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Author Topic: Urist.... mind at least planting something?  (Read 3098 times)

ClkWrkJester

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Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« on: May 11, 2012, 10:32:53 pm »

I just need to share what is possibly the worst embark group ever.  The site itself is beautiful and free of hostiles. A river, sand everywhere, even surface metals.  Its a desert so trees and plants are scarce but we're making due.
The trouble?

Ooooh the trouble.

My dwarves. My original seven have shown me why they got sent to start a fort in a desert.  they are the laziest pieces of beard I have ever seen in this game.  They have spent so much time eating, drinking, sleeping, and on break that they haven't even gotten around to building the farm plots, butchering the animals, or fishing.  They've nearly devoured all of our food and drink stores.

I honestly just watched the dedicated farmer eat. Drink. Take a nap. Wake up. Drink. Eat. Go on break. fall asleep.

So you know what? Screw 'em. They'll leave good equipment for the reclaim, the lazy so and sos.
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Carve out a massive pit and construct a copper block tower! Challenge those goblin bastards with your phallus of justice!

Corai

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #1 on: May 11, 2012, 10:38:00 pm »

There dwarves, its there nature.
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ClkWrkJester

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #2 on: May 11, 2012, 10:41:35 pm »

Its amazing. I have over 15 dwarves, and they've all turned into indolent snots, drinking the last of the beer and eating the last of the food while the farms stand unbuilt.  This is a monument to dorfish stupidity.
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Carve out a massive pit and construct a copper block tower! Challenge those goblin bastards with your phallus of justice!

NW_Kohaku

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #3 on: May 11, 2012, 10:43:36 pm »

What are their personalities?  It impacts how often they go on break, so if you get personality traits like "lives life at a leisurely pace", they'll go on break more often. 
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Personally, I like [DF] because after climbing the damned learning cliff, I'm too elitist to consider not liking it.
"And no Frankenstein-esque body part stitching?"
"Not yet"

Improved Farming
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crazysheep

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #4 on: May 11, 2012, 10:45:10 pm »

Do any of them have the Farming (Fields) labour active?
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

ClkWrkJester

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #5 on: May 11, 2012, 10:57:36 pm »

Yes, they do. They're all just... relaxing dwarves. I finally got a migrant wave who showed up, went "The hell?!" and just set to work. Its hilarious, these 5 migrants have gotten everything built while my original set just sit and relax.

They're going to all have accidents soon, or become part of a cave exploration team, I think.
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Carve out a massive pit and construct a copper block tower! Challenge those goblin bastards with your phallus of justice!

crazysheep

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #6 on: May 11, 2012, 11:00:51 pm »

Lol.

Also, I just had a thought. Forbid all the food in the fortress except seeds, and see what happens :P
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

Morpha

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #7 on: May 11, 2012, 11:08:42 pm »

Do that and Urist McSober will throw a seed through the head of Urist McHardworking.
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Quote from: Gerottomo on May 03, 2012, 04:34:11 pm
That should be a new type of project, making a rug design in dwarf fortress (With accurate coloring)
"And so, after many deaths and much sacrifice, someone turned their fortress into a fully functioning self aware carpet that actively sought after sources of fresh blood."

The Giant Bat who decided an axe made a better weapon than claws:
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=108229.30

crazysheep

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #8 on: May 11, 2012, 11:11:42 pm »

Do that and Urist McSober will throw a seed through the head of Urist McHardworking.
Lulz. I forgot to add a line saying "and when the farm plots get built unforbid all the food and drink".
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"Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, for there's nothing a kid can't do."

NW_Kohaku

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #9 on: May 11, 2012, 11:18:59 pm »

They'll hunt for vermin to eat instead of eating regular food. 

Maybe you should post a save with a bug report unless you can see something odd about their personalities? 
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Personally, I like [DF] because after climbing the damned learning cliff, I'm too elitist to consider not liking it.
"And no Frankenstein-esque body part stitching?"
"Not yet"

Improved Farming
Class Warfare

ClkWrkJester

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #10 on: May 11, 2012, 11:26:38 pm »

They're all lazy leisure loving dwarves. LOL. Its not a bug.. just... like the worst combination of personalities I've ever seen. They're all lazy selfish and obnoxious. Like, I don't even get how they got the gumption to start a fort unless they were thrown out for being lazy.

The last batch of Migrants really saved it though, had some farmers, a master fisher, and a near master gem cutter and gem setter it seems, so I think I'll be able to make it til the caravan arrives, and trade for all their food.
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Carve out a massive pit and construct a copper block tower! Challenge those goblin bastards with your phallus of justice!

SirAaronIII

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #11 on: May 11, 2012, 11:51:50 pm »

Man, that's really unlucky. They'll probably get what they deserve, though.

Which could be a wide variety of things, actually. It's really up to you.
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Rakushun

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #12 on: May 12, 2012, 01:30:59 am »

Leave these noble examples of Dwarfishness alone. Clearly they're destined for great things and are beneath manual labor. Your purpose, and the purpose of all migrants, is to serve them.
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ClkWrkJester

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #13 on: May 12, 2012, 01:46:20 am »

And then migrants showed up, immediately had a guy who needed materials I lacked, went crazy, about the time the snatchers showed up, stole some children and murdered the militia who despite training were worthless... and its turned into a massive brawl.  This fort... is just an absolute trainwreck.

Which is why I'm sitting here with a nice strong drink and am laughing as they tear each other apart. It'll be great on reclaim though.
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Carve out a massive pit and construct a copper block tower! Challenge those goblin bastards with your phallus of justice!

orius

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Re: Urist.... mind at least planting something?
« Reply #14 on: May 12, 2012, 03:33:36 am »

They're all lazy leisure loving dwarves. LOL. Its not a bug.. just... like the worst combination of personalities I've ever seen. They're all lazy selfish and obnoxious. Like, I don't even get how they got the gumption to start a fort unless they were thrown out for being lazy.

Oy, that's bad.  I say take a look at their preferences, and find a dorf that likes really common or easy to obtain materials and objects like barrels or bins or something that you don't ever plan to export and set him up to be your ruling noble.  The other six get drafted into a suicide squad or something, or at least get condemned to doing nothing but low-priority menial labor until the fort crumbles or they die.

And start a thread in the story forum about 7 lazy-ass useless slacker dorfs that got kicked out of Mountainhome for being utterly useless.  Should be fun.
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