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[Loud Whispers]

This thread's getting dodgy

Also, after wading through the clowns and zombies, one of the Dwarfy-Avatars finally reached the bottom of the castle (after 88 clowns, two more avatars lost to insanity and who knows how many dead zombies, they keep getting back up), this apparently triggered the second wave...

Spoiler: MASSIVE SPOILER (click to show/hide)

Over three-hundred clowns. There's only one avatar against them all, and all of the peasants are unarmed and unarmoured. The sky-whale has over 90 kills now with a broken skull. The tests are proving to be a success so far.

[Eric Blank]

Your request for "two elven test subjects" as been granted!

Contained in this package are (2, male) elven prisoners (of ambiguous sexual orientation)!

When captured, the prisoners were (in posession of 'wooden scepters' of assorted sizes, and ropereed dresses while) attempting to trade (an assortment of loincloths and female clothing) at the trade depot!

We look forward to the results of you scientific experiments!

Signed, 12th bay scientific resourcing and development comittee

Why, they're perfect!  Just set them (in separate cages) in one of the operating theaters.  You'll have to wait for a bit while I clear out all these cats, though.
Speaking of which, my experimentation on the cats has produced some useful data about feline reproduction: dead cats don't breed.  While obvious in hindsight, I only stumbled upon this discovery after one of the cats to which I was welding a large metal box expired.  Anyway, a few cats did manage to survive the operation, and will now keep their litters contained.  Should anyone want to remove the kittens for any reason, I put a small hatch into the kitten-boxes.  Be advised, however, that you may have to dislocate/break several of the kitten's bones in order to remove it.  Apparently, I overestimated the flexibility of newborn cats.

What an... interesting way to permanently damage the genitalia of a creature you do not wish to breed...

[Garath]

serious, If you're going to waste time, at least don't drink the alcohol I make. There are people like KodKod making real progress on taming giant desert scorpions who can use it much better, not to mention the actual crafters. And don't try to petition the mayor, unless he's been replaced he's a vampiric ghost. Wait, go on and complain to the mayor.

[WillowLuman]

I only hope I managed to wind up in this world attached to my beloved wool greatcoat. If not, I shall have to make a new one.

I support not harming the elves! By working up good trade relations, they may one day provide us with Scorpions, after which we may !!thank!! them.

Hmm, electrical experiments are going well. Developments in cage-trap physics as discovered by Talvieno are promising. Maybe with some experimentation in that field I may be able to construct a space-time transport to escape from this place before my next regeneration... then I can get away from those kittens. Their voices. ARE. IN. MY. HEAD.

[Loud Whispers]

I support not harming the elves!

Hmm, electrical experiments are going well. Developments in cage-trap physics as discovered by Talvieno are promising. Maybe with some experimentation in that field I may be able to construct a space-time transport to escape from this place before my next regeneration... then I can get away from those kittens. Their voices. ARE. IN. MY. HEAD.

I think these two statements are related.

Say, do you think the fortress needs an re-education center insane asylum?

I do.

[WillowLuman]

I support not harming the elves!

Hmm, electrical experiments are going well. Developments in cage-trap physics as discovered by Talvieno are promising. Maybe with some experimentation in that field I may be able to construct a space-time transport to escape from this place before my next regeneration... then I can get away from those kittens. Their voices. ARE. IN. MY. HEAD.

I think these two statements are related.

Say, do you think the fortress needs an re-education center insane asylum?

I do.

Why, I've often said the same thing! I would be glad to run it! Those needing re-education treatment can be placed into my mandatory crafting lessons. After days on end, the repetitive making of crafts will completely block out all other thoughts, making the subjects open to post hypnotic suggestion. Then I can talk to them. Elves, kobolds, goblins, dwarves. I can make them all see. No more war. No more violence. There is only...
*HugoLuman trails off, with a strange, knowing smile*

[Corai]

I VOTE WE ALLOW KOBOLDS TO GO AND LEAVE AS THEY WISH.

[WillowLuman]

I VOTE WE ALLOW KOBOLDS TO GO AND LEAVE AS THEY WISH.

*HugoLuman picks up some crafts, and looks at Corai with a strange smile*

[Eric Blank]

I vote we lock them in and breed them as test subjects and auxiliary military assets. They're smart enough to learn as they fight, at least, so maybe they'll have a greater chance of survival than war dogs.

[KodKod]

I VOTE WE ALLOW KOBOLDS TO GO AND LEAVE AS THEY WISH.

Denied! Skulking vermin will be treated as such.

It's the scorpion pit with all of them.

[Corai]

.........BUT I DONT WANNA BE IN THE SCORPION PIT.

[Loud Whispers]

I vote we construct a cube, fill it with traps and see if the Kobolds can make it out

[Corai]

I vote we construct a cube, fill it with traps and see if the Kobolds can make it out

What you say? I didnt hear you.

CoraiUnki walks through three cage traps, a stone-fall trap, and a fake-floor trap


What did you say?

[Loud Whispers]

Geet out of my cube!

[Eric Blank]

I VOTE WE ALLOW KOBOLDS TO GO AND LEAVE AS THEY WISH.

Denied! Skulking vermin will be treated as such.

It's the scorpion pit with all of them.

We should maintain a good-sized breeding population at all times. They're not quite intelligent, but certainly easier to train than any other animals.

I vote we construct a cube, fill it with traps and see if the Kobolds can make it out

They probably would if the traps are triggered solely by pressure plates, as they would avoid them.