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Author Topic: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!  (Read 3053 times)

Gears

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New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« on: June 28, 2012, 09:08:13 pm »

 :-[  So the "human" diplomat arrives.. Madum Udngistrath.

The thing is, the diplomat is neither human nor much of a diplomat.  Descrp for Madum.

"A towering hairy lizard twisted into humanoid form.  It squirms and fidgets. It's slate grey hair is unkempt.  Beware it's poisonous vapors!

He is wiry."

Alright so I'm thinking hey, it's a diplomat, no problem right?  It heads straight for my statue hall, and begins lighting up the dorfs.  Whiskey Tango Foxtrot.  The crap this thing breathes seems to do nothing at first, and in about 2mins or so, the said dorf is dead.  So i've isolated him to the statue hall by his little lonesome, and have began to stage my army outside the doors, getting ready to charge in and slaughter him.. well until I notice the second part of his tag.  "deity"   ...great.

So in the grand scheme of things, how tough is a deity?
« Last Edit: June 28, 2012, 09:20:58 pm by Gears »
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Gavakis

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #1 on: June 28, 2012, 10:27:57 pm »

There a little tough, but four or five of full armoured dwarves could probobly kill it.
Be careful if it sprays gasses, it will probobly brutaly murder your dwarves then.
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weenog

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2012, 10:34:41 pm »

It's not a deity, it's a demon that fooled the humans.  Dwarves aren't so gullible, put a steel high boot up its ass.
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Listen up: making a thing a ‼thing‼ doesn't make it more awesome or extreme.  It simply indicates the thing is on fire.  Get it right or look like a silly poser.

It's useful to keep a ‼torch‼ handy.

Jacob/Lee

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2012, 10:37:09 pm »

Indeed. It's just a demon (or maybe a forgotten beast...), one clever enough to rise to power through the humans because humans are stupid. It dies just as easily as the rest of them, despite what the humans would want you to believe.

Gavakis

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #4 on: June 28, 2012, 10:39:26 pm »

Still remember, its a DEMON or a FB!
If you are in a newer fortress, dont try and attack it.
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misko27

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #5 on: June 28, 2012, 10:44:16 pm »

No, It starts off friendly, this is great, try to position your military around him as close as possible, then send the attack order. You may manage to get enough hits of him that you'll end his face.  If he starts breathing, get the important dwaves out the way, let your recruits deal with mop up. Also, Marksdwarves are utterly invaulable here.
« Last Edit: June 29, 2012, 12:10:10 am by misko27 »
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Quietust

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #6 on: June 28, 2012, 11:06:15 pm »

It's not a forgotten beast - it's always a unique demon that escaped from Hell during worldgen. Some of them take over Goblin civilizations by force, while others impersonate deities and manipulate Human civilizations from within.
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Gears

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #7 on: June 28, 2012, 11:07:06 pm »

Well as nasty as the demon was, and yeah you guys were right, that's what it was... I managed to isolate him in my statue hall, locked him in it, and carved fortifications in a wall next to it.  I positioned my dorf archer squad on the other side, and only took one casualty from the breath attack to my squad.  He took a few good bolts before he dropped though, considering my squad is all green outside of the legendary marksdwarf militia leader.  But he still died...

..And there's always a but isn't there?

Apparently dropping this one has ticked some of his bretheren off.  Less than a year later, from what I can tell from description alone, his bigger and far deadlier cousin showed up on the edge of my screen.  I pulled in all my outside dorfs, called up all three of my marksdwarf squads and dorfed the walls.   What happened next suprised me.  I left my gate down to try and draw him into bolt range, he rushes hard to my fortress and as soon as he got close to my marksdwarf range, he shifts into a human, and simply walks away.  Nice feint a**hole.. next time I hope he can try that against the new ballistas going up.

Btw this is my first post ont he forums, been playing df for a couple years now, and I've got to say, this game still impresses me sometimes with some of the things that it pulls. 
« Last Edit: June 28, 2012, 11:09:39 pm by Gears »
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Tolisk

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #8 on: June 28, 2012, 11:25:05 pm »

Demons are a**hats, they don't care what you feel, and will go out of their way to make your day, for good or bad.
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WealthyRadish

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #9 on: June 28, 2012, 11:26:13 pm »

That last one was a werebeast, not a demon. But yeah, expect the humans to be pissed after killing the demon diplomat. It's not necessarily instasiege material, but it is more significant than killing/seizing caravans... if you have a bad history with humans, prepare for a siege.
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terko

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #10 on: June 29, 2012, 12:21:21 am »

Killing is SOOO Elvish! Wall it in and forget about. Most secure and safe way.
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WealthyRadish

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #11 on: June 29, 2012, 12:24:12 am »

Killing is SOOO Elvish! Wall it in and forget about. Most secure and safe way.

I... I don't even... where to start...
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misko27

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #12 on: June 29, 2012, 12:25:36 am »

Killing is SOOO Elvish! Wall it in and forget about. Most secure and safe way.
!?!?!?!?!
if you have a bad history with humans, prepare for a siege.
I have a bad history eith humans, always so obsessed about me not killing their cats and preventing them from idling to prevent tantrum spiral. They also dont like my idea of science...
It's not a deity, it's a demon that fooled the humans.  Dwarves aren't so gullible, put a steel high boot up its ass.
Well...
Goblins are obvious, worshipers of anything that can kick their hairy green asses, except dwarves.
Elves worrship "forces", i.e. the force of a forest, the force of the neatby lake, and its pretty obvious that the demons ain't forest spirits.
Humasn worship Pantheons of Gods, like the ancient greece and romans, which make it fairly likely that a single god could come down.
Dwarves are Dwarves.

Anyway, I reccomend lookong into legends on him. You'll see "in a time before time, XXX Demon wandered the underworld", "in 1, XXX Demon escaped" "in late 1, XXX Demon settled in HumanBurg." "In 2, XXX Demon fooled the nation of "Gullible-istan" into thinking he was "God of Fire, gas breath, the underworld, and oceans." Then You'll see about 5 thousand bools written by them, gennerally about their demon selves, their sphere, their journey to humanburg, etc.. Its actually quite interesting, I saw a Demon, associated with lakes and oceans, Write books along the lines of "The truth about oceans". I imagine that makes him Al Gore, but with Deadly Blood and horns.
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ledgekindred

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #13 on: June 29, 2012, 09:44:13 am »

That last one was a werebeast, not a demon. But yeah, expect the humans to be pissed after killing the demon diplomat. It's not necessarily instasiege material, but it is more significant than killing/seizing caravans... if you have a bad history with humans, prepare for a siege.

I've found that killing a human diplomat is pretty much grounds for siege.  You can harass their caravans and annoy the merchants quite a bit before they get all pissy, but killing a diplomat has always resulted in sieges for me.

Fortunately, humans are pretty bad at sieging.  Or maybe pretty good, depending on how you want to look at it.  They camp out on the edge of your map and don't do much until you get annoyed and attack them.  Or tunnel the ground out under their camp and collapse it out from under them.  Heh heh heh.

Sooooo much war polar bear meat....
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I don't understand, though that is about right with anything DF related.
I just hope he dies the same death that all dwarfs deserve: liver disease.
The legend of Reg: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=65866.0
Atir Stigildegel, Legless Hero of Diamondrelic: http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=83136.0

Gears

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Re: New Human Diplomat is a WHAT?!
« Reply #14 on: June 29, 2012, 10:21:37 am »

Well I'm kinda hoping for a seige of some sort.  The goblins have proved to be a little weak in that department at this fort, I've had one small seige of theirs and it was put down before they ever made it to the walls. The biggest challange i've had so far is from the fire breathing jade dragon, and fire breathing sand titan, they made it through my first line before my marksdwarves could put them down.  I do hope the humans throw a seige at me, I could use a good challange and the free stuff they wear :)

And killing stuff isn't dorf, killing stuff by grabbing them by their small toe and beating them with it is.   
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