Turn 31: With thanks to #bay12lb for the ideasMaka:Examine chest for locks or other loot inhibitors.
(1) The chest seems perfectly safe and openable. You double-triple checked it, tapping it from all sides, licking it (Ow! Splinter!), tapping it with your foot, so... (6) ...only the fact that Maka chose to open the chest by a hearthy thwack of her scepter saved her. The chest flies off but not without shooting a jet of weird blue liquid directly at Maka! (4) She dodges. Well, mostly. Okay, she got some of it on her clothing, and even manages to avoid Helskaya's attempts to lick it.
Meanwhile, the booby-trapped chest slides down the far wall. It is unopened again, and the local foilage appears to slowly boil away around it.
Apollo:Continue trying to find a way out.
(5) You remember that you have a dagger. Look for it yourself, it's like the first item in your inventory. You feel very dumb for not being up to date with your inventory, and resolve to keep those bottomless pockets of stuff in mind.
With the dagger in hand, the overwhelming task of untangling the cosmic earphone cable tangle soon devolves into cutting the knot. He goes at it a bit too vehemently, but most of the things that once compromised Apollo's hot sweaty grave are still intact, as is Elenor, who you probably have waken up again. Whoopsie. He seems none too happy about it, but after learning that he tried to sleep nearly right on top of another man he shuffles away awkwardly.
Helskaya:Take out my axe and sit down for a rest.
(6) Did I mention you are on a trip? Of course. You are always on a trip. This one is involving a hypergalactic slug. You ride this hypergalactic slug like a mechanical bear, throwing axes at things everywhere. Thankfully, you are also high enough to miss your teammates, but perhaps the axes need to be retrieved at some point.
And then you are not. Then, you hallucinate you are sane. It is very trippy, so you imitate animals instead.
Taren:Search the room for any other passages or entryways, and then shoot the Chest Lock with a bolt from my crossbow. (6)
(6) He motions for the rest of the party to stand aside. This is a matter for true renegados, those that, standing broad legged like the Colossus of Rhodes, can pull their crossbow in under one second flat and drink several pints a day. (They never specified what kind of pints, so Taren went with orange juice.) The first action, the Renegado Staredown.
The chest has no eyes and as such is a bit difficult to stare down. Hoping for some support of the sun, Taren looks up, but no dice. The sweltering sun of the noon has receded many hours in the past.
Helskaya rolls around miming a tumbleweed.
Taren's hand moves very, very slowly, inching towards his crossbow. The chest looks like it's tensing up as well.
And then, everything is over in a flash.
(6) (5) The treasure chest is broken. Destroyed. Its loot scattered everywhere. But Taren, too, got hit. In the face. By a stinking jet of ichor or pus or whatever the hell that is, URGH. Excusing himself, he goes off to fertilize the plants and wash that stuff out of his face.
He doesn't feel too well, and probably lost that bolt, too.
Elenor:Search for good place to rest, rest.
(2) Thou only findeth moderately hard floor. You attempt to sleep, but the rest of the party is too noisy.
Your stomach growls. Some stupid bee is stinging you and screaming "DIRECT HIT!" Aaaaand Elizabeth is calling. Oh well.
"Hey."
"Yeh?"
"Just wanted to warn you, that room you're in has a booby-trapped chest."
"You don't say."
"I didn't think you'd mess it up THAT bad."
"Hah."
"That fluid it shot has the magical signature of a plague carrier."
"Oh dear."
"You know what to do against it?"
"I want to sleep."
"...fine. Isn't infectious, I think."
Still no dice. Well, might put that off for a little bit. Smells like dinner is coming up soon...
Komas>Push stew-wheelbarrow.
>Catch up with the others.
>Demand to know what we are doing now, and if anyone brought bowls etcetera.
"Th'hell're we doin'? Where're we makin' camp? If'n you wants some stew, you provide a bloody bowl. Ain't havin' none of you stick yer grubby paws in me cookin'."
...>Whack anyone trying to stick their grubby paws in my cooking with Heinkel.
(5) "Alright, camp time, mateys." You're not sure about the mateys. It feels off. Quite sure about the camp though, it's definitely going to be set up here. "Yer in for a treat IF you gots bowls."
It's amazing where they pull all the bowls from. It's amazing how often Hel tries to sneak in without a bowl. Finally, he goes ahead and uses his bong even though he's the only one who actually probably has a personal bowl somewhere that wasn't an unsuspecting turtle five minutes ago. You ask him why, he replies "For that extra spice." You shrug.
And there was much feasting.
Remy:Victory dance from solving the puzzle.
(4) You did it! You solved it! You could just have button mashed instead! And now the loot is all yours, since nobody else seems to care about it!
Found loot: Ornate Key x1, Plain Key x1, 400 cp, Trap Components x1, Ceremonial Dagger x1, Bikini Armor x1
--
Anyway. It's bed time.
You roll the dice to see who stands guard. Nobody wants Lawas to stand guard, in his current state. The dice land on... Elenor. He protests. The others protest back. Elenor protest even louder. He gets shoved.
Fiiiiine, he thinks, if you want a guard that naps away all the time...
Some time passes. Everyone is asleep. Everyone? No, one person who drew the short straw and doesn't ever get to rest because he has something close to a sense of duty is still clinging to awareness. The campfire is cracklin', someone has organized a tent, there has been a small brawl over who gets to sleep in the tent, the stew is outside and going cold, and it really just looks like the aftermath of a rather pitched battle.
There is Maka, lying in her bathtub, with the water still inside. She has cleverly put it close to the fire to keep her bath heated, a towel wrapped around her head and her clothing just lying about somewhere. Public nudity might be funny when it's a bunch of middle-aged bishops or something, Elenor thinks, but if it's an underage girl she should really put something on. Or at least a lid onto that tub. A bit farther from that, Remy is the only person who actually brought a bedroll and is not sleeping on the rocky floor. He is sleeping under his mountain of loot, and the rogue knight is sorely tempted to put him ONTO the loot. Lying under it is pointless. He's also hugging his gunchucks, it seems.
Komas Hopatke is the person who has managed to secure the tent for himself and his considerable girth and gruffy gruffiness. He seems to have put it up quite far from the campfire, actually, under the shadow of the central pedestal, just lying on the stone floor. It might just be his definition of comfortable.
Apollo is using his bear ass as a pillow. Jesus. Why? Tiruin, on the other hand, despite lying very close to the fire on a bunch of ratman cloth, doesn't look too well. Elenor remembers the thing with the plague. Perhaps it is actually serious and the half-pint archmagical bookworm has a point. ...nah, better wait some more. And, finally, the bear. Up to this day, Elenor didn't know that bears snored. Now he'd never forget it.
Surprisingly boring. Weird.
Elizabeth attempts to chat. Again.
Accept <Y/N>?
Helskaya Arkut (lawastooshort)
Status: Through yogic power this leg shall heal
Injuries: Fine, although that scar on the left leg is here to stay. Indigestion.
Equipment: Pair of knives (one large, one small),
northern white bear jawbone on necklace, northern white bearskin.
Inventory: Wet stone, firestone, pot, spoon, three leather pouches varying in size, pestle and mortar, dried meat rations for several plus more days, filled waterskin, flour, Lesser Herbal Medicine, Lesser Blade Poison, Rusty Axe, random precious metal baubles, two lumps of crystallized magic, nine magic slices, lesser diluted mana potion x2, potion of okay healing x2, stoneskin potion, 60 cp, magic bong.
Skills: Herbal Medicine; Shamanic Magic; Knowledge (Legends of the North)
Spells:
Shining Shamanic Healing Finger!, Transform: Raging North Bear, Summon Water Elemental
Elenor Warsen (Caellath)
Status: Half-asleep.
Injuries: Several semi-deep cuts on left shoulder. Scalded.
Equipment:
Masterwork Armor, Longsword, Crossbow,
Dragon Crest Shield, small well-crafted crossbow,
Magic Sapping Amulet.
Inventory: Medical kit, small supplies bag, 0 cp, Potion of Lesser Healing, Painkiller Potion, Gibberish Paper, Map Shred, Rations Listing, some longbolt ammo.
Skills: Result-oriented swordsmanship, Dodger's Agility, Marksmanship, Medical care, Taunting, Dabbling Investigator [1].
Spells: None. He's notoriously unmagical.
Apollo Anderson (Spinal_Taper)
Status: Sickish. Do not spin directly around.
Injuries: Rock firmly embedded in face. A bunch of bumps.
Equipment: Reinforced lab coat, cheap leather armor,
Dagger,
Rudimentary Rifle, Officer's Scimitar
Inventory: Bullets[inf], Enchanted Bullets[11], Gunpowder, various pouches and bags, Experimental Painkiller (?) Potion, 119 cp, Bear teeth, One Bear Ass, Ammo Mod, a bunch of furs.
Skills: Alchemy: Chemistry, Alchemy: Potion brewing, Alchemic Magic: Rudimentary Enchantments (quantum amount +2), Metal Working (quantum amount +1).
Spells: Enchantment: Better wearability!, Piercing [?] Bullet Enchantments
Taren Creyn (Tiruin)
Status: Blessed.... with dribbling skills. Hilt Charge: 90% (Ice), 55% (Fire), 100% (Lightning)
Injuries: Numb legs. Not feeling too well...
Equipment:
Broadsword, Crossbow, Longbolt ammunition (quantum amount -5), white cloak, grey tunic, belt, solid holey leather boots,
buckler.
Inventory: Whet stone, one filled waterskin, Cloth, lots of rations, ratman cloth, 118 cp, Element Hilt.
Skills: White Magic: Healing, Anatomy, Swordsmanship, Marksmanship
Spells:
Menscur, Fogili, Nonsens, Mendia,
Leonic Cleanse,
Vi Vanita,
Vento Aureo.
Komas Hopatke (Yoink)
Status: More gruff than usual.
Injuries: Thorn punctures, some stuck in. Cold, but not life-threateningly so.
Equipment:
One large, battered wooden oar named Heinkel, Worn and poorly-made sealskins, An eyepatch, iron boning knife.
Inventory: Fishing pole, bait, compass, immortal tasty lobster, 100 cp, large wheelbarrow of spicy mystery stew.
Skills:
Rowing,
Cooking,
Fishing,
Navigation.
Spells: Nnnope.
Remy Maelle (Remaelle)
Status: Serious magic exhaustion.
Injuries: Minus five toes and right middle finger. Slightly chilled.
Equipment: A spirit talisman, knife, leather armour, traveling clothes, a backpack, Vintage pair of Chain Revolvers, buckler.
Inventory: Bedroll, rope, tinderbox, enough food to last a few days,
Debt notice,
officer's helmet, Contract, Gunchucks Guide Book w/ Leaflet, Remote Control Tape, Ornate Key x1, Plain Key x1, 400 cp, Trap Components x1, Ceremonial Dagger x1, Bikini Armor x1.
Skills:
Shamanistic Magic: Elementalism, Agility, Quick Reflexes, Hand-to-Hand Combat,
Gunchucks Usage.
Spells:
MEGA BRAND,
Perfect Freeze,
Flare Arrow Maka R'lyeh-Voile (IronyOwl)
Status: Still energetic, somewhat magnetic. Somewhat burned out by now.
Injuries: None (that she notices).
Equipment:
Magical golden scepter, Very Frilly Towel, Backpack
Inventory:
Surgeon's Kit, 105 cp, Book: Gene Engineering, Fleshgrafting and You, Snail Shell, Very Frilly Dress, Electro-Jelly-inna-cage (loyal, remote-controlled servant), Belt w/ pouches, Fun Gun.
Skills: Creating Servants, Alchemic Magic: Augmenting Living Stuff, Dodging, Black Magic: Curses.
Spells:
Psycho Shackles.