BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE GUINEA PIG VILLAGE: A MARTIAL ARTS COMEDY
In the spring of 1943 your seven brave guinea pigs venture north across the southern Russian plains. Your destination: the battle-decimated ruins of Speedograd, deserted scene of months of bitter and horrific fighting between Nazi and Communist forces. Your goal: to colonise the bricks and rubble and to establish a settlement able to capitalise on the vast quantity of used and ruined Speedos that litter the battered buildings and so send a regular harvest back to the Plainhome, the vast and verdant land from which you travel in search of glory and riches.
For lo! Speedos are the raw material that fuels the experimentation of guinea pigs into the manipulation of reality; they are the raw material of Speedomancy, once a dark and forbidden art, but one now accepted for the greater good a vital way for guinea pigs to survive in this new, dangerous and brutal world.
Speedomancy could well be the only way for the Plainhome to survive against the rising threat from the east.
For days you journey across the savage plains of the steppe. You brave snowstorms and thunderstorms; you fend off the attentions of herds of wild eagles and the blind rampages of angry buffalo. You catch fleeting glimpses of distant wonders, of giraffe, emu, wilderbeast; animals some of you have never even heard of outside of old folk tales, as alien to your existence as the bogeymen and goblins used to scare guinea pig infants. The seven of you cross the wind-swept high mountains near what the humans used to call Guliaipol, pass through the swamps of the Dnieper Basin, cross the sun-baked Nogais Steppe, until finally, one day, you see the smoking spires of ruined Speedograd in the distance.
You spend the next day marching north in high spirits; surely, glory is at hand!
You are confident that you will have a great harvest of Speedos ready even for the first Merchant when he arrives in July; you are confident that your names will pass into guinea pig folklore as the saviours of the Plainhome!
The brave band of seven approach the outskirts of the deserted city as night falls, and you circle together round your straw wagon to sleep.
Tomorrow, you take Speedograd!
The next day, the sun rises, gently heating your collective fur. Your eyes take in the majesty of the destroyed brickwork all around you: part is disheartened by the evidence of wanton destruction; part is warmed by the thought that building materials will be readily available. You check your small wagon of straw and head into town, looking for somewhere suitable to found your village. The tasty gleam of spandex, nylon and polyester glints from all about the ruins in the morning sunlight.
Will you approach from the east or the west of the Volga?
Choose a location to found your village and a starting action for Week1!
You may pick one of the below to be your Guinea Pig. Other breed suggestions will be considered. Breed of Guinea Pig effects only appearance. I recommend the
wiki page for further details:
Short-hairedAbyssinianHimalayanPeruvianYou may pick one of the below as the starting skill for you Guinea Pig. Other skill suggestions will be considered.
Martial ArtsHuntingGatheringSpeedo-GatheringMasonSongSpeedomancySurgeonExtra-cuteJudgeThis is a prototype rule for how your guinea pig can learn new skills. It is a prototype because if it requires too much bookkeeping I will drop it for something simpler.
Your guinea pig can learn a new skill by studying. This will take at least three weeks of non-continuous study. After three weeks, I will roll to see if you have succeeded; I won't tell you the result of this, but I will tell you how many practices of the action you will have to do before you have mastered the skill. On average you should have learnt it after four weeks of study and two practices.
So, for example, Johnny Guinea Pig wants to learn Speedomancy. He studies for three weeks and decides he's awesome at it. He doesn't know that he's not, because he rolled bad, and goes to practice. But bam! He fails, and becomes known as Three Legged Johnny.
Incidentally when I was younger I had a three legged gerbil but I'll save that story that for another time and/or forum game.
For another example, Bertrand Guinea Pig wants to learn Judging. He studies for four weeks and realises he's awesome at it. Amazingly enough, he is, because he rolled okay, and he goes to practice judging. He doesn't quite get his first judgement right, but he seems competent enough, so he doesn't end up with a life threatening injury or anything. He goes for another practice (again, without the +1 bonus if the skill gives it when learnt) and bam! He does an awesome judgement, and realises he has mastered the art of judgery! He has learnt Judging.
If this is as stupid or complicated as it seems now I've written it down, well, please don't hesitate to ask for clarification. I might just change it if I don't like it, but I like the potential for suffering life threatening injury that it provides.
Guinea Pigs have 5 hit points each. When the colony has insufficient food, one random Guinea Pig will lose one hit point of starvation damage per turn. Reaching zero hit points will result in death. Each Guinea Pig will require one unit of food per week. The starting Guinea Pigs will bring 200 units of Straw with them in a small cart.
Map of Speedograd as estimated by the Plainhomes cartographers is included below.
Most rolls will be simple d6 rolls with failures and successes similar to RtD rules.
Role play and descriptive actions will be rewarded with bonuses and a higher likelihood of success.
Main turns will represent roughly a week of real time, but smaller actions and interactions can take place in mini-turns within the turns. If they are only between guinea pigs then no GM interference will be required.
The goal of the game is to build and simulate a guinea pig village, and to successfully meet the demands of the Plainhome for harvested Speedos.
Oh, and please bold your actions and italicise your speech! You can even colour it or them if you want.
Name:
Breed:
Skill:
Provide further biographical or descriptive details if you wish. If you have a thumbnail of a guinea pig that would be a bonus.
This is not like my previous games, which were light-hearted RtDs. This will be more like a village building game, and thus slightly experimental and, of course, darker in tone. I cant guarantee it will work or last as well as my RtDs have done so far, but I will try.
ONLY SIX GUINEA PIGS AT A TIME PLEASE!
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Topic: Big Trouble in Little Guinea Pig Village: Closed. (Read 16369 times)