Turn 7
Flintus10 and of course IronyOwl still have unused God actions. Anyway, y'know what's funny, I think this is as far in turns as the last Hardcore RTD got, even though it's a couple pages shorter. Anyway, you guys should feel free to come up with some more creative actions than "I hit someone". You're welcome to make an agenda for yourself. And, if you're wondering IronyOwl, it is indeed acceptable to fuck with the ascension rules. For example in the last game it got bumped up to four turns to ascend, but with a bonus of one turn's worth for killing player characters. Setting changes, even large ones, are an option too. No matter who you are or what you're doing: Be creative!
anailater - Johnny Momma: Welcome to the savanna! In celebration of your arrival, you promptly whip out your piece and SHOOT A RANDOM DUDE. (5) You aim for some kind of giant rabbit (as a child you had a pathological fear of rabbits) but it ducks wildly and it looks like your shot hit some random dude instead. Which is a pity, because it looked like he was trying to kill the rabbit too. Not that you feel remorse or anything.
BunnyBob77 - BunnyBob: Now that you're a cult leader, it's time to take divine matters into your hands. Your first action, you tell your congregation, will be to destroy to horrid slime that comes from above! (6) You direct your cult in a nonsense ritual, allegedly to destroy the evil slime. First you tell them to draw five pentagrams on the ground in blood, just to stall for time. Unfortunately they complete this task far quicker than you anticipated, so you write a bunch of nonsense all down on a paper -taking care to be sure that it's unpronounceable- and tell them to chat it in unison. While they're rehearsing, you see a man point a gun at you! (4) You duck out of the way just before he fires! Before you can recover from the commotion, you are horrified to hear, chanted in unison by assorted members of the animal kingdom, all of the eldritch, vowel-free nonsense you wrote down earlier. You begin to rise into the sky (much to your surprise, you thought you were a sham). You are become BunnyBob, Maker of Truth from Lies.
Remalle - Gimli, Son of Groin: In your brief time in the field, you've noticed a lot of strange things- people around are accomplishing amazing tasks, and then disappearing. There is something about this place, you think. After some accomplishments of your own, you're starting to feel it. Tingly, almost. And distant, like you're watching from somewhere else. You know what's happening: These people are becoming gods. (4) You realize you are, and were always meant to be Gimli, Son of Groin, Saint of Dwarven Heritage. Something is doing this, you think in your last mortal moments. Something, your dwarven senses tell you, and it's... but wait, now you're a god. You have more important matters to attend.
Nicholas 1024 - Joshua: Without context, you draw your sword! You wildly charge upon a rabbit-looking sort of fellow in a challenge of strength (1+1) but you swing the sword past him and STAB YOURSELF IN THE LEG. Suddenly, someone SHOOTS YOU. Cursing you the unfair combination of dice rolls and coin flips that led you here, you almost die... but not quite. To add insult to injury, some animals have been drawing pentagrams in your blood. You gather yourself and pick up your sword.
Spinal_Taper - BonnieClyde: You, a hideous two-faced freak of science, sit at a little wooden stand with hot, fresh apple pie. "Freeeeeesh apple pie! Apple pie, anyone?" You're sure that your apple pie stand will be a great icebreaker to talk to citizens about undead mutant rights. However, time ticks on, and nobody shows. Your apple pies are still resting on the stand, in the sun. You touch one to see if it's still hot. (1) If anything, they've been getting hotter. Your right hand (the Clyde one) is HORRIBLY BURNED and you get a -1 to your next roll. It's a sad day for mutant pride.
EveryZig - Greyblade: (5+1) A person picks you up with no suspicion. You will succeed in making an action through this person next turn. Details regarding your circumstances remain undisclosed.
Scottsman - WarglGarbl: (4) Per normal operation of your bizarre physiology, you grow some more faces, among the many limbs, tentacles and other appendages that are continually fading into existence, then losing coherence and becoming something else. So basically, business as usual. Then you get hit with LASERS FROM THE SKY, sustaining further damage to your amorphous self. Fortunately you haven't got vital organs (well, okay, he did get ONE brain...), but you spit out some useless burnt matter. You've barely got enough appendages to keep track of all of your tax forms!
DinosaurusRex_x - Starfox: You are currently piloting your Arwing over an unexplored planet. There's a lot of questions that could could ask, but you like shooting better. You dive down and make a strafing run on some kind of horrible flesh monster. (5)vs(4) A few lasers hit it, but it doesn't die. Apparently it can resist a lot of damage. You have to pull out of your dive before you can get any more shots in, lest you risk hitting the ground.
Noodlerex - Hans Handerson: (4+1) You set your legs a-dancing, and dance they do. You dance impressively, even while trying not to trip on your impractical hammer pants. Speaking of hammers, somebody yells "YOU ARE BANNED!" and tries to hit you with one. (5+1)vs(5+1) You dance out of the way with expert timing, and tauntingly invite another blow with a smug "Can't touch this!" You find yourself wondering why you were never this good in the ol' traveling circus. Huge hammers are a motivator, you suppose. Here, you're in your element.
Spectr - Ted: Still burning with ignominy from losing your Neopets moderator status, you take up a huge sledgehammer with "BAN" written on it and go on a homicidal rampage. You start off by yelling your credo and swinging your hammer at an out-of-work acrobat. (5+1)vs(5+1) She dodges you flawlessly, swing and counter swing, though your attack could hardly be more accurate. This can only mean one thing: Deadly dance-off.
Whew! Finally got that all out of the way. I'm really not sure about removing instant death on 1's, but I guess I can make up for it with enough player interference. Sorry for the delay. I had a party on Saturday, and then on Sunday... well, I was just lazy.