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[Sensei]

When I get a huge jawbreaker, I put it in a bag and hit it with a hammer so it breaks into manageable pieces. Yeah, it's not as dramatic as trying to eat it whole, but after five minutes of trying to eat the big one you'll realize it's a better option.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, the Oompa Loompas (is that how you spell it?) must have some time to do things other than working if they can rehearse big song and dance numbers, and they seem fairly enthusiastic too. I still wonder if they meet minimum wage...

[klingon13524]

By creating a gobstopper that never loses its flavor he broke thermodynamics

Maybe it's parasitic. It never loses its flavor because you eventually die from having your nutrients stolen by it.

Sigged.

[lemon10]

When I get a huge jawbreaker, I put it in a bag and hit it with a hammer so it breaks into manageable pieces. Yeah, it's not as dramatic as trying to eat it whole, but after five minutes of trying to eat the big one you'll realize it's a better option.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, the Oompa Loompas (is that how you spell it?) must have some time to do things other than working if they can rehearse big song and dance numbers, and they seem fairly enthusiastic too. I still wonder if they meet minimum wage...

Of course they are enthusiastic, they are hopped up on drugs all the time.

I suppose he also has them learn songs for hours each day, just so they can creep out any visitors.

[Itnetlolor]

When I get a huge jawbreaker, I put it in a bag and hit it with a hammer so it breaks into manageable pieces. Yeah, it's not as dramatic as trying to eat it whole, but after five minutes of trying to eat the big one you'll realize it's a better option.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, the Oompa Loompas (is that how you spell it?) must have some time to do things other than working if they can rehearse big song and dance numbers, and they seem fairly enthusiastic too. I still wonder if they meet minimum wage...

Of course they are enthusiastic, they are hopped up on drugs all the time.

I suppose he also has them learn songs for hours each day, just so they can creep out any visitors.

I think while everyone gets their sugar rush just by looking inside the factory; Oompa Loompas get their rush off of "sugar" . Why else would they be so enthusiastic all the time, even when things seem grim?

[Loud Whispers]

It is vital that we do not forget what he wanted to do.

He was a master of confectionery, and that's where his intentions were focused.

His story highlights genius being abused...

His goal from the outset was to tempt the children into a dangerous situation.

Or he played Dwarf Fortress.

[Shinotsa]

Or he played Dwarf Fortress.

Oh god the personality rewrite is almost here. Points to the first person to re-create the factory in DF, complete with deadly temptations for greedy/selfish/otherwise flawed dwarves. In a fort specializing in the export of dwarven syrup roasts.

[Heliman]

somebody call the liberal crime squad.

It is of my personal opinion is that every gobstopper is a small gateway to the Candy Singularity: An infinite plane of pure candy which serves as the ultimate source of all candy made sold by the facility and perhaps even the universe.

[Karlito]

His goal from the outset was to tempt the children into a dangerous situation.

Honestly, I thought training monkeys to deshell nuts and not eat them is pretty damn impressive, though they were replaced with geese in the movie.

And Squirrels in the other movie... Which I thought was odd since... Squirrels don't live anywhere close to peanuts.

It was always squirrels. There were never any monkies.

And now I have lost my last shreds of credibility.

[Neonivek]

So lets see

Willy Wonka
1) Is conducting slavery
2) Child Endangerment and Endangerment as well
3) Has an illegal monopoly
4) Hosted a SHAM competition where he picked the winners

Honestly why is he the good guy?

[Zangi]

Is medical care and room & board included in the minimum wage calculation?
Is it also provided to the Oompa Loompa's whole family?
What about other infrastructures needed for the Ooompa Loompa culture/society?

[Lord Dullard]

By creating a gobstopper that never loses its flavor he broke thermodynamics

He broke gravity with sodapop.  I think I know which one I'd want.

Although now my bigger question is why was the room they tested the Makes You Fly drink in also the room with giant open fans in the ceiling.

It's obvious, man. The oompa-loompas are actually dwarves.

[King DZA]

When I get a huge jawbreaker, I put it in a bag and hit it with a hammer so it breaks into manageable pieces. Yeah, it's not as dramatic as trying to eat it whole, but after five minutes of trying to eat the big one you'll realize it's a better option.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, the Oompa Loompas (is that how you spell it?) must have some time to do things other than working if they can rehearse big song and dance numbers, and they seem fairly enthusiastic too. I still wonder if they meet minimum wage...

Of course they are enthusiastic, they are hopped up on drugs all the time.

I suppose he also has them learn songs for hours each day, just so they can creep out any visitors.

I feel this video may help shed some light on the matter.

[Neonivek]

I don't seriously think he did that though.

Even if it makes sense... perfect sense

I mean you watched the movie did ANY of the Oompa Loompas even crack a smile?

[TherosPherae]

Is medical care and room & board included in the minimum wage calculation?
Is it also provided to the Oompa Loompa's whole family?
What about other infrastructures needed for the Ooompa Loompa culture/society?

They're a bunch of short orange people whom he rescued from living in trees and eating mushed caterpillars that tasted like shit. He pays them in chocolate and houses them all in his factory. Presumably, they get paid more than minimum wage if you come up with a chocolate-to-dollar conversion ratio - however, all they are fed is chocolate, so I'd imagine they are either all malnourished or have a very unique digestive system. It is unknown whether they get medical care or if wounded Oompa-Loompas are just thrown into the incinerator. As for other infrastructures, there's nothing in canon to indicate they do anything besides sing like creeps and do factory work.

[lordcooper]

By creating a gobstopper that never loses its flavor he broke thermodynamics

Maybe it's parasitic. It never loses its flavor because you eventually die from having your nutrients stolen by it.

Someone needs to SCP this.