Round 11: Hallowe'en EpisodeExplorer Bob: ”Now it’s time to explore this dark forest”
*Walks past the sign saying “Keep Out”*
Explorer Bob: “Oh My GOD is that Slenderman”
Explorer Bob: “No that’s just a cardboard cut out.”
*pushes the fake Slenderman over*
Explorer Bob: “hah take that”
*A loud noise happens behind Explorer Bob and he turns around*
Explorer Bob: “AHHHHHHHHHHHHH I’m going to die”
*Explorer Bob runs off*
Headless horseman: “What was that about? Oh My GOD is that Slenderman”
*the headless horseman grabs the cardboard Slenderman*
Explorer: La-la-la, I'm a naive explorer naively going into a haunted forest pretty obviously marked by 'keep out' signs. La-la-la.
Explorer: OH CRAP IT'S SLENDERMAN
Explorer: Actually nevermind, it's just a cardboard cutout. DIE CARDBOARD CUTOUT
Explorer: Hm... what's this sound...
Explorer: OH CRAP IT'S THE HEADLESS HORSEMAN
Headless Horseman: This cardboard cutout is mine. Fuck you, explorer.
A small child, within a baseball cap, walks through a very scary forest. Death is written on it, but not all over it. Signs, or at least a sign, tells him to "Keep Out".
Then Slenderman shows up, but lacking his tentacles. And his suit is white now.
The kid approaches him, only to find that Slenderman is, in truth, a cardboard cutout.
He slays it anyway.
This pisses off the headless horseman, who's horse has recently gained an eyepatch, enough to attack the child.
*Adventuring noises*
Bob: [quietly, speaking to self] "Oh jeez... I really don't wanna go into the haunted woods of death. I mean, like, I really don't. But I have to! I need a soil sample for Mister Orange's science class!"
Ghost: "Gubawhaaaagh! I am the ghost of Whitey Bignose, lynched on this spot for a crime I did not commit!"
Bob: *EPIC PICKAXE SWING*
Ghost: Bluuuuurk. *DEAD*
Headless Horseman: "Rarrh! Rarrrgh! Arr! Arrr, arrrgh arrrrgghhh!"
Headless Horseman's horse(with head): "He means to say, we're going to kill you and stuff. Sorry."
Horse: *LASERBEAMS*
Bob: *FACE ASPLODES*
Person: Man, this forest is boring. I wish I was back at home collecting bird's nests with Uncle Turkey-Hat.
...
Man, Uncle Turkey-Hat is w- OH MY GOD.
Spirit: Congratulations, brave adventurer! I am the spirit of these woods, and I am here to grant y- *ARGLE*
Person (with bloody pick-axe in hand): This will forever be my secret...
Headless Horseman: Not so fast, knave!
Person: The headless horseman!
Headless Horseman: Indeed, foul villain!
Horse: Neigh!
*LAZERS*
Person: *BARGLE*
Headless Horseman: Justice is served.
Horse: Neigh!
Headless Horseman: Ha ha! Indeed, noble steed. Ha ha indeed.
dude: "man, I wish *I* had a bird on my head."
dude: "uh-oh"
ghost: "heeeere I cooome!"
dude: "I don't think so! Taste pickaxe" *SMASH, IMPALE*
Headless horseman: "Taste auto-fire!!"
dude: "N-no! Don't hurt me!"
gun strapped to horse: RATATATATATATATATA
dude: *dieing sounds*
Headless horseman: "**** yea!"
Albert the Red: Wow. Gross. Is that a pigeon on his head? Or a peregrine falcon? Is that John F Kennedy?
Albert the Red: OH SHIT NO IT’S JOHN THE EVIL GHOST! TIME FOR…
THE PICK OF DOOM!
Albert the Red: Oh wait. Ghosts bleed?
The Fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse: Behold, Albert the Red! You have horrifically slain your best friend Roger, who sought but to innocently play an amusing prank to enliven your day! I cast upon thee the spell of righteous justice, Burning Pumpkin Head of Hell!
Albert the Red: What? Oh no! Wait! Behold, the Whirly Armed Ritual of Repentance! Hang on, that’s your head, isn’t it. You can’t throw that at me! YOU CAN’T HURT ME, FIFTH HORSEMAN OF THE APOCALYPSE! YOU CANNOT SLAY ME WITH YOUR HEAD OF FLAME!
The Fifth Horseman of the Apocalypse: Oh. Balls. Yes… you’re right. Oh well… [raises M16] Time to meet my little friend! MUAHAHAHAHAH!
Albert the Red: Oh crap. I… er… Ah.