Deep in the caverns, a project years in the making was had reached a key point. An oddly-shaped chamber next to the top of a magma pipe had been excavated and constructed. The few valuable stones within had been cleared out. Now a dwarf of no particular note, a near-unknown in this fortress, had been asked to go down and perform a dangerous yet vital step in the project.The magma-spitting creatures which dwell in the pipe do not attack him. Perhaps they simply do not notice as the magma is siphoned off. Perhaps he is lucky, or perhaps he tossed something into the magma to calm them beforehand, if one could believe such a preposterous thing.In any case, the magma chamber beneath the smithing floor fills without incident.
Far, far above, Ral Mistemmeng the broker is trading for supplies."You brought us rocks? I think we have plenty of rocks. Look, there's still bauxite boulders on the floor over there."
"Look, don't complain to me. We got a very important note last year telling us to bring these specific stones. Order came from a Doctor Cain, marked urgent."
Ral shrugged. "Ah, we better buy them then. He'll know what else to do with them. Now, we have the military supplies you requested."
"Top quality, made by our very own Baroness. The General should be very pleased with these. We'll also be making up for not sending any animal the last few years now. I present to you breeding populations of not one but two Brightwater animals, trained by our very own Cilob and his assistants."
"With the attached notes on care, you should be able to breed these back at the Mountainhomes. They're ugly, but damn tasty. Our butcher Argel has worked out how to make something he calls 'Bacon' from them. It's damn addictive."
The conversation is interrupted as Erush the clothier steps into the trade depot. "Did they bring it?" he demands.Ral nods. "Yes, Erush. Your cloth is all here."
"It's about time. I've been using this inferior stuff from the humans and elves for way too long."
Erush departs. Ral shakes her head, and continues,"Sorry about that. He's a bit annoying, but really does make quite good clothing. Now, we were discussing food. We've prepared some special meals for the Queen. Here we have an exquisite Cuttlefish salad"
"And some deep-fried cuttlefish and warthog fritters."
"Our baroness was insistent that we export this dish. Seemed to upset her for some reason. I'm not sure why, I tried some and it was delicious."
"Finally, we have some Scorpion Eye Surprise. It's really better than it sounds."
"Now, I assume you've brought the usual supplies, and the animals we've requested? Cats for the guarding the food stockpiles, a few geese that Geb requested, and ... what in the world is that thing?"
The trader from the Mountainhomes smiled broadly. "You aren't the only fortress who's been taming exotic animals. This is from Boarrooms. It's called a Tofurkey."
Inside the cage was a grotesque-looking creature. It was shaped exactly like a common turkey, but was composed entirely of a pale, off-white, semi-gelatinous substance. Feathers, beak, talons, skin, even the eyes were made of the same material. Not breathing, not seeming to respond to its environment in any way, Ral would have thought it unliving, until it suddenly shifted position bonelessly, shuffling across its cage with a gurgle.
As she stared in horrified fascination, the trader continued to explain."Their cavern expedition came across a race of strange mushroom-people, deep underground. I don't mean living with mushrooms or using them, they were actually made of mushroom tissue, like plump helmets shaped like dwarves. Really freaky if you think about it. Anyway, these plump helmet men, they kept flocks of these birds. Well, not really birds - they're actually some kind of self-propelled, bird-shaped vegetable. They called them 'tofurkeys', and their flesh is referred to as 'tofu'. Anyway, they don't seem to need to eat, or breathe for that matter. Don't bleed or feel pain. No bones or feathers or cartilage or anything like that. Barely need butchering, just slice them up and eat them raw, or cook them into something. I figure if your cook can make something edible out of scorpion eyes, tofu should be no problem."
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Topic: Brightwater: Community fortress of science, oceans, and animal taming (Read 154833 times)