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[misko27]

Urist McMiner: Well, I've finished my assignment of work. Huh, Urist McOtherMiner is far away, and the stone hes designated to dig is blocking everything else. I'll do it for him.

[XXSockXX]

"The Giant Sponge has been struck down.
The Fisherdwarf stands up."

[Eldestish]

Planty Mcplump helmet man: I'm a plant *Melts in magma*

[WaffleEggnog]

Urist McNoble; "Lets get to work!"

Urist McHauler; "Done"

Urist McMiner; "Run from the Magma!!!1"

Urist McLegendaryBadass; "Im alive
Urist McUslessRecruit; "Im dead"

Urist McFisher; "That was a nice, uninterrupted day of fishing!"

Urist McSockcollecter; Better move this sock out of the doorway and put it back were it belongs"

Urist McEveryone; "Aw man, my pet died! Il have to get a new one!"

Urist McMilitary; "Better put on my armour and get my weapon!"

Urist McArcher; "Out of ammo! Better get some more!"

Urist McBrewer; *makes booze*

Urist McAssistant; "Sir, sir! We have an emergancy! Urisy McLegendaryBadass, the only reliable defence for this fort, is fataly wounded! We have to get to him quick!
Urist McDoctor; "Someones life is at stake? Get my tools!"

Mr and Mrs Urist; "Son, can you go get us some steak and a pint of milk?"
Urist McChild; "Yes mom....."

[SixOfSpades]

Xnob Stusongast, Goblin Spearman: "So, guys, I stood up on that hill over there and looked down into the dwarves's fort, and it seems that the only thing between us and them is a thin little "wall" made of nothing but sand. Hey, look, I can poke my spear right through it. Let's get digging."

Mestthos Ovoddastot, Dwarven Child: "Man, I just can't wait until my beard starts growing in!"

Lokum Hildesh, Dwarven Merchant: "Wait--hold on a second. There's no WAY I'm going to trade away our entire caravan of raw materials for nothing but a waterskin and a piccolo, no matter HOW nice they are."

Atru Flanrang, Goblin Engineer: "I see that the dwarves have underestimated us once again. How can they be so stupid? I mean, they know we forge our own metal weapons and armor. Do they really think we're incapable of carrying ladders, or bridging a 'moat' that's only 5 feet wide?"

Raccoon: "Well, I'm pretty sure they have gems or string or something in there, but I can't seem to get past this door. I don't think banging my head against it for 2 months is going to solve anything, I'll just give up and go away."

Rovod Fathlitast, bookkeeper: "Wait--you actually think that I know exactly how much we have of every type of good in the fortress, and that I even know the locations of things that are constantly moving, such as fish and logs currently being hauled inside? Whatever the hell gave you THAT idea? I mean, if I had that kind of mystical omniscience, what the hell am I doing working for someone like YOU?"

[Ria Hawk]

Urist McMechanic: Well, that automatic door's installed. ... Maybe I should move that dead butterfly. Nah, it's just a butterfly, the door will squish it.

[misko27]

"My family is dead, I must go mourn them. Go on homicidal rampage, what? What is wrong with you? Why would I beat people up?"

[Kumquat]

Urist McAnimalCaretaker: Aww poor wardog, did the mean goblin you killed smash your leg? Here, let me wash it and put a splint on it and this piece of cloth around it.

Urist McHunter: Meh, there is hardly a meal's worth of meat in a chinchilla. I'll go find something worth my time rather than waste bolts on that.

Urist McHunter2: What, the overseer wants me to catch that jaguar alive for the animal trainers? Okay, no problem.

Giant Kea: damn, this minecart made of lead and filled with galena is too heavy to fly with!

The flying (copper bolt) hits the wagon! It is not very effective...

[thegoatgod_pan]

The heroine of our fort is mildly injured and bedridden, her new born child is wandering the halls starving, let us have the father care for it, or else just have kndly strangers ensure that it doesnt simply die.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

i've been practising my stonecrafting skills for 5 years now. i think i'd class myself as proficient. my father died at 80, an acomplished engraver, having worked at his trade his entire life. elves, being immortal, spend thousands of years perfecting their skills to legendary, but every once in a generation, this fort sees a dwarf so gifted at his trade that he rivals even the elves


so, you want me to pull this lever that is connected to that training spear trap in the barracks? sure. haha! right in the balls, that will teach urist to pay more atention. again? ok... three times? man, that's sadistic... what? you want me to do continuously for 3 months? fuck this shit, i'm outa here. sadistic sick fuck...


the goblins are sieging, the fortress is counting on my axe! i'll just leave urist mcjunior with his daddy, i'd give my life for my child's safety. besides, it'd be fucking retarded to take a baby to a battle

[XXSockXX]

(around 60 Urists in my fort): "Grandpa just died of old age. He had 160 great years and he die peacefully in his sleep. It's sad, but at least he was not killed by goblins, so we're not gonna be too upset about this."

[Urist_McGamer]

Toady One "The Great" cancels work on Dwarf Fortress: Going on vacation.

Urist McChild has grown to become a teenager!
--Some time later--
Urist McChild has been arrested for vandalism.

[pisskop]

Urist McHunter, "Maybe if I leave the Alligator alone it won't num on my face..."

Urist Mchunter cancels haul corpse: in evil biome.

[Silverlock]

Uris McIdle:

"OK, let's see here. 
Option A: I can take 30 seconds to pull the lever that will save the fortress -- and myself -- from the marauding goblin horde, and THEN finish placing this sock into the stockpile.
Option B: I can go finish placing the sock on the stockpile and then pull the lever if I'm still alive.

I'll take option A!"

[Malecus]

Goblin O'Footsoldier: "Da boss gots killed by lotsa blades inna trap!  Let's run now and not stand and watch'm rot!"