Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Hanslanda]

Can he mod in Thu'um?  I'd bake him cookies, but they'd go stale in the mail...

[Putnam]

I know I could, so he probably could too

[Hanslanda]

So... Two batches of cookies, and half a cake each.

[Corai]

I will give you internet socks, make of adamanite, stuffed with other sockes, with a adorable kobold delivery boy. Who you can then kill for the liquid cute you can sell to Wierd for a hefty amount of money.


/references

[Kofthefens]

I understand! I feel smug and self-satisfied now.

[misko27]

Okay wait, I got it,

Vezuvelas. Invaders, (or random creatures, whatever), armed with the Vezuvela. Obviously extreme bad thought and likely insanity, and to spite the player, a vezuvela rings in the music until destroyed.
Beat that

[MaximumZero]

I hear it! The bvvvvzzvzvzvvzvzvzvv of the vuvuzela! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

[SixOfSpades]

Invaders, (or random creatures, whatever), armed with the Vezuvela. Obviously extreme bad thought and likely insanity.

Dwarves are already insane. So a vuvuzela siege would simply make them more insane, just to the point where they're too insane to bathe.

New bad suggestions:

In Adventure mode, you should be able to increase your odds of finding good loot by going to temples and correctly answering trivia questions about the Kardashians, Justin Beiber, and the Jersey Shore.

To make the game profitable, Toady should engage in some lucrative product placement. The text string "dwarven beer" is replaced with "Michelob," low boots are now Nikes, minecarts become Volvos, dwarven syrup is turned into Marmite, and the RNG keeps naming your military squads after professional sports teams.

Whenever a married couple are sharing a bed, the game automatically pauses and zooms the camera there.

And one good suggestion:

Every time you save your game, the "Cleaning game objects . . . " screen actually cleans up all those dozens of blood spatters left all over the place from when the humans shot a single black bear outside your fortress five years ago.

[misko27]

I've never seen married couples share a bed actually, not even sure they do that. Besides, dwarves reproduce by spores anyway.

[Niyazov]

crows and ravens spawn in more realistic-sized flocks

[Agent_Irons]

Oh man. Delicious! My marksdwarves train mostly on flying things near my fortress.

[Hanslanda]

Don't tell Loud Whispers, he will have a field day with that many ravens.

[The Bard]

- all constructions require yearly maintenance. This includes each and every section of wall.

- Dwarven Home Owner's Association sends liaisons limiting the color of the stone you're allowed to use on above ground constructions, complaining about the blood all over the surface and demanding trade goods for this.

- Dwarven children must be taught in school or they'll grow up unable to be assigned labors.

- Freeloaders arrive in migrant waves like vampires. They do even less than children, eat and drink twice as much, pull levers at random, make mandates and have good enough AI to avoid unfortunate accidents.

- crippling phobias implemented. "Urist McDorfy cancels Pull Cinnabar Lever, afraid of cinnabar." "He has been terrified by a statue of a bat recently." "He fears sparrows, lignite, magma and dwarves for their beards."

[MaximumZero]

Don't tell Loud Whispers, he will have a field day with that many ravens.

I'll remember to keep my daughter within arm's length.

[Garath]

occupational accidents: woodcutters having trees fall on them or chopping into their leg, furnace operators and smiths etc recieving severe burns

farmers need sickles and scythes, farm plots need to be plowed after each harvest.

volcanic eruption pushing magma out of your magma furnace/smelter/kiln/etc

battlebread, who doesn't want battlebread. And combat muffins.

predator animals make success calculations instead of either running away or charging regardless of numbers (Giant Lion: "RUN, it's a child!")

add friendly fire for marksdwarfs

dwarves create thrash from eating/living, thrashcans are needed plus a group of sweepers/cleaners, since some dwarfs just throw it on the floor, which is now a crime, "littering"

being idle and staying in one spot for too long is a crime, "loitering"

dwarfs demand specific clothing, including gender specific, inversed for dwarves with low authority and/or tradition values

priests & religion, including sacrifices, holy days off, fasting and ridiculous mandates (in hematite thou shall only eat plump helmets, to honor the prophet Urist, who lived in a plump helmet cave when he had his visions), schisms and religious discrimination and war