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Author Topic: Xuspgas troll clothier  (Read 3512 times)

vicwarrior

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Xuspgas troll clothier
« on: May 12, 2012, 03:21:41 pm »



Is this a bug or something? Or trolls are supposed to have profesions?

Edit: shortly after a troll weaponsmith came.




I feel that they are trolling me.
« Last Edit: May 12, 2012, 03:26:01 pm by vicwarrior »
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SirAaronIII

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2012, 03:35:12 pm »

Of course they're trolling you, it's what they do.

But seriously, yes, trolls have [CAN_LEARN], so they'll have skills when they come to attack you.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #2 on: May 12, 2012, 03:37:23 pm »

No no no no, for you see, clothiers are in fact the term for troll warriors who club their enemies to death with socks. It's a goblin thing, you probably wouldn't understand.

vicwarrior

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #3 on: May 12, 2012, 03:45:41 pm »

Ironically the clothier  had troll fur clothes on it looks like he made himself his own clothes.
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Monk321654

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #4 on: May 12, 2012, 04:24:22 pm »

Ironically the clothier  had troll fur clothes on it looks like he made himself his own clothes.
If you had wool thick enough to make into a shirt, wouldn't you?
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

I'm not your average Bay12er. I care about my drunken midgets.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #5 on: May 12, 2012, 04:34:59 pm »

Wearing wool over your wool, this troll is a true fashion minded individual. Let him live.
Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #6 on: May 12, 2012, 05:14:03 pm »

Of course they're trolling you, it's what they do.

But seriously, yes, trolls have [CAN_LEARN], so they'll have skills when they come to attack you.

Xugstass - Legendary Conversationalist

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GreatWyrmGold

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #7 on: May 12, 2012, 08:00:25 pm »

Ironically the clothier  had troll fur clothes on it looks like he made himself his own clothes.

What's more, they're made out of some troll's fur. I can imagine an underground troll clothier; poor, downtrodden trolls sell their fur to the clothier, despite knowing that they will be beaten by their goblin masters, in exchange for a few coins with which to pay for their vice of choice, or maybe to save up for something better. The fur is then woven into cloth, and the cloth transformed into wonderful garments and such before being sold to goblins or well-off/frugal trolls. There is also a side business in leather garments from customers who didn't pay their debts...
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Girlinhat

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #8 on: May 12, 2012, 08:12:35 pm »

A bolt flew.  A zip in the wind before a sickening soft slick and it lodged firmly in the goblin's chest.  The gaunt green figure clutched his chest, scratching at his breastplate as his breath came ragged and he fell on the ground, ignored by the other dozen goblins who were limping or crawling away, and another dozen that lay dead just a few feet before.  Well, dead or dying.  Axelords moved through the field, almost leisurely.  As bolt zipped and slashed through the air, axes fell on the wounded and snuffed out the fragile life of another greenskin.

Another squad moved forward, whips brushing the bloodsoaked grass as they dangled just inches above the soil, or else twirled overhead slowly before making infrequent cracks in the air.  With a wave and a crack the whips rendered the air asunder, popping against armor and sending the axelords to the ground in pain.  The best of dwarven might was an even match against the most immoral of goblin weapons.  Spears arose.  A hail of bolts and a flurry of shield and speartip.  Lashes rent the air and spears sliced through iron and flesh.

Cries tore through the field.  Screams in the blazing heat of the shrubland as troll feet and fists pounded the earth raw, crushing grass and sending measly war dogs flying.  Bolts lodged, harmless, impaling the heavy troll frames with flimsy splinters of metal under the leathery hide.  Whips cracked, not against dwarven steel but against raw flesh, driving the trolls onwards in a rage.  Thick, meaty fingers grabbed arms and whole torsos, crunching armor and swatting blades aside with all the unbridled rage and uncaring of personal injury that an enslaved troll could maintain.

"Xuspgas... not want fight." The voice was gravely and broken, rendered garbled by a mouthful of tusks and a neck built more like a stone wall than a body part.

"Oh bloody..." The dwarf shuddered as his axe came down into a goblin's head, "Ah keep fergtin' yer type ken talk."

"Xuspgas not care." The troll muttered as he trudged forward on bruised feet and broken knuckles, "Xuspgas not want dwarf.  Xuspgas not want fight, Xuspgas only want cloth!"

The dwarf moved around the troll quickly, bringing the axe down into another goblin as the greenskin clawed at the bolt lodged in its stomach, "Tailor eh?  Troll tailor, was'e world comin to now?  Aint never heard o trolls and clothes anyways."

The troll growled out, slamming his hand into the corpse of the goblin and forcing the lodged bolt into his own wrist, ignoring the flimsy ammo as he threw the corpse halfway across the field, "Xuspgas make good cloth!  Xupsgas use own hair, make glove!  Good glove!  Xuspgas only want make cloth!"

The dwarf sighed, reaching up to pull his helmet down before raising his axe and facing the troll, "Yeh, and ah came here with a decade o experience and a 'ole family of making tha best damn cheese ye ever put lips on.  What I get?  An axe and a helmet and a new career.  Now quite yer blubberin and come on then!"

Monk321654

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #9 on: May 12, 2012, 08:24:16 pm »

Damn, that's sweet.
You are a great Novelist, Girl.
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This is a side-effect of dwarven animal training (hit animal with hammer until it forgets that it hates you, then lovingly cuddle it).

I'm not your average Bay12er. I care about my drunken midgets.

Loud Whispers

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #10 on: May 12, 2012, 08:30:11 pm »

Just give 'im the damn cloth :|

vicwarrior

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2012, 02:58:26 am »

too bad i killed them all...and the human siege that came 10 dwarf days after that whitout casualties.
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Sabreur

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #12 on: May 13, 2012, 02:36:13 pm »

too bad i killed them all...and the human siege that came 10 dwarf days after that whitout casualties.

Aww.  And here I was imagining a happy ending with Xuspgas and a cheesemaker-turned-weaver working together in the depths of the fortress to turn out piles of *Rope Reed Socks*.

Garath

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #13 on: May 14, 2012, 04:45:21 am »

troll siege engineer... Well, it makes sense to bring one if you're attacking a fort
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vicwarrior

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Re: Xuspgas troll clothier
« Reply #14 on: May 14, 2012, 05:01:32 am »

Just saw in the deaths list the was also a troll pump operator gosh.
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