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Author Topic: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring  (Read 8730 times)

Skyrunner

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Evil Overlord, Now Hiring
« on: July 02, 2012, 02:12:06 pm »

In the year AF 1446, the evil Disilyne, the Merciless Slaughtermaster, the Other Dark One, the Harbinger of Chaos, the Diabolic Tactican, the Designer of Hells et al. swept over the continent of Rodon with his Legion and quickly subdued three kingdoms, oftentimes than not leaving swathes of dead villages and razed fields in his wake. About half of the continent is currently under the control of Disilyne, and the people of the land tremble under the iron fist of his rule. The other half has not yet been able to put aside their differences to conquer Disilyne's kingdom of terror yet, and thus the task falls to the heroes of the land who barely know how to grasp a sword when they start out and end up blademasters and great mages and with beautiful women.

Let us picture a landmass, surrounded by water. It is roughly continent-shaped, and has a sprinkling of island-shape islands strewn in a snaky archipelago on the south side. The centre has a high and treacherous chain of mountains obligatorily named the Backbone of Rodon with only three passes. There is a set of three volcanoes to the west of the center pass, each named Mt Sauron, Mt Hellinabox, and Mt Doomlava. At an equidistant point, or more precisely the interior circumscribed point, to each of the actively planet-killing volcanoes is a black citadel of gneiss and basalt, surrounded by rivers of molten rock and guarded by unsleeping minions of undeath, viz skeletons. Many a hero has come to the castle only to be struck down by the guards, or fall into a river and be burnt to a crisp before he hit the surface.

The souls of the dead heroes would never rest if they knew the castle was empty, and staffed only by a *cough* skeleton crew. No sane person would have an evil fortress in such OSHA-incompliant surroundings, and Disilyne was far from insane. He was many things, but not insane.

This time, picture a gleaming castle of white rocks, hanging banners of gay red and yellow colors with men in burnished silver breastplates patroling the walls. Ask any passerby, and they would grudgedly admit the ruler was fair, though never kind.
This is the real evil fortress of Disilyne.

In his evil, well-ventilated and bright throneroom that had no spike impaling the heads of innocents anywhere in sight, Disilyne in his bright black helmet with three small spikes and a magically darkened visor was having a nice cup of tea the  chief adviser politely refused and left an hour ago. Why he had done so, Disilyne could not understand. Perhaps he was one of those—shudder—Umericanes, who thought the idea of tea as worse than pigs' mud. He mused over the advice given to him: since the Empire of Tyranny had grown so large yet was now in a state of stasis, an unusual strategy was needed. He thought over the situation; to the west there was no land at all to challenge Tyranny. To the south, the Archepelagos of Terfor were steadfast in their naval-based resistance. Legion didn't quite cut it. To the east was the Backbone of Rodon, and the three heavily guarded passes of it. Being rather narrow, any attempt by Legion to break through would be disastrous at best. To the north there was two or so kingdoms that didn't think him a large threat, stupidly squabbling over a single strip of land that was barely fertile just because of honor.

 What he needed, offered the adviser carefully, was a small amount of strong 'heroes' to take lead, since he himself was quite busy with securing the territories. Let the underlings of the Other Dark One do all the work and claim the results. And if they grow too strong cut them from the stalk and throw them into the fire. It was a safe, waterproof plan. That also meant it was destined to go wrong, but Disilyne accepted the fact that he would die eventually. After all, it was a small price to pay for living a couple decade as a king.

He reached for his scribing tools and started penning . . .

Elite Evil Minions Needed

To further the great overlord Disilyne, the Merciless Slaughterer, the Other Dark One, The Harbringer of Chaos etc. 's conquest of Rodon, he requires five (5) underlings of the utmost evil but preferably not chaos, capable of:

(regardless of gender, will be referred to as 'he' below)
  • sowing discord, debauchery, and depravity wherever he goes
  • capable of good public relations
  • can follow orders but also take initiative
  • capable of basic tactics
  • have the ability to lead Legion troops into combat
  • have at least five years or more of evil experience
    • special cases may waive this requirement
  • have successfully conducted multiple AAA evil projects
  • ability to work in a team environment

Application is not first-come first-serve.


Fill out the below form:

Name:
Age:
Gender:

Description of self, including resumé, bio, appearance:

Physical and mental abilities— (six points is a +1, while each point is a 16% chance of a +1. All abilities start from -1, which is a 100% chance of -1. You have 12 points.)
Strength (used for physical attacks as well as strength)
Intelligence (used for rolling stuff like Think Of Way To Activate Superweapon)
Agility (used for dodging and hitting)
Charisma (used for talking with people and persuading or intimidating. Also doubles as a measure of will.)
Magic (used for, obviously, magic rolls*)
Legion (gives bonuses in combat rolls of the Legions you lead)

Skills— (6 skill points. Examples of skills are as follows, but you may create skills of your own with the GM's permission. Magic skill's cap is 1, because you are spending the skill point to learn magic. The rolls are influenced by the Magic stat. You may fluff your magic, or suffer Generica Magica*.)

: Magic
: One-hand swords
: Two-hand swords
: Blunt weapons
: Torture
: Public Relations
: Tactics
: Genre Savvy
: Disguise
: ‼SCIENCE‼
: Maniacal Laughter
: Attractiveness

(This list is obviously short and non-comprehensive. Think of your own skills if the above list doesn't suffice, especially since I did not spend too much time on creating the list >.>)
« Last Edit: July 03, 2012, 05:00:21 pm by Skyrunner »
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Darvi

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #1 on: July 02, 2012, 02:13:35 pm »

Yeah why not.

Name: Yieck
Age: Around the average age for a minion. I don't know at what age they get recruited.
Gender: I have always kinda wondered why this was relevant in a game that didn't rely on visuals. But yeah, dude.

Int: 2
Charisma: 6
Magic: 4

Magic: 1
Genre Savvy: 2
Attractiveness: 3
« Last Edit: July 02, 2012, 02:53:16 pm by Darvi »
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Caellath

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #2 on: July 02, 2012, 02:14:54 pm »

I'm here. WHY U NO RESERVE ME LIKE I ASKED?

((@GM: The magic rolls abbr is not complete.))

Spoiler: Character (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: July 04, 2012, 08:02:18 am by Caellath »
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"Hey steve." You speak into the air.
>Yes?
"Could you guys also make a hamburger out of this arm when they cut it off? I wanted to eat it just for the sake of tasting it."
>That is horrible and disgusting. It will no doubt set you apart and create fear in your team mates. So of course.

Darvi

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #3 on: July 02, 2012, 02:15:27 pm »

Because
Application is not first-come first-serve.
I guess.
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IronyOwl

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2012, 02:18:51 pm »

Oh hell yes. Maniacal laughter is even a skill! :P

Eeeeeeee!


And yes, I need to know how magic works. I need to know if I can have imp minions and just generally feign being a Dungeon Keeper. :3
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A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Caellath

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #5 on: July 02, 2012, 02:19:16 pm »

@Darvi: That excuse does not apply according to my logic.
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"Hey steve." You speak into the air.
>Yes?
"Could you guys also make a hamburger out of this arm when they cut it off? I wanted to eat it just for the sake of tasting it."
>That is horrible and disgusting. It will no doubt set you apart and create fear in your team mates. So of course.

Sinpwn

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #6 on: July 02, 2012, 02:50:51 pm »

Name: Morose
Age: 55
Gender: Male

Intelligence: 4
Magic: 6

Magic: 1
!!SCIENCE!!: 4
Insanity Immunity: 1

Appearance: A frail and slow looking man draped in a pitch black cloak with a hood that seems to obscure most of his face except his dull brown eyes regardless of whether it would seem possible at the moment. When he speaks, it is in a gravely, though energetic ramble.

Bio: Once an independent tinker, the day of Morose' crowning glory became a disaster. Unable to find a suitable power source for his ultimate invention, he looked beyond the world of mortals for the answer, spending much time learning the dark magics of ancient times. When he believed his own power was suitable to power this new device, he started the first test run. Predictably, this failed spectacularly, annihilating a large portion of the city he resided in and leaving his mental state with something to be desired. Now broke and homeless, Morose turns to Disilyne for income.

Resume: Strong work ethic, intimate knowledge of many forms of technology, familiar with the application of eldrich magics, quite evil.


It is time for some EVIL technomancy.
« Last Edit: July 02, 2012, 04:49:08 pm by Sinpwn »
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UltraValican

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #7 on: July 02, 2012, 03:36:40 pm »

Name: Tarvos the washed up Necromancer.
Age: 35
Gender: Man
Strength: 2 (3 points used)
Inteligence: 3(4 points used)
Magic: 3(4 points used)
Charisma:0 (1 point used)
All other stats are negative 1

Skills
Magic(Half-Assed Necromancy):1
Tactics:2
Public Relations: 2
‼Science‼: 1

Spoiler: Physical Description (click to show/hide)

Resume
Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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Spectr

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #8 on: July 02, 2012, 05:09:53 pm »

-snip-
« Last Edit: July 02, 2012, 05:51:25 pm by Spectr »
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Spectr

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #9 on: July 02, 2012, 05:38:38 pm »

Name: Luther
Age: 21
Gender: Male

Appearance: Luther is a man of average height, and better than average looks. His attire consists of a 3 piece suit. His hair hair is jet black, and his eyes have a hazel tint.

Bio: Born into the world of evil corporations Luther has many years experience in running a (evil) business. His father being a cruel man forced Luther to work his way up in the company, allowing Luther learn how to relate trick people. In his journey he spent a many years in marketing, accounting, research, and management. Now, Luther is looking to change things up a bit, to annoy his father, and to learn more things to further his abilities.

Physical and mental abilities
- Intelligence 2
- Charisma 5
- Legion 2

Skills—
: Torture 1
: Public Relations 2
: Tactics 2
: ‼SCIENCE‼ 1

« Last Edit: July 02, 2012, 05:51:10 pm by Spectr »
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DinosaurusRex_x

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #10 on: July 02, 2012, 05:40:51 pm »

Spoiler: So much blood... (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: July 03, 2012, 08:07:46 pm by DinosaurusRex_x »
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IronyOwl

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #11 on: July 02, 2012, 06:05:06 pm »

Spoiler: Character (click to show/hide)
« Last Edit: July 03, 2012, 03:07:09 pm by IronyOwl »
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Quote from: Radio Controlled (Discord)
A hand, a hand, my kingdom for a hot hand!
The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

Scelly9

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #12 on: July 02, 2012, 06:26:17 pm »

Spoiler: Ivan (click to show/hide)

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Dwarmin

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #13 on: July 02, 2012, 06:38:52 pm »

Name: Tali Stoneblack
Age: 120
Gender: Female

Resume:
Created as the Beast Master for Lord Arithmetas       (Deceased, Eaten by Escaped Dark Lord Eater)
Worked as Chief Weapon Keeper for Lord Snagglegrik                   (Deceased, Killed with magical Plotaxe)
Master Skulker and Enforcer for Lord Delgoda the Demon King        (Sealed in own Eterno-o-sphere for a period no greater than one million eons and/or prophecy mandated release)
Master Poisoner and Master Piebaker for Lady Shadowbritches (Deceased, Pie Poisoning)
Arch-Dungeon Designer and Trap-Setter for Lord Minotas        (Deceased, killing in collapsing lair)

~....and you could be next!
----
Bio: Tali Stoneblack is one of the little known results of 'Evil Clone V.4' project-the second to last and some say greatest (and second most idiotic) of the Dark Lord Arithmetas fabled Hero experiments. Created from the stock of a dozen of the greatest Dwarf Thieves (and 2 dozen not so good to fill in the empty spots) Tali was unleashed from her home castle just in time to see Arithmetas eaten by his last creation, the four lobed purple tentacled Dark Lord Eater-ostensibly to be used against his rivals, but released by group of extra-plucky heroes for ironic effect.

He was no lauded for their final invention, which plagues Dark Lords to this day.

Tali became a mercenary by trade-using her mind, charm and wits to find work where ever it came. Mostly she stole shiny things-some for a mysterious Elf woman sometimes seen as her companion. She found work for four concurrent Dark Lords, each who invariably met quick and gruesome deaths from teams of plucky heroes who had escaped their dungeons.

Only when the recent Dark Lord conquered half the world, Tali decided to work for him-at least, until she could betray and rob him blind, like she had her last four employers.

Appearance: A very short but well muscled Dwarven woman stands before you, with dark black hair done up in the latest fashion of evil-tucked into a double ponytails. Piercing red eyes like blood rubies radiate cunning and a merciless intellect, and are framed by long, emotive eyebrows that give her a extremely unsettling demeanor.

She seems to have a constant smile on her face, but it's not very welcoming....at all.

Physical and mental abilities—
Strength     1
Intelligence  3
Agility         3
Charisma     1
Magic         -1
Legion        -1

Skills—
: One-hand Axe       2
: Sneaking              2
: Betrayal               2
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Caellath

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Re: Evil Overlord, Now Hiring— 0/5
« Reply #14 on: July 02, 2012, 06:46:00 pm »

What does that "Charisma also count as will" mean? Is it willpower and it is connected to charisma?
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"Hey steve." You speak into the air.
>Yes?
"Could you guys also make a hamburger out of this arm when they cut it off? I wanted to eat it just for the sake of tasting it."
>That is horrible and disgusting. It will no doubt set you apart and create fear in your team mates. So of course.
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