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[Il Palazzo]

Classy.  Right up there with finding dates at funerals.

It ain't easy. The competition is stiff.

[scriver]

Honestly, if you think a waitress is into you, leaving your number on the receipt is probably the classiest choice of action. It doesn't put the waitress on the spot when she has to be professionally nice to you and it leaves the ball entirely in her court -- she can choose whether to call or discard as she pleases.

[TD1]

So, this has been a topic of some thought and discussion in my friend circle as of late, and unfortunately there isn't any one good general answer to it.

If you're not actively flirting with someone (and even that is an altogether too-broad term that encompasses an extreme range of various actions), there's not really much you can do to avoid giving that impression. If someone is interested in you, they will generally be perfectly capable of interpreting anything and everything you do as a potential sign of interest. Especially if they don't know you particularly well.

Approaching the subject after you've identified it is also, well, somewhat awkward... If taking the direct route and just telling the person that you've noticed certain trends and that you're not interested in that way, it's absolutely not uncommon for them to deny everything and say that you've got it all wrong.

And no, trying to put the brakes on something by turning on the "freeze factor" and attempting to give signs of disinterest really doesn't work. Not only does it mean being unnaturally distant from someone you otherwise get along with, but a number of people are extremely attracted to that kind of aloof and cold behavior.


There are optimal scenarios where this situation can be neutralized with minimal hurt and disappointment, but those scenarios cannot be guaranteed. You really just have to respect her feelings as a person and tell her, presuming that there's absolutely no chance that you'd be willing to explore things with her.

A good answer, thank you.
Honestly, she's good looking and I like talking to her. We're just very different people. For instance, I don't drink - she was regaling me with tales of how she vomited the night before because of how much she drank.

I comport myself well in social situations, I think - talkative, friendly, so on. But that's all surface layer and took time and effort on my part to do naturally. When it comes to deeper stuff - to use a metaphor, popping the hood - I'm out of my depth. I need a script, dammit!

[Yoink]

Sounds like she could help you turn over a new leaf!

[TD1]

Hah, nice try Yoink 

[Yoink]

I'm not sure if it's just the batteries in my hearing aid dying, but I think I hear wedding bells...

[Naturegirl1999]

I'm not sure if it's just the batteries in my hearing aid dying, but I think I hear wedding bells...

Do you hear them from a location or does it sound like they are inside you?

[Ulfarr]

You thought it was a girl from work but no! It was Yoink!

[Kagus]

You thought it was a girl from work but no! It was Yoink!

Th4DwArfY1: "NANI?!"

*Th4DwArfY1 Yeets Yoink

[TD1]

Okay, so I am become drama, the breaker of society.

Her best friend is definitely my type.

Feck

[Doomblade187]

Okay, so I am become drama, the breaker of society.

Her best friend is definitely my type.

Feck

I see a clear solution.

Ask our her best friend. :3

I say this because you are not in a relationship with other girl at this time.

[hector13]

Like, there's not really anything to be bothered about going on or particularly dramatic that I can see, taking it from my emotionally-stunted and pragmatic POV.

If you haven't made any suggestions - explicit or otherwise - you're romantically interested in girl 1, then you don't really have anything to worry about. If she does eventually broach the topic, you say you're not interested in her in that way, and continue with your existence. It may be awkward, but only if you let it be awkward.

If you are romantically interested in her friend, then you make the moves on her, whatever that entails. If the initial girl gets bent out of shape over this, that is entirely, 100% her problem, not yours, because you can't help if you're so gosh darned magnetic that you make people wanna get in your man pants through sheer force of personality.

I think the trick here is doing what you did to the first girl to the second one. Good luck with that.

fackin' ninjas

[TD1]

I just feel like there are muddy waters in these parts. It's a big social knot which I'm not equipped to deal with. Also, while I'm certain of the other girl's intent, not so much with her.

Good advice though, thanks.

[Naturegirl1999]

When and how did humans invade the Mushroom Kingdom? How and why was a human put in charge? I am talking of course about the Mario universe

[Egan_BW]

They're not humans; Mario, Luigi, and Peach are all actually fungi.