Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

Labor camp

4 (20%)

List of choices (would you like to be killed by woodchipper, firing squad, gascambers...)

8 (40%)

Choose how to die (with restrictions, or course, no "I want to be nuked in the dining hall")

6 (30%)

Generic Lethal injection

1 (5%)

Electroshock

0 (0%)

Life in prison

0 (0%)

Other (Specify)

1 (5%)

No opinion

0 (0%)

Total Members Voted: 20

[XXSockXX]

"The derail punches the thread in the head and the severed part sails off in an ark!"

[ghjijhg]

We can't go to the moon because there is no internet there.
We need to create a clone of the internet. It is the only way.

Best derail ever.

EDIT: Bookmark'd

[misko27]

The Bay Watcher Gestures at the Thread and The Thread begins to move!

I agree with you here eggnog, we're screwed without a plan. The out-numberedness is rectifiable, as we will most likely have access to cloning facilities, and we must train alot to have a chance. I reccommned that we institute some sort of operation to trick the governments of earth into not mobilizing for long enough to allow us to set up a defensible position. Somewhere where people wouldn't care about a war, and just write it off as another week's bad news. Some unpronouncible african country, maybe.

Weapons. Hmm.

Somewhere, Sanity is shitting itself.

[slowpokez]

Maybe we could engineer the martians into some sort of primitive, booze based blob that eats rotten corpses, and then stick a tap onto the side of this creature. THEN, we coul dride said creature as mounts of war, and have a refreshing drink mid-battle, reducing ineffectiveness due to people running off to drink.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

If text is too small...uhm

When will we be ready to strike?

-It's not a question of when as much as a question of where...
We are still waiting for people to decide on a location.

-What a shame, however the "testtube-baby program" is coming along at an accepteble pace.

-Indeed'

-I am still firmly against the idea of jar babies. I simply cannot allow my ethical standards to sink that low.

Fine. Large stone pot babies.

(Is his pants made of gold?)

This derail is BADASS.

[Hanslanda]

That is simultaneously beautiful and horrifying in the best possible way. I award you an internet for use on the martian/lunar landscape.

[Corai]

Slowpokez, if I had money i'd be throwing it at my computer screen.

[misko27]

Holy crap. *applause*. Thats absolutely brilliant.

[King DZA]

Slowpokez, that piece of art has earned you one slow and assuring nod of approval from yours truly. Be proud.

Now then, I'm confident that conversion over straight up invasion would successfully eliminate most of the obstacles associated with the latter. All we need to do, is start a religious Mars cult that accurately depicts our glorious colonized planet as the holy land that it will so obviously be. A holy land that only those who offer their cooperation can travel to.

When you speak to someone's greatest desires, such as being accepted into a supposed utopia, you bypass their will, and can turn even your most hated enemy into your best servant friend. Not to mention, we won't need to stress over coming up with a landing spot, as they will come to us.

[WaffleEggnog]

This thread, this fucked up thread. I really cant stress enough how badass derail this is. Im deciding whether i should make another topic just about this, or if i should keep this here as a model to what babby threads on bay12 strive to be, or just an example of what this forum is on.

Slowpokez, that piece of art has earned you one slow and assuring nod of approval from yours truly. Be proud.

Now then, I'm confident that conversion over straight up invasion would successfully eliminate most of the obstacles associated with the latter. All we need to do, is start a religious Mars cult that accurately depicts our glorious colonized planet as the holy land that it will so obviously be. A holy land that only those who offer their cooperation can travel to.

When you speak to someone's greatest desires, such as being accepted into a supposed utopia, you bypass their will, and can turn even your most hated enemy into your best servant friend. Not to mention, we won't need to stress over coming up with a landing spot, as they will come to us.

Wowowowo...... your getting ahead of ourselfs here. We still dont have were we are going, or how we are going to get there, set in stone yet!

One thing that no-one has mentioned is; how are we going to get to were we want to go? I know that all of us play DF here, so rocket science isnt a problem, but we need some people on that, ASAP.

Engineering plants and animals for food, so, if we choose to, we can be self-sufficiant, which would be a requirment to invade earth. Some peole... get on that

Enginering/building places for us to live and breath. Get on that.

We need to find out were to go, and when to go, and how to go, SO MUCH MUST BE DONE!!!

Warning: big picture, zoom out to 75/50%

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 

[Hanslanda]

All those issues can be easily solved by the modding department.

[GreatWyrmGold]

Hm, if my parents got me that genetic engineering kit for Christmas a few years back...
Kidding, of course. Not that I'm sure how I'd get the bovine and cockroach germ cells anyways.

Of course, trying to live on the Martian surface would be moronic. Besides, you have to consider: Even if we do decide to invade Earth, our base would need to be fairly near the Earth. On Luna, we would not only be close enough to Terra for continued Internet use, we could also launch rocks or something at the earthly aggressors without too much of an issue. In fact, our spacecraft would be six times easier to launch, and would therefore be six times as fuel-efficient per ton, as compared to Terran spacecraft. So, subterranean communities on the Moon would probably be best. Sure, we lose magma, but that just means we'd have fewer deaths from magma (important, when we've got only a few thousand people!) and that we'd need to use more virtual magma.

Another question: I can't think of a good way to sorta go around this lightly, but our ability to survive kinda requires a decent female:male ratio. How many women, girls, ladies, etc, are there compared to those of the male gender?

[King DZA]

Another question: I can't think of a good way to sorta go around this lightly, but our ability to survive kinda requires a decent female:male ratio. How many women, girls, ladies, etc, are there compared to those of the male gender?

You didn't read through the whole thread, did you Wyrm?

[misko27]

Going over previous records, I'd say not great. Demographics thread lists the vast majority of us as being between 15-30 males. Honesty is not required, so it may be better then current expectations, but by and large, its a sausage fest. Thats why we went onto cloning. test-tubers. 

Anyway, If nesasary, we can set up 2 outposts, one of mars, and one on the moon. We always expected to control the moon anyway. HOWEVER, and moves on the moon must be soon, as some US military chief plans a military base on the moon, which would complicate matters.

And remember, we don't need to be self-sufficient from the get-go, instead we can grow self-sufficient. This way we enjoy trade with earth, without giving up our dreams of a pan-solar empire.

[Hanslanda]

Another question: I can't think of a good way to sorta go around this lightly, but our ability to survive kinda requires a decent female:male ratio. How many women, girls, ladies, etc, are there compared to those of the male gender?

You didn't read through the whole thread, did you Wyrm?

The fact of the matter is, Wyrm, that the majority of Bay12ers are one of three things:
Male (majority)
Gay/Bi/Other male
Gay/Bi/Other female

I don't think I've actually seen a straight female posting here, which is somewhat odd. Anyone know of one? Surely we have one straight female amongst the 5000 ish people that play DF?

[GreatWyrmGold]

Another question: I can't think of a good way to sorta go around this lightly, but our ability to survive kinda requires a decent female:male ratio. How many women, girls, ladies, etc, are there compared to those of the male gender?

You didn't read through the whole thread, did you Wyrm?

Um, nope, sorry. That's why I missed the test-tube babies stuff...

Going over previous records, I'd say not great. Demographics thread lists the vast majority of us as being between 15-30 males. Honesty is not required, so it may be better then current expectations, but by and large, its a sausage fest. Thats why we went onto cloning. test-tubers.

Not ideal, but meh. If we clone wisely, the issue will sort itself out in a generation.

Anyway, If nesasary, we can set up 2 outposts, one of mars, and one on the moon. We always expected to control the moon anyway. HOWEVER, and moves on the moon must be soon, as some US military chief plans a military base on the moon, which would complicate matters.

And remember, we don't need to be self-sufficient from the get-go, instead we can grow self-sufficient. This way we enjoy trade with earth, without giving up our dreams of a pan-solar empire.

Hm, so...I call a spot on the Lunar outpost.

Another question: I can't think of a good way to sorta go around this lightly, but our ability to survive kinda requires a decent female:male ratio. How many women, girls, ladies, etc, are there compared to those of the male gender?

You didn't read through the whole thread, did you Wyrm?

The fact of the matter is, Wyrm, that the majority of Bay12ers are one of three things:
Male (majority)
Gay/Bi/Other male
Gay/Bi/Other female

I don't think I've actually seen a straight female posting here, which is somewhat odd. Anyone know of one? Surely we have one straight female amongst the 5000 ish people that play DF?

...Yeah, let's invest in cloning. Either that, or get some of the "gay/bi/other women" to have a bunch of artificially inseminated babies. They would, of course, be excused from heavy labor or military action if we did this.

So, this is all just a thought experiment, right? We don't actually have enough organization or funding or permits or anything to do this, do we? If we do...where do I sign up for real?