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[pisskop]

Urist McDungeonMaster:  Let's capture and retrain these mounts.  Hell, let's breed some gobs and use them as underground defense!

[Broseph Stalin]

"Urist McBridgebuilder Ignores Fish: Not in any danger."

"My baby has been injured! I'll have to get it medical help immediately rather than ignore it until it's old enough to walk."

"Oh we're digging under the river? I guess there's no need to report to the Overseer every three seconds that the dirt is damp."

"Oh no, my masterwork barrel was destroyed! I guess that's okay, as I improve as a carpenter I'll make hundreds of masterpieces and that barrel was only used for storing putrefied animal fat."

"The hunter is having a hard time carrying that entire elephant, I better give him a hand."

"I'll move this butterfly so I can close the door."

"There's a bunch of meat in the butcher shop, I should probably focus on getting it to the stockpile before it rots."

"Battle? I better grab my weapon."

"Battle? This is probably a bad time to see if there's any other armor I'd like to wear."

"Battle? I'll just set this stuff I was carrying down."

Urist McSoldier Cancels Sleep: Battle.

"There are childsnatchers everywhere. I should play somewhere within earshot of an adult."

"It doesn't make sense to replace crossbow bolts as I fire them."

[Sus]

Dostngosp Terrorpants, Goblin Spearman: "Look, they haven't opened the gates all year. Screw you guys, I'm going home."
[edit]Actually happened in Trialfires.[/edit]

Båx, Giant toad cancels Take bath: protecting the spearmaster from drowning

Ûsbu, Giant bat cancels Hover in place: there's supposed to be a battle going on here.

Urist McLoiterer cancels On Break: Nearest dwarf to an important lever to pull.

Litast McCivilian cancels Path through caverns: There be Forgotten Beasts and unknown monsters here. Also, people seem to die in there a lot.

[Berossus]

Goblin McJarhead cancels Assault front Gate: Seven hundred cubic metres of Goblin/Troll debris spotted, not fucking stupid.

The Goblins have gained some insight in train: Abducted Dwarven children.
Urist McAbductedasbaby has become a miner.
UMC equips copper pick.
UMC uses copper pick on undefended rear wall made of sand. Its super effective.
You have discovered a vast underground dwarven fortress.
Raw Dwarven Flesh! Praise the abducted miners!

[vadia]

Urist McRandom- Hey, my wound got infected. Oh well, no big deal, I'll be fine.

But infected wounds are horrifying in real life too!

Urist McSensitiveAndKind: "Well, we already have enough beds, and we have enough sand and metal to make everything else. Let's just agree with the elves for once, and maybe they will favor us in trade."

I generally play that way.

[SixOfSpades]

Unil Ezaroddom, Furnace Operator: "Hey, did the caravan bring any more flux stone? We've got all this goblinite to smelt into steel."
Bekar Nishlitast, broker: "Um, they've got some dolomite, but it's already been formed into blocks."
Unil Ezaroddom, Furnace Operator: "Oh, that's fine, it all grinds down to powder just the same."

"She is short and skinny. Her very long hair is neatly combed. She is noticeably pregnant."

Urdim Kovashberul, Miner: "Now that the earthen ramps have been removed, those wild deer are trapped in that wooded valley. They are safe from attack and have plenty of grazing land, so now they will reproduce, and once there are enough of them, we can hunt them any time we want to."

[billybobfred]

Urist McIncumbent: Vote for me, because I personally forged our military's armor. All of it. Spears, helms, the whole nine yards. All my handiwork.
Urist McRival: Vote for me because I'm idle all the time and talked to you lazy bums.

Urist McVoter: McIncumbent still has my vote this year. I don't even know why McRival bothered running, he never contributes a thing...

[Sus]

Urist McSpeardorf stabs the Goblin bowman in the upper body with his *candy spear*, tearing apart the muscle and tearing the liver!
The *candy spear* has lodged firmly in the wound!
Urist McSpeardorf rips the *candy spear* loose from the Goblin bowman's upper body, spilling his stinking liver!

[vadia]

Urist McIncumbent: Vote for me, because I personally forged our military's armor. All of it. Spears, helms, the whole nine yards. All my handiwork.
Urist McRival: Vote for me because I'm idle all the time and talked to you lazy bums.

Urist McVoter: McIncumbent still has my vote this year. I don't even know why McRival bothered running, he never contributes a thing...

Wow! another way that DF mimics reality -- uncanny!

[strongrudder]

Urist McPlayer cancels Complain About Babysplosion on Forums: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

[decev]

Urist McAnimalCare cancels No Job: Caring for wounded animal

[WealthyRadish]

Urist McPlayer cancels Complain About Babysplosion on Forums: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

Urist McPlayer cancels Make Automatic Miscarriage Generator: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

[saltmummy626]

hm, why do we need to abandon this massively amazing and expensive city we have worked for so long to build? a great home built on the backs of many dwarven laborers? why not just... you know... start a new settlement without abandoning our fantastically adorned and well defended home?

urist mcminer; hm according to these survey marks, this stone is damp but it isn't anything that will actually seep into the tunnels, I guess Ill keep digging.

urist mcurist; woah! cog over there just turned into a werewolf, killed several people, then changed back. we need to get him into a cage quick!

urist mcguardcaptain; alright, well dont let it happen again, I wouldn't want to have to slap a fine on you or something. what? you didn't have anything to do with the production orders? oh, well im very sorry for the mix up ma'am, have a nice day.

urist mctrader; damned crows, I wish they would build a roof over this depot. still though, its no reason to up and leave. its not like they are threatening or anything.

goblin mcambusher; damn boss! you fell for that one! haha! let me just let you out of that cage. heh, those dwarves sure can be tricky sometimes eh?

urist mcplayer; maybe covering the entire map in burning molten rock isn't such a good idea.

[darkgloomie]

Urist McPlayer cancels Complain About Babysplosion on Forums: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

Urist McPlayer cancels Make Automatic Miscarriage Generator: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

Urist McPlayer cancels Edit Child Cap: Throwing Babies in Danger Room

now that's the dorfy thing to do.

 "Getoff, you're heavy and I can't fly with your fatass on my back"
Cave Swallow mount to his Goblin.

[pisskop]

Urist McPlayer cancels Complain About Babysplosion on Forums: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

Urist McPlayer cancels Make Automatic Miscarriage Generator: taking a few seconds to edit the child cap.

Urist McPlayer cancels Edit Child Cap: Throwing Babies in Danger Room

now that's the dorfy thing to do.

And completly practical. 

With training militiadorfs training in the dangerroom when uri Mcdumpsterbaby is thrown in they get hardened to atrocity and death.

If urist Mcbaby survives he gets TON of cool skills/scars.

you get rid of babez.