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Author Topic: Things that don't happen.  (Read 97544 times)

Scootagoose

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #390 on: November 11, 2012, 04:38:29 am »

Marksdwarf doesn't strike Goblin Maceman with *Iron Crossbow* but instead actually fires a bolt at him, as he remembered to grab ammo
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Unf.

vadia

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #391 on: November 11, 2012, 01:31:58 pm »

Catten SyrupAbbeys: "Oh it's just a reanimated mussel shell. It's harmless."
In fact the reanimated mussel shell IS harmless.
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hops

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #392 on: November 11, 2012, 02:11:51 pm »

Urist McLotsoffriends did not go berserk because he still has other friends beside Urist McDead!
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

One True Polycule with flame99 <3

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ZzarkLinux

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #393 on: November 11, 2012, 03:42:19 pm »

Spoiler: This (click to show/hide)

Not because you can't put coffins on tracks, but because the zombies won't stay in the coffins  :-[
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Archereon

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #394 on: November 11, 2012, 04:10:09 pm »

Urist McDwarf cancels pull lever to drop bridge on head: Not that bloody stupid.
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I want to tell you they were bad men, cephalo.  I want to tell you that with a better overseer the Fortress never would've gotten so bad someone would get offed in a pointless fisticuffs.
But the sad truth charlie?
It was inevitable.

itisnotlogical

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #395 on: November 11, 2012, 04:51:19 pm »

Urist McAxedwarf cancels Dodge Training Spikes: No room to dodge.
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This game is Curtain Fire Shooting Game.
Girls do their best now and are preparing. Please watch warmly until it is ready.

piemanpie24

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #396 on: November 11, 2012, 05:40:09 pm »

Urist McDwarf: "I'd like to welcome you all to the first Alcoholics Anonymous meeting."
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daveralph1234

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #397 on: November 11, 2012, 06:01:56 pm »

Urist McDwarf: "I'd like to welcome you all to the first Alcoholics Unanimous meeting."
Fixed that for you

Jetman123

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #398 on: November 12, 2012, 05:02:52 am »

Urist McLotsoffriends did not go berserk because he still has other friends beside Urist McDead!

Urist McLotsoffriends becomes a pillar of the Dwarven community for dealing with loss, and holds community meetings to assist other dwarves in getting over their grief in a healthy manner!
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When dwarves want to commit suicide, then by Armok, they _will_ commit suicide, even if they have to spend the rest of their lives working at it!

Findulidas

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #399 on: November 12, 2012, 08:29:11 am »

So we embarked on a terrifying forest and nothing happened and no one died.
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...wonderful memories of the creeping sense of dread...

hops

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #400 on: November 13, 2012, 12:30:11 am »

Unicorn cancel kill dwarves: Not evil
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she/her. (Pronouns vary over time.) The artist formerly known as Objective/Cinder.

One True Polycule with flame99 <3

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0cu

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #401 on: November 13, 2012, 03:54:25 am »

Urist McDwarf cancels Drink: Sparring.
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laularukyrumo

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #402 on: November 13, 2012, 05:47:53 am »

Urist resumes Construct Floor: Not so lazy that he won't scrape a millimeter of ice away
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Quote from: Dwarfotaur
Everytime one of my militia has given birth in the Danger Room, it's lead to instant baby smoothies for everyone.

Gotta Catch 'Em All!

Dat Sig Thread

Akura

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #403 on: November 30, 2012, 01:40:43 pm »

"Ugh, this solid lead statue is heavy. Hey Urist, you want to help me move this thing?"
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Quote
They asked me how well I understood theoretical physics. I told them I had a theoretical degree in physics. They said welcome aboard.
... Yes, the hugs are for everyone.  No stabbing, though.  Just hugs.

TheZoomZoll

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Re: Things that don't happen.
« Reply #404 on: November 30, 2012, 03:18:52 pm »

Random Stupid Cat claws Urist in the first toe bruising the fat
Urist doesnt bitch about being too injured by a tiny tiny wound to kill a small cat and stabs the cat in the chest with the iron sword
Urist carries the body back to the corpse stockpile and doesnt use soap or water and takes it like any normal human would,with no fear of a small 1 inch scratch and becomes a brave hero of the order of sane dwarves
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