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[Lillipad]

The object of this is for the community to make a story as terrible as possible. It's your duty in this to make as many typos, grammatical errors, plot holes, stupid/nonsensical crossovers, and whatever else you can muster up, while still having a story you can comprehend. So not every word can be a typo, not every plot can be a plot hole, so on, so forth.
There's no amount you need to write, but at least try and get a paragraph or two in. Feel free to include hyperlinks to whichever weird thing inspired you, but no images, please.
This game will function in writing chapters, when I feel that it's the end of a chapter, I'll step in and give everyone a chance to bring the chapter to a terrible close, and we can start on the next one. I will not be participating in the writing, I'm only going to act as an overseer.

With all said and done, feel free to begin chapter one.

[Iituem]

As I Loathe You

At the edge of the Forest of Arden, the young Orlando de Boys, son of the late Sir Roland de Boys, was contemplating the unfamiliar thoughts he was having towards men.  He had begun admiring young boys, and such matters troubled his mind.  Perhaps he would find a young courtly woman and woo her as was the proper way.  And then, when they had gotten to know each other a little better, perhaps he could convince her to put on a doublet and a hose, and maybe stuff a sock down her trousers and cry "Hey, Jiminy!" when they-

No.  Best not to think of such things.

At this point his brother Oliver (their father being of a vicious disposition had named the two very similarly and they had as such been mortal enemies since birth) arrived with some stern commandments that his brother should cease lazing about and get on with some work.

"You have not given me the education I deserve!" cried Orlando, who then proceeded to beat the living crap out of his brother.  "Give me my inheritance!"

"What, so you can spend it on ale and whores?" said Oliver, blood and tears streaming from his broken face.  "Why can you not be like our brother Jaques?  When he returns, he will put your worries to rest."*

"Bah!  I shall go to wrestling."

Orlando left and at that point Charles, the Duke's wrestler, burst in through the door covered in blood.

"OH YEAH!" shouted Charles.

"What on earth..." gaped Oliver, staring at Charles' bloody chest.

"Tournament's started," said Charles.  "Lots of young bucks trying to prove their worth.  I hear your brother's planning on fighting me, and I came to ask you to stop him because I'll have to rip his legs off with my teeth if he challenges me."

"It's cool, he's a dick and deserves to die.  By which I mean, oh woe is me!  He is unsufferable; the stubbornest fellow of France, full of ambition, an envious emulator of every man's good parts - a secret and villainous contriver against me, his natural brother!  Therefore use thy discretion; I had as lief thou didst break his neck as his finger.  I assure thee, there is not one so young and so villainous this day living!"

"Oh," said Charles.  "I guess I'd best get to that."

And so Charles left, dragging fragments of broken door with him.  Oliver was rather annoyed at this; he would have to call in a joiner to replace it.  Oliver glared angrily at the marigolds and swore vengeance upon his brother, that he would have the wrestler kill him in the tournament so he might finally live without fear.  He then stopped his wrathful monologue on account of his face being pulped and how speech and rage hurt.

Oliver left through the shattered door, getting a splinter in his toe in the process.

End of Scene Chapter One Sub-Scene Sc Part One Line

*Jaques is an unseen character for the entire story.

[Lillipad]

Good, it's bad. But there's a lack of spelling errors, and you ended the chapter before I said it was done. You don't need to go through and add the errors, but I'd like you to edit out the end of chapter bit.

[Iituem]

=P