BODY DOUBLE, WHO WAS DOING HIS/HER MAKEUP. DROPPING DOWN TO ONE KNEE, AND PULLING A RING OUT OF NOWHERE, YOU PROPOSE.(5) SHE ACCEPTS GRACIOUSLY.
Order minions to attack, claim soul of any hero falling this turn
YOU ORDER THE MINIONS TO RUSH THE HEROES, AND THEY (5v5)ARE DISTRACTED BY DIRGS RAP BATTLE. THE RAP BATTLE OF THE CENTURY
DISTARCT LICH'S MINIONS AND IMPS WITH FREE STYLE RAP BATTLE...YO?
DISTARCT LICH'S MINIONS AND IMPS WITH FREE STYLE RAP BATTLE...YO?
, RANDOM IMPS VERSUS SOME RANDOM GUY. GO!
BE A POTATO. SUDDENLY, START GLOWING, HOVERING AND GAINING POOOWWWERRR! TURN OUT TO BE GOD OF POTATOES.
(2) YOU DO NOT BECOME A POTATO. I APOLOGIZE.
RISE TO HEAVEN, ASK FOR A NEW BODY TO FIGHT LICH WITH.... AND A B2 BOMBER!
(4) UP IN HEAVEN, THEY GIVE YOU A NEW BODY. IT'S YOUR OLD ONE. IT COULD HAVE BEEN WORSE, I GUESS. (2) HOWEVER, NO BOMBER.
EAT SON, SUMMON INFINTE LEGIONS TO BATTLE.
(2) YOU ATTEMPT TO DEVOUR YOUR SON, BUT HE IS NOT A FAN OF THAT. HE EVADES YOUR BITE. (6) YOU SUMMON YOUR INFINITE LEGIONS TO BATTLE ON YOUR SONS SIDE. OOPS.
Attempt to use shape-shifting magic to turn into an antman. Four arms are better than two!
(3) YOU CAST SHAPE-SHIFTING MAGIC, AND IT DOES NOT END WELL. IF I COULD PUT IT NICELY, YOU HAVE AN ANTS HEAD, AND A HUMAN BODY. MAYBE A WARRIOR WAS NOT THE CHOICE TO CAST MAGIC.
Forge four unique weapons: One, the Spear of Tittianus, renowned for it's stabbiness. The Sword of Archioles, able to be thrown any distance, and will come back to the user. The Bow of Bladurius, which never misses, and can be used as a potent melee weapon; but the user does suffer from some bladder problems. And, finally, the Club of Rage, which can put the wielder into such a state of fury, that none can stop it/him/her. They do tend to attack inanimate objects, however. Distribute these fine weapons to my allies/Master! Oh, and make all the weapons ebil. Because I can.
YOU FORGE 4 WEAPONS, EACH WITH AN INCREDIBLE ENCHANTMENT. (6) THE SPEAR OF TITTIANUS, RENOWNED FOR BEING ABLE TO STAB THROUGH ANYTHING. UNFORTUNATELY, IT ALSO MAKES THE WIELDER INTO A PLAYER, UNABLE TO RESIST WOMENS "SPECIAL CHARMS". (6) THE SWORD OF ARCHIOLES, WHICH CAN BE HURLED ANY DISTANCE, THEN RETURN TO THE THROWER. UNFORTUNATELY, IT LIKES TO RETURN BLADE END FIRST. (4) THE BOW OF BLADURIUS, WHICH NEVER MISSES. IT ALSO HAS THE UNFORTUNATE SIDE EFFECT OF LOOSENING THE USERS BLADDER. (4) THE CLUB OF RAGE, WHICH FILLS THE USER WITH AN UNSTOPPABLE RAGE. AT EVERYTHING. FROM ENEMIES TO MOUNTAINS, IF IT EXISTS, THEY ARE ANGRY AT IT.
DISTARCT LICH'S MINIONS AND IMPS WITH FREE STYLE RAP BATTLE...YO?
(5 v 5) THE IMPS STOP RUSHING YOUR ALLIES TO ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE. THE INFERNAL MIC DROPS FROM THE CEILING, AND THE LEAD IMP TAKES IT.
"HERO, YOU'RE MORE LIKE A ZERO. I'M ABOUT TO RAPE YOU LIKE MY NAME IS NERO!" HE DROPS THE MIC IN FRONT OF YOU.
PUT ON DREAMER MACHINE AND GO TO NEXT LEVEL OF SLEEP.
CREATE ELABORATE SCENARIO WHERE YOU AND LICH BOSS ARE AT A ROADHOUSE-TYPE BAR IN 1991.
CONVINCE BOSS THAT THE BAR IS CLOSING SOON AND HE'S NOT GOING HOME WITH THOSE LADIES SO HE SHOULD CHOOSE A DIFFERENT LINE OF WORK.
HEADING BACK IN TIME, YOU APPROACH THE YOUNG BOSS IN A BAR. (1) NOW, HE IS BUT A NECROMANCER WITH A DREAM. YOU ATTEMPT TO CONVINCE HIM TO GO INTO A DIFFERENT LINE OF WORK, BUT HE SIMPLY IGNORES YOU, AND CONTINUES SPEAKING WITH THE WOMEN.
"WHAT IS THAT, A BUTTERFLY?"
"HA HA HA BUTTERFLIES ARE FOR GIRLS"
"ALSO YOU MISSED. I COULD SMELL THAT FAIL A MILE AWAY"
MAKE FUN OF BOSS
THEN SHANK WITH EYECHUCKS WHEN DISTRACTED
(5) YOU MAKE FUN OF THE BOSS, AND HE BEGINS CRYING. THEN YOU MOVE TO SHANK HIM. IT DOES NOT WORK WELL. (2) DESPITE HIS CRUSHING SADNESS, HE MANAGES TO DODGE YOUR ATTACK
"OH NO YOU DIDN'T"
FOLD NAPKIN SWORD
CUT ABDOMEN UP MORE
(1) YOUR HANDS BECOME A BLUR AS YOUR BEGIN FOLDING A NAPKIN SWORD. HOWEVER, YOU FORGOT THAT TOUCHING SHARP THINGS HURT. YOU NOW HAVE NO FINGERS. (4) HOWEVER, THAT DOES NOT STOP YOU FROM RUSHING THE BOSS ANYWAY, CUTTING HIS ABDOMEN UP WITH YOUR UNKEMPT TOENAILS.
Douse severed head with unholy water.
YOU DOUSE HALF OF THE HEAD WITH UNHOLY WATER. (6) IT CONSUMES THE HALF HEAD WITH DEMONIC ENERGY, TURNING IT INTO A RABID HALF HEAD WHICH THEN (4) BITES YOU IN THE LEG CAUSING SOME BLEEDING,
ACQUIRE PHOENIX DOWNS
ACQUIRE MINIGUN
COMBINE PHOENIX DOWN AND MINIGUN
AIM AT NEAREST UNDEAD, FIRE AT WILL
(1) NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU SEARCH, A PHEONIX DOWN EVADES YOU. YOU TRY TO MAKE YOUR OWN, BUT LIGHTING A DUCK ON FIRE TURNS OUT TO BE RATHER UNWISE. (5) A MINIGUN, HOWEVER, IS MUCH EASIER TO FIND. (2) SEEING HOW YOU HAVE NO PHEONIX DOWN, IT'S HARD TO COMBINE ONE WITH YOUR MINIGUN. (5v4) DESPITE YOUR LACK OF A HOLY MAGIC INFUSED MINIGUN, YOU SPIN IT UP AND FIRE UPON TIRUIN MID-SMITE. IT DOSEN'T DO MUCH, BUT NEITHER DOES HIS MAGIC.
ACQUIRE PHOENIX DOWNS
ACQUIRE MINIGUN
COMBINE PHOENIX DOWN AND MINIGUN
AIM AT NEAREST UNDEAD, FIRE AT WILL
SMITE THIS FOO' FOR DOING TOO MANY ACTIONS!
(4v5) YOU ARE SHOT AT MID SMITE. WHAT CAN BE DESCRIBED AS A SLIGHT TINGLING SENSATION HAPPENS TO BOTH OF YOU. MORE SEVERE WITH YOU THOUGH, IT KIND OF TICKLES.
APPEAR OUT OF NOWHERE
SHOVE EVERYTHING INSIDE GRILL (by everything I mean everything)
GRILL EVERYTHING
EAT RESULTING STEAK
(3) YOU APPEAR OUT OF A RANDOM DOOR. (6) THEN YOU SUMMON A MASSIVE GRILL, PLACING EVERYTHING INSIDE OF IT, INCLUDING THE GRILL. THIS CREATES A PARADOX, SO THE GM RESETS THE CAMPAIGN TO JUST BEFORE YOU ARRIVED. (3) YOU APPEAR OUT OF A RANDOM DOOR. WAIT. THE GM JUST KILLS YOU NOW.
Use the dagger to infect the land. Oh yeah, and claim more souls too.
YOU STAB THE FLOOR WITH A DAGGER. (5) USUALLY, THIS WOULDN'T DO MUCH, BUT THE DICE DECIDED TO PLAY NICE, SO THE HALL BEGINS TO FILL WITH MIST, AND THE CHAIRS AND TABLES FADE INTO GRAVESTONES. PRETTY CLICHE.
BOSS TURN:
The lich watched as one of his body doubles was proposed to. Needless to say, he was slightly creeped out. Wait, was he even a he anymore? He was a being of sheer ectoplasm and evil. He quickly dismissed the confusing concept and went to aide his minions, mostly by trying to nab the soul of Xantalos before his minions RTD and wolfchild. (2v2v2) They all fail miserably. Xantalos laughs a little before flitting off to the endless bureaucracy of the afterlife, so the joke may have been on him.
BOSS STATUS
ECTOPLASM REBIRTH
DEATH INCARNATE
MINIONS
WOLFCHILD DEMON OF WAR
-Hundreds on Imps
CAERWYN HARBINGER OF PLAGUE
TIRUIN FAMINE BRNGER
RTD FAMINE BRINGER
NIRUR TORIR DARK CONVERSATIONALIST
EVIL CENTIPEDE, REAL INTIMIDATING
ARENA STATUS
DINING HALL, NOW A PORTAL TO HELL
Poll
45 (56.3%)
Author
Topic: HERO CIVIL WAR (YOU AT FINAL BOSS PART 2): Dat Countdown: (.5) (Read 658021 times)