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Author Topic: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]  (Read 61323 times)

adwarf

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #195 on: April 11, 2012, 03:21:52 pm »

Run away, and leave the heroes behind, one day I shall return ...
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IronyOwl

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #196 on: April 11, 2012, 03:22:30 pm »

WELP

At least now I know exactly what I'm going to get smited for!


Return to Odysseus with the goods.
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The kitchenette mold free, you move on to the pantry. it's nasty in there. The bacon is grazing on the lettuce. The ham is having an illicit affair with the prime rib, The potatoes see all, know all. A rat in boxer shorts smoking a foul smelling cigar is banging on a cabinet shouting about rent money.

monk12

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #197 on: April 11, 2012, 08:19:56 pm »

Mr. Wiffles:  Go sulk back to Mama.  (That is, Coratra)

Take a nap on her bed!

Gatleos

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #198 on: April 14, 2012, 07:32:39 pm »

"Character Meatgrinder" is such a harsh term. I prefer to think of it as a well-oiled waitlist.

Also, the name of this turn sounds like the name of a snooty art film.

Turn 6 - Justice, Technically

(...) Taricus slinks silently into the alleyway as the adventurers approach the cart, and Vladimir calls out to the innkeeper!
"You there! Stop where you stand!"
The innkeeper raises his hands. "Oh, is this your cart?"
Odysseus runs up behind the others and looks at him for a moment. "Hey, aren't you the innkeeper?"
"Why yes, I am."
"What's going on here?!"
"That filthy street urchin and his strange dog attacked me, that's what happened!" The innkeeper points behind himself for a moment, then turns around. "Uh... he was here just a moment ago."
"Did you see which way he went?"
"No. Dammit! How did-"
(...) Suddenly, Caddio appears with Azatek in a headlock! (...) Derm follows close behind.
"Odysseus! Odysseus! I got your stuff AND I caught the criminal who stole the wagon! He confessed! Honest!"
Odysseus stares quizzically. "Well, then. I suppose we really have found our culprit. Innkeeper-"
"Daltran."
"Daltran, could you point us to the guard garrison?"
(...) Caddio cries out in pain as Azatek bites his hand and breaks into a sprint away from the group!
"You'll never catch me alive!! HAHAHAHAHAHA"

Odysseus motions to Coratra, and she pulls a knife from her sleeve and flings it at Azatek. It skims across his back, creating a huge gash, then curves around his head and slices off his left ear! Azatek falls to his knees, bleeding and shaking. Coratra then fires an arrow through his head, finishing him off. He falls to the ground, slain in the streets of Avindell.
Vladimir leans against the cart. "I knew that kid was trouble. Well, at least we got our cart back." [+2 MP (ALL)]
Odysseus sighs and sheathes his sword. "Well, we're never recruiting near Zabrek again, that's for sure." He glances at Caddio and Derm. "No offense."
Caddio takes a quick glance at Azatek, forcing a twitchy smile. "None taken! Oh, I got... your supplies! Here!" Caddio hands over the supplies to Odysseus, who tosses them into the wagon. [+2 MP (ODY)]
"Good job! Your first tasks are complete. I assume, uh... Byron... wait... er, Brendan, Balthazar... whatever. I assume he has prepared dinner by now. It's time we all got a bite to eat, we will set out in the morning after picking up a, er... replacement squire."

Caddio and Derm load the spilled supplies into the cart, and they and the adventurers pile in. Mr. Wiffles wanders out of a nearby alleyway and hops into the cart, laying down in Coratra's lap. Davkul grabs the hitch at the head of the cart and drags it back up the hill to the inn, and everyone heads inside. (...) Bryan, who had been successfully defending his stew up until now, welcomes them to his impromptu kitchen. The night concludes in peace as the adventurers and their caddies consume the abundance of stew and head off to sleep.

The group awakes the next day to find a light rain storm passing over the town of Avindell. It is a dreary, dull day, but the party must keep moving. Your duty cannot afford to wait.

***Begin RP Passage***
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Status

Player: lawastooshort
Name: Bryan
Adventurer: Davkul Stalkingwolf [HP:20/20] [MP:14/20]
Currently: Inn; sleeping.
Inventory: Peasant Robe
[HP:10/10]

Player: dermonster
Name: Derek Letum
Adventurer: Ravaatra Hellbinder [HP:20/20] [MP:16/20]
Currently: Inn; sleeping.
Inventory: Peasant Robe
[HP:10/10]

Player: Taricus
Name: Raul
Adventurer: Vladimir Silverblade [HP:20/20] [MP:14/20]
Currently: Inn; sleeping.
Inventory: Peasant Robe
[HP:10/10]

Player: IronyOwl
Name: Caddio Nine
Adventurer: Odysseus Hawklight [HP:20/20] [MP:16/20]
Currently: Inn; sleeping.
Inventory: Peasant Robe
[HP:10/10]

Adventurer: Coratra Gladomain [HP:20/20] [MP:14/20]

Spoiler: Mr. Wiffles (Dongrel) (click to show/hide)

Hero Caddies      Book I: The Bane of Gortharius      Chapter I: The Chalice of Hope
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monk12

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #199 on: April 14, 2012, 07:42:36 pm »

Whee cutscene!

Dermonster

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #200 on: April 14, 2012, 07:45:41 pm »

"So," Derek halts, wondering exactly how one is supposed to address his employer. "Um, Miss(?) Hellbinder, I've heard a lot of tales of your group from wandering bards and such, but they always seem to, uh, trail off once they reach your bits. It always drove me sorta mad, 'cause they would just kinda skip over a large portion and suddenly the entire castle was on fire or something with no explanation. Come to think of it, the bards we got were always really crap anyway. I don't suppose you could tell me a little about what you do?"
« Last Edit: April 14, 2012, 08:52:40 pm by dermonster »
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

Gatleos

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #201 on: April 14, 2012, 08:04:34 pm »

"I'm afraid you aren't high enough rank to learn these things, Derek. And I'm not referring to your rank in the Hero's GuildTM. The mark on your neck will inform you of your current rank."
Derek reaches onto the back of his neck, and feels a hard, unnatural bump he hadn't noticed before.
"Ask me again about what I do when you feel three bumps. Oh, and let's just keep this between you and me. Loose lips sink ships, and that biological bomb is very sensitive to disloyalty."

Vladimir and Coratra step outside to attach the rain cover to the wagon, and Ravaatra wanders off somewhere.
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Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
Quote from: Moonshadow101
it would be funny to see babies spontaneously combust
Gat HQ (Sigtext)
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Dermonster

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #202 on: April 14, 2012, 08:13:29 pm »

Derek blinks. "Well that's certainly a thing that just happened. So, where are we headed to?"
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I can do anything I want, as long as I accept the consequences.
"Y'know, my favorite thing about being a hero is that it gives you all kinds of narrative justification to just slay any ol' jerk who gets in the way - Black Mage.
"The bulk of [Derm]'s atrocities seem to stem from him doing things that [Magic] doesn't actually do." - TvTropes
"Dammit Derm!" - You, if I'm doing it right.
Moved to SufficientVelocity / Spacebattles.

Gatleos

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #203 on: April 15, 2012, 11:21:12 am »

Odysseus starts stowing things in his backpack. "The city of Quarrin. It's the first of three stops on our way. They have a certain artifact there that we will require on our quest."

Davkul begins hitching up the horses. It's almost time to leave!

((I wasn't kidding about moving at a swift pace. Scelly9 is up, but we'll just move right on through the waitlist if need be.))
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Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
Quote from: Moonshadow101
it would be funny to see babies spontaneously combust
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Scelly9

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #204 on: April 15, 2012, 11:26:13 am »

A small figure appears on the horizon, running to catch up with the cart before it leaves.
You hear a faint voice yelling "Sorry I'm late!" before catching up. "So, the bartender told me you needed a hand. I'm Denor, where are we headed?"
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You taste the jug! It is ceramic.
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monk12

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #205 on: April 26, 2012, 01:34:18 pm »

Mr. Wiffles licks the narrator roughly and thoroughly!

Caellath

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #206 on: April 26, 2012, 01:35:54 pm »

Mr. Wiffles licks the narrator roughly and thoroughly!
This.
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"Hey steve." You speak into the air.
>Yes?
"Could you guys also make a hamburger out of this arm when they cut it off? I wanted to eat it just for the sake of tasting it."
>That is horrible and disgusting. It will no doubt set you apart and create fear in your team mates. So of course.

Toaster

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #207 on: April 26, 2012, 01:51:56 pm »

Mr. Wiffles licks the narrator roughly and thoroughly!
This.

And lovingly!
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HMR stands for Hazardous Materials Requisition, not Horrible Massive Ruination, though I can understand how one could get confused.
God help us if we have to agree on pizza toppings at some point. There will be no survivors.

Gatleos

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #208 on: April 26, 2012, 04:26:16 pm »

See?! Swift pace!

The narrator struggled for a few moments under the weight of Mr. Wiffles, then continued with the story.

The adventurers' cart bounces through the rain-soaked street as droplets pound the rain cover above the party's heads. Coratra gently guides the horses along, heading for the edge of town. Someone can be heard yelling and running after the cart, and Odysseus spins around in his seat.
"Oh, there he is. Derek, mind helping our new associate onto the cart?"

Caddio sits at the head of the cart, behind the driver's seat. As the cart leaves the town of Avindell bound south, one of the town guards standing at the gate locks eyes with him. The guard makes a curious sign with his hand.
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Think of it like Sim City, except with rival mayors that seek to destroy your citizens by arming legions of homeless people and sending them to attack you.
Quote from: Moonshadow101
it would be funny to see babies spontaneously combust
Gat HQ (Sigtext)
++U+U++ // ,.,.@UUUUUUUU

Caellath

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Re: Hero Caddies RtD! [Book I, Chapter I]
« Reply #209 on: April 26, 2012, 04:27:40 pm »

The guard makes a curious sign with his hand.
Oh yeah, Caddio is now a scientologist.
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"Hey steve." You speak into the air.
>Yes?
"Could you guys also make a hamburger out of this arm when they cut it off? I wanted to eat it just for the sake of tasting it."
>That is horrible and disgusting. It will no doubt set you apart and create fear in your team mates. So of course.
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