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It was fun for a long time but towards the end it just started to drag

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Total Members Voted: 28

[Gizogin]

[Ahh, funny accents.  Where would we be without them?
I am more than slightly interested to see how the dwarves see us forumites.  In fact...]

- Food Stockpile #4
The two dwarves were taking a break from their hauling duties to grab a drink or three.  Tekkud, the larger of the two, cracked open a barrel of dwarven rum, and poured them each a mug.  "Ugh, that Sodel," he complained.  "He can't shut up, can he?  Always bragging about his 'military conquests.'  I happen to know he's never even fought off a kobold thief, let alone 'two hydras at once.'"

The smaller dwarf, known as Adil, took a swig of his drink.  "Ah, let him be.  He's not doing any harm, and besides-" he was cut off by the door slamming open.  Standing in the doorway was the G-Body Mk. VI, who marched in, hefted a barrel of raw meat in each arm, and marched back out again, slamming the door behind itself.

Tekkud shuddered.  "Give me the creeps, they do.  They're just unnatural."  He finished his mug of ale and poured himself another.

"You know, that Gizogin fellow made them," Adil responded.  "Well, I say 'made.'  He brought them with him, from wherever those people came from."

"Those people?  The, uh, 'forumites,' or whatever they call themselves?"

"Yeah, them.  Things haven't been the same since they showed up."  Adil fished through a large stone pot, and pulled out a stack of +shad biscuits+.  He took one, and offered the stack to Tekkud.

"No thanks.  Fish don't agree with me.  Anyway, I know what you mean.  Just a few days ago, there was that siege.  Not an ordinary siege, with goblins and archers and whatnot, but with dragons!  Big old panic, sealing off all the entrances, getting everyone to the bunker, the usual.  And, just like that, it's over.  What kind of siege lasts less than three days?  Then, just yesterday, I saw a bunch of guards carrying one of them through on a raft or something, taking it to the hospital.  Thought I'd gone stark raving mad, I did."

Adil finished his biscuit, and washed it down with another swig of rum.  "Yeah, I saw that dragon.  Actually, it's been here a while.  Apparently, it's one of those forumites too.  No idea how that works."

"They're certainly an odd bunch." 

They were both silent for a time.  Finally, Adil spoke up.  "Actually, it's funny you should mention that siege.  I take it you noticed I was absent when everyone went to the bunker?"

"Yeah, actually.  Thought it was a bit odd, but I assumed you'd just been drafted for military service or something."

"Well, not quite.  Gizogin was going around looking for those of us with military experience.  Said he needed some guards for something."

"What's a doctor need with guards?" Tekkud asked.  He'd finished the last rum in the barrel, so he tossed it aside and pulled up one of sunshine.

"Oh, I didn't know we had any of that left.  Anyway, he said he needed us to guard something, something that could never be allowed to escape.  He led me and a bunch of others to where that new dining hall was going to be, and told us to barricade the doors and guard them.  Seemed to think there was something dangerous in there."

"How could there be something dangerous?  It hadn't even been finished yet, and the caverns don't come close to that level."

"I don't know, but that's not even the weirdest part.  He said he had to go run the hospital, so he left Corai in charge."

"Corai?  Don't know that name."

"It's a kobold name.  He put a kobold in charge."

[WillowLuman]

[Since we showed up? We founded this site, and the last one! All those dwarves are our migrants... somehow. A few of them were refugees from the last place I guess. Most are migrants though. I guess we'll ignore how we got 200 from overseas so fast (150 survivors after the cyber incident). I bet they'd still think us a bit odd, though.]

[I'd also like to think that one of us misinformed them that forumite means "die-hard" in our native tounge XD]

[Gizogin]

[Since we showed up? We founded this site, and the last one! All those dwarves are our migrants... somehow. A few of them were refugees from the last place I guess. Most are migrants though. I guess we'll ignore how we got 200 from overseas so fast (150 survivors after the cyber incident). I bet they'd still think us a bit odd, though.]

[I'd also like to think that one of us misinformed them that forumite means "die-hard" in our native tounge XD]

[Right.  I forgot.  I'm just going to say that, when they said "showed up," they meant "showed up in this world."  Our actions have had pretty wide-reaching consequences, and dwarves have long memories.]

[Eric Blank]

[Since we showed up? We founded this site, and the last one! All those dwarves are our migrants... somehow. A few of them were refugees from the last place I guess. Most are migrants though. I guess we'll ignore how we got 200 from overseas so fast (150 survivors after the cyber incident). I bet they'd still think us a bit odd, though.]

[I'd also like to think that one of us misinformed them that forumite means "die-hard" in our native tounge XD]

[Right.  I forgot.  I'm just going to say that, when they said "showed up," they meant "showed up in this world."  Our actions have had pretty wide-reaching consequences, and dwarves have long memories.]

[Indeed. Actually, I was considering explaining how we'd abolished most dwarven traditions of governance in the old fort and this one in favor of a forum or senate - run of course by the "forumites." The dwarves don't know why we're all in these seats of power, or why they're shared with only a select few natives, or why we're so strange, or for the most part that they have a part in the system, but they know that we are the local government and defer only to the king.
This idea sprang up partially because Wierd keeps talking about how I'm in charge of everything, when I'm really not. But having initially lived in a shack outside the main fortress and then in his laboratory, and not initially being of much import to the rest of the community, he wouldn't have ever really gotten up to date on that. Now, though, he's got a seat of his own and is about to earn the dreaded paperwork as a symbol of his authority in his field, as elected by the populace. Have fun with that.

I'm the Head Stoneworker - the position in authority of stone constructions, masonry duties, and subterranean excavations, but nothing else. If I need supplies or extra labor, I have to request them from the other industrial/social heads, including Jerry as the Head Woods(elf), the Head Smith (Up for debate with the smiths now recognizing the Super Smith that appeared out of nowhere and confuses the hell out of them), Chief Medical Dwarf (Gizogin), Head Craftsman(?), Lead Mechanic(?), Lead Researcher/Exotic Materials Production Manager (Wierd, formerly Girlinhat for fear of becoming one with her ‼SCIENCE‼ experiments.), Food Supplier(?), Labor Divisions Manager (Mayor)(?), Record Keeper(?), Captain of the Guard and Militia Commander (Ironblood and Vemini, most likely, and not necessarily in that order.)

No Nobles, the Mayor being responsible for coordination, and all positions electable, chosen by skill or honorable favor in their field, by the population (used to by the forumites as the sole class of citizen with voting rights, but now that almost everyone is dead, it's pretty much been overturned.)

It's broken, convoluted, extremely inefficient, and thus exactly what a bunch of losers from the internet with no relation to one another like us would come up with in order to avoid having to put up with the dwarven government and justice system.

The only people that give us orders, is anyone willing to kick the hornets nest and intimidating enough that we don't try to sting them in the eyes, and the king, so he'll keep sending us cheap labor migrants!]

[wierd]

Clerical work?  Ewwww...

Next up: typewriters, and mimeographs.

[Gizogin]

[As I've said before, the good thing about being the only doctor is that no-one threatens you or denies your requests.  Sure, it can be a very busy and demanding job sometimes, but there's job security you just can't beat.]

[WillowLuman]

[I think it would probably be best that we make our government more organized during the fast-forward. Way I see it, we're just viewed as an eccentric little outpost that gets left to its own devices because the capitol is too nervous to bother us much. The only thing that would draw a lot of attention that we've done so far was leaving a huge crater behind then mysteriously reappearing somewhere else far away several years later. Right now, having been here for so short a time, the recent strange actions haven't had nearly enough time to reach home as news. And as well as being across the ocean from the Mountainhome, the nearest actual civilizations to us on this landmass are separated from us by hundreds of miles of wilderness.

For civic positions: I used to be a head craftsman of small trade goods, but even at the old fort I was out of the job for a while before it exploded (being erased from history and then in a coma). Now I don't have any hands.]

[wierd]

Weird knoced gently on the now slightly charred wooden door leading to the infirmary. G-8 ansered the door with a laconic "symthoms?"

"Headache, fatigue, irritability, severe mood swings, bloating, and constipation." He mocked the robot.

"Sympthoms consistent with dwarven alcohol withdrawl. When did you last consume an alcoholic beverage?"

"I was referring to the sympthoms you robots cause me to have." He snarked. "I need to see doctor gizogin on non-medical related matters."

"Wait here." Said the robot, before returning inside.

He was sorely tempted to reprogram these things to make gizogin's day more interesting. Getting care from them was like getting diagnosed by a telephone answering machine sometimes. He'd have to come up with a more confounding list of sympthoms to overload the G-bodies with. Maybe he should include "unexplained ectopic zoonotic pregnancy" next time? Oh, and gastric parasites. That too. "Alcohol withdrawl" just wasn't edgy enough of a diagnosis.

He stood outside patiently, waiting for the doctor to show up. He was getting tired of lugging around that stupid box...

[Corai]

[Since we showed up? We founded this site, and the last one! All those dwarves are our migrants... somehow. A few of them were refugees from the last place I guess. Most are migrants though. I guess we'll ignore how we got 200 from overseas so fast (150 survivors after the cyber incident). I bet they'd still think us a bit odd, though.]

[I'd also like to think that one of us misinformed them that forumite means "die-hard" in our native tounge XD]

[Right.  I forgot.  I'm just going to say that, when they said "showed up," they meant "showed up in this world."  Our actions have had pretty wide-reaching consequences, and dwarves have long memories.]

[Indeed. Actually, I was considering explaining how we'd abolished most dwarven traditions of governance in the old fort and this one in favor of a forum or senate - run of course by the "forumites." The dwarves don't know why we're all in these seats of power, or why they're shared with only a select few natives, or why we're so strange, or for the most part that they have a part in the system, but they know that we are the local government and defer only to the king.
This idea sprang up partially because Wierd keeps talking about how I'm in charge of everything, when I'm really not. But having initially lived in a shack outside the main fortress and then in his laboratory, and not initially being of much import to the rest of the community, he wouldn't have ever really gotten up to date on that. Now, though, he's got a seat of his own and is about to earn the dreaded paperwork as a symbol of his authority in his field, as elected by the populace. Have fun with that.

I'm the Head Stoneworker - the position in authority of stone constructions, masonry duties, and subterranean excavations, but nothing else. If I need supplies or extra labor, I have to request them from the other industrial/social heads, including Jerry as the Head Woods(elf), the Head Smith (Up for debate with the smiths now recognizing the Super Smith that appeared out of nowhere and confuses the hell out of them), Chief Medical Dwarf (Gizogin), Head Craftsman(?), Lead Mechanic(?), Lead Researcher/Exotic Materials Production Manager (Wierd, formerly Girlinhat for fear of becoming one with her ‼SCIENCE‼ experiments.), Food Supplier(?), Labor Divisions Manager (Mayor)(?), Record Keeper(?), Captain of the Guard and Militia Commander (Ironblood and Vemini, most likely, and not necessarily in that order.)

No Nobles, the Mayor being responsible for coordination, and all positions electable, chosen by skill or honorable favor in their field, by the population (used to by the forumites as the sole class of citizen with voting rights, but now that almost everyone is dead, it's pretty much been overturned.)

It's broken, convoluted, extremely inefficient, and thus exactly what a bunch of losers from the internet with no relation to one another like us would come up with in order to avoid having to put up with the dwarven government and justice system.

The only people that give us orders, is anyone willing to kick the hornets nest and intimidating enough that we don't try to sting them in the eyes, and the king, so he'll keep sending us cheap labor migrants!]

Dwarf 1: What the hell!?!

Dwarf 2: Deal with it, were run by die-hards.

Dwarf 1: And....whats that kobold we-

Dwarf 2: Just ignore it, it eats your soul if you irritate it.


-Edit-

-Whens the timeskip anyway?-


-Edit of Gizogin-

-You left me in charge? I'm miles away in a forest looking for my suit.-

[Gizogin]

[Speaking of the timeskip, when are we planning to do that?  I don't have anything else I want/need to do before it.  The Gizogins can finish the tank up during it.  Also, while we're on the subject, what season is it?]

Gizogin and Gizo X were working on the tank when the Mk. VIII found them.  It was coming along well, but it was by far the largest project they'd attempted, and was taking a long time.  The Mk. VIII spoke, in a booming monotone: "MR. WIERD IS HERE TO SEE YOU, DOCTOR."

Both Gizogins looked up from their work.  Gizo X opened his mouth to speak, but Gizogin cut him off.  "I'll get this.  You work faster anyway."  He wiped his hands on his work overalls, and walked over to the door, where the Mk. VIII was still standing, expectantly.  "Thank you, VIII.  That will be all."  The automaton bowed and stood aside.  Gizogin stepped out of his workshop, and looked around.  Not seeing wierd, he sighed, and made his way across the hospital floor to the main entrance on the opposite side.  He opened the door, and sure enough, wierd was standing there.  "VIII made you wait outside, didn't he?" he said, in greeting.  "Sorry about that.  What can I help you with?"

[EDIT: to Corai:  Back when I sealed off the dining hall, I'm pretty sure I put you in charge of the team to barricade and guard the doors, at least for a while.  The dwarves are talking about it now, well after the fact.  I guess they decided the dining hall didn't need guarding anymore, since it is completely sealed.]

[wierd]

"Don't worry about it.. I've been treated worse." He assured. "I'm sorry to bother you like this, but I was told that you were pretty much the only mechanic capable of making the tiny parts needed to put a lock on this box. Eric and Ollioli aren't in there are they?"

[Corai]

-Anyone remember the island near us? The one that is FILLED to the brim with more people like Thari? Am I the only one that remembers?-

[Gizogin]

"Well, Eric left a couple hours ago, but Oliolli's here.  He might be asleep though.  A lock, you say?  I think I can manage that.  Openable only by you, and unpickable to boot..."  He trailed off.  He did some quick thinking, running through possible designs.  "Did you want to come in?  It won't take too long, and you can tell me more about what you want it to do, but if you have somewhere you need to be, I can always send for you once it's done."

[wierd]

We can deal with the kamikaze ninja assasins after the time skip. I doubt the honorable master of hus masochist dojo is quite that masochistic to attempt a blind invasion, given that his spies have all died.. like usual.

---

"If eric's not in there, sure. I could use a spot to sit down."

The two entered the hospital waiting room, where gizogin offered a wooden stool. Weird gladly sat down. The furnace room was not a good place to be wearing black rubber. Maybe he should follow 8's medical advice about booze once his errands were over. He was really wanting to get things more secure, so he could study X's research and plans more closely. Like always, life was interveining with vengence. He could clearly relate to why most necromancers killed the living on sight when they got old enough.

"What exactly were you wanting in a lock?" Asked gizogin.

"Something I can lock, and not worry about people getting into afterwards. I've noticed stuff missing from my shelves again ever since corai stopped in yesterday. I want something even a kobold can't open." He lied. He had been contemplating his cover story on the way up from the furnaces, and it was golden.

"That's a tough order.." the doctor mused "but I think I have something that might work. Came up with it when my plans kept turning up missing in the old fortress. Its real nasty if you try to force the lock."

"Perfect!" Grinned weird. Hre really did hope eric was dumb enough to try something like that. If gizogin said it was nasty, you could be assured that it certainly was.

[Gizogin]

"Right then.  I'll have it ready in just a moment."  Gizogin took wierd's box and returned to the workshop.  He set it down on a workbench, one of several in the room, and walked over to the large metal filing cabinet where he kept all his old blueprints. 

"What'd wierd want?" asked Gizo X, who was busy fastening a large metal plate to the tank's skeleton.

"He wants a lock for a strongbox.  I figured I'd give him the 6-B.  He'll enjoy that."

"Excellent choice.  Let me know if you need a hand."

"No, no, don't trouble yourself.  It won't take long."  Gizogin flipped through the folders in the cabinet, until he found what he was looking for.  An old set of blueprints, marked in bold letters: "TRAPPED LOCK: DESIGN 6-B."  He took it over to the workbench and got right to business.


Wierd hadn't been waiting for more than an hour when Gizogin returned with his box.  "Is it done?" he asked.

"Oh, it's done.  You'll like this, I think."  Gizogin talked wierd through the lock's features.  On the face of it, it looked like an ordinary lock, with an ordinary key, but there was much more to it than that.  The key was unique, and of a special construction that only Gizogin knew.  It contained many hidden features, all of which the lock required in order to open.  Any attempt to duplicate the key would fail, and the lock would violently reject it.  Nor could the key be stolen; it subtly changed shape according to whoever held it, so only wierd could use it to open the lock.  Any attempt to force the lock would either destroy the contents of the safe or cause it to unleash a number of deadly traps on whoever was trying to break in, depending on what wierd set it to.  Something similar would happen if anyone tried to simply break through the box itself.

Once the key had been accepted and the door opened, the user of the safe had three minutes to access its contents and re-lock it before it would unleash its arsenal of traps.  "So, if you're forced at weaponpoint to open the safe, just open it and wait," concluded Gizogin.  "They won't know what hit them.  Just make sure you're not directly in front of it.  Or directly behind it.  Or in the same room."