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Author Topic: Suika Fortress: Free mode! CrossedHorns over...  (Read 58773 times)

CaptainArchmage

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #135 on: August 06, 2012, 04:22:44 am »

Thank God Syanas, I was worried about the preservation of my... character development.
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Darvi

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #136 on: August 06, 2012, 06:28:15 am »

STAY DEAD, ME!

Dammit.
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Syanas

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #137 on: August 06, 2012, 07:36:06 am »

You're a legendary miner thanks to the artifact you made, so you're basically extremely dangerous with a pick. Your kid's got a broken leg though.
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NotaPirate

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #138 on: August 06, 2012, 08:10:13 am »

Granite 20, Year 108
________________________
"You're in charge now."

"What?"

"I said you're in charge. Now get out of here, I'm in the middle of my training."

Before long I found himself standing blankly in the meeting room, without a clue of what to do. "You're in charge now." Was what the previous commander of the fort, Syanas the gorgeous crazy hammersuika told me. Not that I actually knew what being in charge meant. I'm a pirate, I do pirate-y things. None of the governing stuff for me, no sir!


Great swinging ear lobes? Totally hot material.

Of course, I had no choice, because all the suikas were now staring at me for orders.

"Uh, just do whatever you were doing. Thanks." I mumbled. Some of them gave dubious looks, but others just grumbled a little as they went back to work. I swore I saw Totaku rotating his finger around his temple in the background. I told him to get back to digging.

"So..." I took a look around the fort. Everything seemed almost new to me, even though I've been around for nearly a year.

"Hey..."

My eyes caught the sight of a bunch of levers. Levers! I used to pull them in my pirating days, if I ever had pirating days. I rubbed one of the knobs slowly, drooling as I thought what might happen if I pulled it.

"Uh," Scruffy raised his head from the fields of plump helmets, "I don't think you should pull any of that."

"A lever is meant to be pulled," I replied sharply, "and this, this lever is asking to be pulled. Hard."

Scruffy looked at Nyotor, who shrugged. Then he looked back at me.

"Well I don't know what those levers do either, but I'm sure there were notes that Sya-"

I wasn't listening. With a single grunt I slammed the lever down with all my worth, hearing the sweet grind of stone as the gears turned. I grinned and wiped my sweat in satisfaction, my lever pulling urges satisfied. I turned back, to see that a wall had now lowered itself. It was...a bridge?

"Hey! The outside!"

"There are corpses outside too, let's loot em!"

"Hey, wait!" I couldn't even say another word as I was stampeded over by a few suikas, all clamouring to stake their claim on the loot of their dead friends. I personally don't care about the looting, and I was just about to dust myself off and walk awa-


F**k.

"Oh geez!"

"The undead!"

"I think I wet my pants!"

"Get back here you nitwits!" I roared. There was no time to waste. I scribbled a few places to be designated as a burrow and ordered everyone back in. More grumblings, but we got everyone safely in. What remained the problem was that those damned undead were going to do the same. I had to do something.

"Pull all the levers!"

Heliopolis dropped the mushroom he was about to put into a stockpile, "are you serious?"

"Pull them like you damned well meant it," I hissed, slamming one onto the right with a single thrust. A squelch. All the suikas who heard it immediately looked outside.


Did I just?

The undead were gone. Appeared in their place was the sickening blood, now smashed to paste under the bridge. Ah. I know what to do now.

"Read the notes," I finally said, "we're going to pull the ones at the entrance. All of them wretched corpses can have a little taste of suikan atom physics."

I enlisted the help of two other suikas to smash the levers left and right. Tempt them with an unguarded entrance, then smash them right out! We did this for quite awhile till most of the zombies outside the entrance were either gone or crushed. As I would later find out, this would be a good idea.

On an unrelated side note, one of our dead diagnosticians had risen and started haunting the fort. He was put to rest after being memorialised.



1st Slate, Year 108

Things were going swimmingly. And by that I meant that I was busy exploring the fort. It was tiring, going up and down. Everyone was doing their own designated tasks, so I had little to do, thankfully enough.

And then suddenly...


Migrants!

The sign of them first came when I heard thumping of footsteps above me. Steady, lively footsteps, not like the shambling shuffles of those accursed undead.

"Anyone home?"

"No one's here, I say we just head back..."

"Oh man, this place is creepy..."

Whispers. I started to panic. How were they supposed to get in? In a rare gesture of both sympathy and annoyance, Syanas informed me that the bridges I had been encrusting with undead blood were part of the entrance way for the migrants to get in. Well, blow me. I told everyone to stop smashing the levers and hoped that the new suikas could get in safely. After all, most of the undead outside must've been gone thanks to our cleansing...

"Hey, look! An undead!'

"It's alone, beat it up! Smash it into fine pulp!"

Oh dear.

The suikas finally arrived, some of them bloodied, but mostly triumphant.

"Where's your leader?" I inquired, upon giving some of them jobs to do.

"She's outside," One of them stated bluntly, "got her leg smashed open."

"Ah," I opened my mouth in realisation, "and, none of you thought of helping?"

My words were met with snorts of laughter. I guess not.


You have more worries than getting caught in the rain

Etur, that's the name of that poor suika. She started tantruming, shouting about how the world was so unfair to her. I know because I could hear her muffled cries above. Only Suika herself knows why Etur didn't freak out at the sight of the zombies. She must've been really pissed.

She came back eventually, but not before tantruming in the fort again. I wonder if I should have smashed her open when she came. Sounded like a really good idea then.

Bridges lifted, barriers up, then I realised we didn't have a hospital. Beds have been designated, but the room hadn't been carved out yet. I immediately ordered to miners to get to it. Furniture were safely installed in empty rooms incase we hadn't had enough room for everyone. I shuddered in disdain at the cramped rooms. Sure, they had plenty of furniture, but they were meagre quarters. I had always been told that every suika should sleep in good, spacious rooms filled with awesome. I shall have to fix this issue soon.


Totally built for comfort.

Thankfully, we had material for some traction benches, and spare cloth, crutches splints. Etur was put to bed in no time.

As for the military, I designated some of the suikas to join, although they had to do it without any sort of weapon. Seeing this, I told CaptainArchmage and the rest of the miners to get to digging into the cavern, in hopes that we would find something other than zinc. Some precious gems were uncovered, but nothing of use as of yet.

Disaster! Etur is growing thirsty! Before she was able to walk with her crutch to the barrels, but now it seems like an impossible task for her. We need to build a well. Now.

I don't exactly know how a well works, but hey, we have cavern water, and so I ordered a miner to dig a path straight above the cavern floor and installed a well. Now we have an unlimited supply of water. Hopefully.


Definitely Suika-falling-into-the-water-proof.



1st Slate

As the new month approached, something else did.


Hippie vans!

Will they make it? Will we finally have some wood to use?


Lolnup.

Then there's the problem of whether I should risk the entire military for wood and these hippies. I decided to wait, despite seeing Syana's fingers itching to grab that hammer. I swear she's making me nervous.

The Parsees didn't make it. Guess I'll have to wait.

Meanwhile....


Hoho. Ohohoho.


Whoever sent them must be a sadist.

I've lifted the bridges for them to arrive. Hopefully they won't get mobbed by the undead before then.


They're here!

SLAM THE LEVERS! LET THE BRIDGES BE DYED IN THEIR BLOOD!


Hoho. Hohohoho.

Yuuka would've been pleased.

In retrospect, smashing them open with the stone fall traps would've allowed us to loot them, but there's always next time.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2012, 08:26:56 am by NotaPirate »
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NotaPirate

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #139 on: August 06, 2012, 08:41:31 am »

Summer.



8th Hematite

Scotty287 has been missing for a week. I have no idea what happened to him. Mayhaps a by product of my atom physics experimentation?

CaptainArchmage has given me wonderful news:


Tertra-bloody-hedrite!

Finally! An ore worth kissing! Man the furnaces people, we're going to-


Ah, nevermind then.

Disaster!


The file name is 'pigeonsex' I couldn't help it.

The military is, for some reason, still incredibly lacking. I will have to keep an eye on this beast once in a while. It shouldn't be able to reach my fort. Or should it?


A seigakkuri corpse. The irony.



Wymar begins a mysterious construction. I didn't know how I had hare bones, but thankfully they were there when he needed them.


holy-

I've received reports that the uninvited guest has broken in from the caverns! Damn, why didnt' I think of blockading the doors?!

I hear Patchouli's cries below. The pigeon is going up, but it's only a matter of time before it heads down to kill off everyone mining below.

"CaptainArchmage," I turned my head sharply, "I'm afraid I'll need to put your mining skills..."


Oh perfect. Just perfect.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2012, 09:27:20 am by NotaPirate »
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Darvi

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #140 on: August 06, 2012, 09:14:50 am »

What the everflying fuck is a Gosm and why is it having sex in our caverns?
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Nyotor Lizardhammers

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #141 on: August 06, 2012, 12:42:58 pm »

Ah, flying FBs. Dwarf Fortress's way of saying "fuck your walls".
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Nyo Ho Ho!

Darvi

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #142 on: August 06, 2012, 12:55:13 pm »

fuck your walls
I'd post that in the OoC thread, but Derm still scares me a bit.
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GoombaGeek

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #143 on: August 06, 2012, 01:10:09 pm »

Oh god it's a pigeon made out of sex

So what happens when we get something too big to atomsmash? :D
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My wooden badge was delicious.

Syanas

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #144 on: August 06, 2012, 02:46:39 pm »

Considering I didn't build any defenses for the caverns other than the Great Wall of Fail, I do kind of remember sealing the drawbridge in the caverns before I handed over the save.

That is, unless Pirate decided to pull all the levers. Then yeah, we're boned.

Also, noxious secretions. Don't quite remember what they do, but I do remember we have a bunch of tallow and a vacant soap maker's shop.
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Darvi

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #145 on: August 06, 2012, 03:33:23 pm »

Oh god it's a pigeon made out of sex
Urge... to quote... rising...
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Person

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #146 on: August 07, 2012, 01:00:21 am »

Edit: I derped, just ignore this. I thought this was still the first page and nothing had happened yet.
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Patchouli

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #147 on: August 07, 2012, 01:19:48 am »

Oh no, I'm dead?
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NotaPirate

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #148 on: August 07, 2012, 06:48:38 am »

@Patchouli: Nay, Sex the Gosm decided to go up instead of down, so you were safe from its necrophiliac clutches. Although if it had went down, the miners would've clobbered its arse anyway.


"Go daddy, beat him up good!"

Go Suikas! Show the sex pigeon how pointy our horns are!


This Peachick is badass


His heart isn't even working anymore. How is he not dead.


I have no idea what he's going to do with it, but he can hump it for all I care.

The beast is dead, hurrah!

I congratulate Syanas and the rest of the suikas for their hard work. Some of them grinned and stuck thumbs up. Some were not so lucky...


"Oh, hey my right horn is rotten! Heheh. Hahaha. Oh it's so funny."


Atis is doing his individual combat drill while his arm is dancing about in the caverns. He's a total role model, I tell you.



Oblivious to what was going on around him, Wyamar proceeds to finish his work, becoming a legendary engraver in the process.


spikes on a crown? That's like sticking birthday candles inside a cake.


Even in death the pigeon refuses to retract its necrophiliac nature

Of course, the pigeon isn't going down without a fight, no sir, it will fight till the end.



Disaster!



Having heard of the sex pigeon, more migrants decide to join. I attempt to smash the bridge on them, but Patchy slaps my hand away in time. Oh well, guess I'll bring them in then.

There weren't many migrants. One of them lost their way and was promptly munched on. Most of us were still bothered about the pigeon reviving again, so I had put most of my attention to it instead. Thankfully it was thrown into the refuse with little casualties during its reanimation.

Following Gosm the sex's revivals I have ordered the construction of a butchery and a tanner's workshop next to the refuse for easy processing, as well as more space dug behind so that more refuse may be put. Gosm was then successfully butchered without incident.


We're swimming in meat!

I hastily order a cook to get to preparing all this delicious meat. Oh, the sweet smell of sex pigeon meat is already in my mind. What ho!



OH DAMMIT. MY LIVER. WHY.

*Hastily scribbled on a bloodied note*

Pirate has succumbed to injuries from a broken spine. He was, thankfully buried before he came back. I personally don't like him much but it seems like I will have to take on his name.

- 'Pirate' Wheelancient, 25th Galena



Atis has finally cracked under pressure. We subdued him, but many of us are miserable from the undead and killing. I might end up like Atis soon, if we don't have anything to cheer us up.

Many people have gone missing, including Arashi,  The cause of it, I do not know.

Chaore has turned melancholy, muttering about boneless skeletons. Make no mistake, this is a tantrum spiral. This might be the end of half the fort. Even the human merchants that can arrived here have gone insane for some reason. We could not order any of their wood.

Atis has revived and brought another suika to rest with him. I am beginning to fear for my life.

I gave up the mining expedition. For now everyone must start building better rooms for everyone. Rooms that will cheer us up even when we are not sleeping in them.



More migrants, on the other side of the land. I opened my bridges, hoping that they may join before the undead claim them.

They eventually make it without casualties, despite the undead humans lumbering outside.

14th Sandstone:


Highzealot has been possessed and took over a workshop. I pray he has the materials to finish whatever project he has in mind.




Now that suitable bedrooms have been carved out, I will start assigning them to the military suikas to cheer them up. That is, if I am ever able to recover any logs....



Periodic cleansing. When all the undead outside are more or less cleared I shall see if I can't cut down the trees outside.
« Last Edit: August 07, 2012, 08:41:20 am by NotaPirate »
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Grimlocke

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Re: Suika Fortress: Cross Forum Edition! CrossedHorns: Spring 107
« Reply #149 on: August 07, 2012, 05:29:42 pm »

My doubts over using atomsmashers have been lifted! We are still headed to hell just fine.
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