And a lossless compression algorithm that will compress any file.
Come on, that one's actually impossible.
Well with quantum computing you could technically make a lossless compression algorithm that would take any file of N bits and turn it into a file of substantially less qubits, since qubits operate on a ternary (3-base) numerical system, with the options being 0, 1, or both simultaneously. The compression would only be able to work once per file, and at that point you would need a fully operational quantum storage/operational system, the likes of which the world has yet to produce.
That's not
compression though, that's merely
conversion from one system to another. You could make a system where each "bit" has 256 possible states, making each bit equivalent to a binary byte, but again, that isn't compression, that's merely conversion from binary to another system.
A system that can truly losslessly compress
any file is impossible, because that would have to be able to further compress its own output through any number of iterations, which obviously runs into problems as you approach zero file size.
Similarly, you can't have multiple processors accurately run a single processor program on multiple processors
faster than it would run on a single processor (without some sort of advanced AI that "understands" how the code works and can essentially rewrite it for multiple processors, no such AI exists yet), because you'd have to run a single-threaded copy of it to determine what parts could be run in separate threads. That single copy would be both your limiting factor on how fast you could get it to run on multiple processors
and the speed you'd get if you ran it on a single processor. In other words, there'd be no point in doing that, since it could only run
slower on multiple processors that way. (I suppose you could do a less exact simulation based on profiling, but that would likely produce odd, unpredictable, and unstable behavior of the program when the simulation "guesses wrong" in some situations, which would likely happen frequently in uncommon/complex situations.)
I'm not sure why Heph said what I wrote wasn't true, since everything else he wrote just agreed with exactly what I was saying.