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Author Topic: You Are A Museum Goer  (Read 1469 times)

lawastooshort

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You Are A Museum Goer
« on: June 12, 2012, 04:23:35 pm »
You Are A Museum Goer

You're at the Museum d'Art, in Austria, on the one day when you don't have any sessions to attend at the Oncology conference you are presenting at. It's your first proper abstract and everything - that tiny conference in Boston didn't really count. Anyway, you buy your ticket and enter the entrance gallery. You've been advised to check out the Van Gogh collection, but for some reason you quite fancy looking at the authentic Roman statues in 3B on the second floor.

What do you do?

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« Last Edit: June 13, 2012, 06:40:00 am by lawastooshort »
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Spinal_Taper

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #1 on: June 12, 2012, 04:26:12 pm »
Pull our trenchcoats collar and prepare your revolver. You didn't know where he was, but you could bet Baron VonSpiegel knew where you were.
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Digital Hellhound

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #2 on: June 12, 2012, 04:28:28 pm »
Check out the looted Egyptian artwork in the chamber behind you. There's cool stuff there.
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Quote from: Owlbread on August 07, 2015, 04:37:59 pm
Russia is simply taking an anti-Fascist stance against European Nazi products, they should be applauded. ¡No parmesan!

Hubris Incalculable

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #3 on: June 12, 2012, 04:31:41 pm »
Hey, i was thinking the same thing, but was about to decide against posting it. But now i've changed my mind. Egyptian stuff it is!

Great minds and all that.
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lawastooshort

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #4 on: June 12, 2012, 04:33:02 pm »
You pull your trench coat’s collar up and fumble in your pocket to prepare your revolver for action in case any Barons have followed you in. You head towards the chamber behind you to check out the cool looted Egyptian stuff but after a couple of minutes realise you are lost. You ask one of the stewards where the mummies are and he points you in the right direction in perfect English.

A hundred yards later and you notice you have absent-mindedly made your way to the second floor. It sure seems easy to get lost in the Kunsthistorieschescech Museuschmesch!

It seems that there are Authentic Roman Statues up here, and also a display of ancient Persian cotton reels.

Where do you go?

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Digital Hellhound

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #5 on: June 12, 2012, 04:34:46 pm »
Go see the great ceiling-painting thingy by Gustav Klimt, that guy sure could paint.
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Quote from: Owlbread on August 07, 2015, 04:37:59 pm
Russia is simply taking an anti-Fascist stance against European Nazi products, they should be applauded. ¡No parmesan!

LordSlowpoke

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #6 on: June 12, 2012, 04:37:31 pm »
We will go straight to the display of authentic Greek busts. That's 14D, fifth floor. Cross the roof if you have to.
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Spinal_Taper

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #7 on: June 12, 2012, 04:37:38 pm »
Don't let your guard down. Check if the statues are real, by examining them closely.
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lawastooshort

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #8 on: June 12, 2012, 04:42:44 pm »
You look straight up to see if you can see the awesome ceiling painting by Klimt – you've been told he sure could totally paint. You just see a bunch of light fittings though. Perhaps it's in another room?

Maybe you should just browse the authentic Greek busts instead, you heard there was one of Alala, although he sounds frankly rather French more than Greek. You go straight to the lift a few feet away and press the button.

But then you feel strangely drawn to the Authentic Roman Statues back in the room next to the elevator, and stride purposefully in, totally forgetting the summoned lift. One by one you start examining the statues closely.

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Digital Hellhound

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2012, 04:44:00 pm »
You've heard good things about Caligula. You should keep your eye on him. Very attentively.
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Quote from: Owlbread on August 07, 2015, 04:37:59 pm
Russia is simply taking an anti-Fascist stance against European Nazi products, they should be applauded. ¡No parmesan!

Spinal_Taper

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #10 on: June 12, 2012, 04:45:45 pm »
Do you spy a sinister European mustache?
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lawastooshort

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #11 on: June 12, 2012, 04:51:00 pm »
You look very closely at each of the Authentic Roman Statues, leaning in and peering for a good check to see if any of them sport anachronistic European moustaches – you specialise in Oncology, but you understand that most ancient Romans didn't have European style moustaches until about 300AD. You think you spy a statue that looks a little like Caligula, or at least what you pictured him to look like, but then suddenly notice a particularly appealing statue standing proud and tall in the centre of the room. You find yourself drawn towards him - for it is indeed a him.

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Hubris Incalculable

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #12 on: June 12, 2012, 04:53:42 pm »
Press hard on Caligula's left nipple to expose a secret passage.
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lawastooshort

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #13 on: June 12, 2012, 04:57:32 pm »
Ah man, who cares about stunningly charismatic and sensual statues when Caligula's left nipple is there for the tweaking?! You take your leave of the phenomenal presence calling to you and walk back over to Caligula. He could probably show you how to use his secret passage or something!

But after only a few steps you find yourself unable to resist. You turn round and head back to the big statue in the middle. You can't quite put your finger on what's so special about it.

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Hubris Incalculable

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Re: You Are A Museum Goer
« Reply #14 on: June 12, 2012, 05:00:21 pm »
Oh, stop railroading us.
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